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LadyHugs -> RE: To talk or not (11/3/2006 10:10:07 PM)
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Dear lilserenity, Ladies and Gentlemen;
As a dominant, I also have a life away from the home PC. I am involved with community as well as care giver. Once I had two to provide care to, now I am down to one. My sibling does not do their share in giving me a break. I find myself doing my sibling's job and mine as well.
Before my daughterly duties got me so nailed down per se; I always tried my dead level best to warn people of the 'Expect the unexpected.' I live in a neighborhood that was build in the late 1940s and early 1950's. Telephone and power lines are above grown, trees all around, its often true that Air Conditioning in summer isn't needed due to the shade. But, as trees age, die and such; weather takes some trees down and out. So, I'm at the mercy of 'mother nature.'
I honestly had zero time to get on the PC and email anybody, when a parent had a sudden heart attack. Totally a shocker, and had to tow the other parent with Alzheimer's along, have them dress and such as to transport them both to the hospital. First time and trip, the parent survived the severe heart attack. Got home from the hospital, being the one driving and dealing with a freaked out parent. In four hours the parent was dead in the chair and the whirl of emergency and crisis handling went into gear, only taking the one parent DOA and a freaked out parent and sibling in a daze. I honestly had no time.
The day after my parent's death, I had an academy class to teach. I had my handouts and gear and don't know how I made it but, I did.
I did the parents funeral planning, cemetary stuff and went back home and then changed, picked up my gear and went back to the academy, did it again, bury the parent and went to the academy afterwards.
I've had to drop out of my involvment at the academy, as the surviving parent and the running of house and grounds got to much.
I take my parent at times twice a day to different doctors.
It isn't that I'm avoiding--I just have little time. And, when I do have time, I make the best of it.
If I was void of all this currently, I could afford to be available for a clingy and needy slave. But, if I don't take care of myself--I won't be good to anybody.
My slave robert was the perfect slave for such a situation I am in now, if he was around. He isn't but; my slave robert was my sunshine and positive charge always. He let me set the pace. In times of his crisis, I let him set the pace. We're still the best of friends and hold deep affections for each other. When my life is at a dull roar again--perhaps we'll resume our lives together. And--maybe not. Never know.
But, it is true--a female dominant I know has had their father die about five times now. So, I wouldn't be surprised if other people, regardless if dominant or submissive used such an excuse. Sometimes, you just have to trust people are telling the truth unless you have such evidence of some stretched truth, like a father dying five times--excuses used in different groups at different times. Just forgets that some people are in different groups also.
Respectfully submitted for consideration,
Lady Hugs
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