RE: How long is to long to wait to meet r/t?

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RE: How long is to long to wait to meet r/t? - 10/29/2006 9:32:59 PM

MasterNdorei

Posts: 658
Joined: 10/8/2005
Status: offline

i am willing to wager he is married, but even if he is not...

If a Dom is managing to make other things happen in their life, but can not manage to meet a submissive who has already proven herself, the sub will never be a priority to this man.

If the Dom is unable to make time for anything else in his life, and the sub is falling into that category, chances are they do not have the kind of time a relationship would need anyway.

There is no easy way out. i am sending best wishes and hugs your way...

Master's dorei

(in reply to SolitarySoul)

Post #: 41

RE: How long is to long to wait to meet r/t? - 10/29/2006 9:50:08 PM

toservez

Posts: 1733
Joined: 9/7/2006
From: All over now in Minnesota
Status: offline

Personally I cannot see a reason that is good enough for him not to have seen you. Seven hours away just is not far enough for most of the legit reasons that others have mentioned and experienced. Unless there is some very legit reason that you know of but have not shared. I cannot believe that you or him cannot afford to hop in a car and drive that and that niether of you have had a weekend off or two other days or even met half way.

Respect is a two way street and him making you jump through hoops like this when it seems that you have done plenty and communicated your need to see him in real time. Like Juliaoceania said if your needs are not being met then you need to fix that one way or the other and quite frankly if this person cannot take your needs and desires into consideration you are probably better off without him. There is just something way wrong here. Sorry for being so blunt.

_____________________________

I am sorry I do not fit Webster's defintion of a slave but thankfully my Master is not Webster.

"Anything that contradicts experience and logic should be abandoned." - H.H. The 14th Dalai Lama

(in reply to MasterNdorei)

Post #: 42

RE: How long is to long to wait to meet r/t? - 10/29/2006 9:51:45 PM

Owned1

Posts: 847
Joined: 7/6/2005
From: Toronto, Ontario
Status: offline

I have a couple of questions that should shed a bit of light, do you have his home phone number, full name and address?
Do you know more about him other than online Dom, for example what he does for work, what his hobbies are, what he does in his spare time, information about his past, relationships, kids family etc?

Are you able to contact him at anytime at his home?

I would suggest unless, after a year you have most of this information if not all then he is married or simply playing online. With no intention of meeting real time.

If you do have all of this information and yet still you wait, if it is too long for you then perhaps it is time to have an honest open discussion with him and state your feelings.

At the end of that discussion then it may be up to you to make a decision that works for you. You are a submissive not a door mat.

I wish you the best in this difficult time

Owned

_____________________________

~~in His Chains i am free~~

(in reply to MasterNdorei)

Post #: 43

RE: How long is to long to wait to meet r/t? - 10/30/2006 3:40:01 AM

MasterRobert1

Posts: 225
Joined: 7/18/2005
Status: offline

Lots of people playing games online. And this Dom sounds like one of them. I think it's time to move on.

(in reply to Imsosly4u)

Post #: 44

RE: How long is to long to wait to meet r/t? - 10/30/2006 4:50:37 AM

Kalira

Posts: 954
Joined: 10/9/2006
From: Fort Wayne Indiana
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Imsosly4u

it has been almost a year and i've yet to see my Master face to face.
when i have talked to Him about this, He says that i have to earn it,
okay, i have completed every task and am still waiting. How long is to
long? i never was seeking an internet Dom, and that was not supposed to
be how would be.

What utter BS. Cut him loose. Master and I waited a whole three days, and we live in seperate states.

_____________________________

Facilius Per Partes In Cognitionem Totius Adducimur
We are more easily led part by part to an understanding of the whole.
Seneca

Damnant Quod Non Intellegunt

(in reply to Imsosly4u)

Post #: 45

RE: How long is to long to wait to meet r/t? - 10/30/2006 5:21:02 AM

MsSonnetMarwood

Posts: 1898
Joined: 2/10/2005
From: Eastern Shore, Maryland
Status: offline

You're getting the run around. But you know that already.

If this person wanted a real life relationship with you, he'd have taken steps to make that happen long before this.

I basically have a 75-mile radius of distance where I'd consider someone - this is dictated by my living arrangements and also by a hectic school/work schedule. If I'm going to meet someone, I'm going to meet them fairly quickly - no longer than a month after first contact, and for nothing more than coffee or lunch. An hour conversation face to face tells me much more about about a person than months and months online will ever tell me. I also think it's a numbers game - the more people you meet, the more likely you'll meet someone that clicks with you. But you won't find that endlessly typing online.

< Message edited by MsSonnetMarwood -- 10/30/2006 5:26:24 AM >

_____________________________

~Ms. Sonnet Marwood~

Deja Moo: The feeling you've heard this bull somewhere before.

(in reply to Kalira)

Post #: 46

RE: How long is to long to wait to meet r/t? - 10/30/2006 5:22:48 AM

Aubre

Posts: 478
Joined: 12/9/2004
Status: offline

I'd say move on. You obviously want r/t and he doesn't. Move to someone who does - but make it clear that you won't wait that long before a r/t meeting. Save time, life is short.

(in reply to Kalira)

Post #: 47

RE: How long is to long to wait to meet r/t? - 11/1/2006 7:44:15 AM

MasterTonyS

Posts: 22
Joined: 10/2/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: toservez

Personally I cannot see a reason that is good enough for him not to have seen you. Seven hours away just is not far enough for most of the legit reasons that others have mentioned and experienced. Unless there is some very legit reason that you know of but have not shared. I cannot believe that you or him cannot afford to hop in a car and drive that and that niether of you have had a weekend off or two other days or even met half way.

Respect is a two way street and him making you jump through hoops like this when it seems that you have done plenty and communicated your need to see him in real time. Like Juliaoceania said if your needs are not being met then you need to fix that one way or the other and quite frankly if this person cannot take your needs and desires into consideration you are probably better off without him. There is just something way wrong here. Sorry for being so blunt.

That's the whole thing in a nutshell. Speaking personally, I have met a few people here after spending a number of weeks talking and after a couple of days. There are also a few whom I have yet to meet because of either distance or an economic issue or work committments, etc.

What it comes down to is that you need to decide whether or not He's really interested in you for real, or if you're just an online distraction for him.

My thought? He's a player. Drop him...

_____________________________

Giggity-giggity, Giggity goo...

All Right...

(in reply to toservez)

Post #: 48

RE: How long is to long to wait to meet r/t? - 11/1/2006 10:06:54 AM

popeye1250

Posts: 18104
Joined: 1/27/2006
From: New Hampshire
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: toservez

Theoretical answer: What two people are comfortable with.

Realisitical answer: Sooner than later if the people are serious. Measured more in weeks then months.

My guess in your situation: Married person having fun on the Internet.

I agree with toserve. If the guy doesn't want to meet he's married or has a girlfriend.
If, after two months they don't want to meet (Male or Female) you should cut off contact.
Two months is a very reasonable time for anyone.
Move on.

(in reply to toservez)

Post #: 49

RE: How long is to long to wait to meet r/t? - 11/1/2006 10:18:14 AM

amuzingtoyou

Posts: 144
Joined: 6/27/2006
Status: offline

i have a hard time understanding how you can call someone your "master" that you have never met. What is it exactly he is a master of? I wish you luck on this as i am sure your heart is invested in this relationship. However, if soemone is not willing to meet you after a year of courtship...he is either hiding something or isn't real. You have to earn it? That is a bunch of bull...cut your losses and learn from this experience. I truly do wish you luck.
missi.

(in reply to MasterNdorei)

Post #: 50

RE: How long is to long to wait to meet r/t? - 11/1/2006 11:19:43 AM

kisshou

Posts: 2425
Joined: 2/11/2005
Status: offline

for me two weeks is too long

(in reply to Imsosly4u)

Post #: 51

RE: How long is to long to wait to meet r/t? - 11/1/2006 1:06:19 PM

ExSteelAgain

Posts: 1803
Joined: 7/2/2006
From: Georgia
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: amuzingtoyou

i have a hard time understanding how you can call someone your "master" that you have never met. What is it exactly he is a master of? I wish you luck on this as i am sure your heart is invested in this relationship. However, if soemone is not willing to meet you after a year of courtship...he is either hiding something or isn't real. You have to earn it? That is a bunch of bull...cut your losses and learn from this experience. I truly do wish you luck.
missi.

You wouldn't think it, but this starts lots of debates. Some of our esteemed posters are into this. (I'm don't claim to be an esteemed one, if there was any doubt.)

_____________________________

You can paint a cinder block bright pastel pink, but it's still a cinder block. (By Me.)

(in reply to amuzingtoyou)

Post #: 52

RE: How long is to long to wait to meet r/t? - 11/1/2006 1:11:52 PM

BlkTallFullfig

Posts: 5585
Joined: 6/25/2004
Status: offline

I think you're being played for a fool, and have wasted a year of your life on someone who is probably married and has no intention of leaving his situation to dominate/have a relationship with you.
One year is way too long to wait and see if you and someone else have the goods to make it in a relationship... Very hard to believe you are this patient at 39... I stopped investing one year or more on anyone with whom my needs were not being met, because time is precious. M

_____________________________

a.k.a. SexyBossyBBW
""Touching was, and still is, and will always be, the true revolution" Nikki Giovanni

(in reply to Imsosly4u)

Post #: 53

RE: How long is to long to wait to meet r/t? - 11/1/2006 2:18:49 PM

crouchingtigress

Posts: 4387
Joined: 3/19/2006
From: Maui
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Imsosly4ui have tried to speak to Him about this and get frustrated, and it seems that when i get real honest about my feelings
it doesn't make Him too happy,

this is the calling card of a player.

after all if he really was that into you, wouldnt he care about your frustration and pain?

yes he does care about you, but not as much as he cares for himself, and couple that with honesty not being a comfy place for him to go with you....adds up to....well you do the math.

_____________________________

Service slut, durable plaything, and ponypenquincatdogpig, to Lee Harrington

This is him

"Its none of my buisness what other people think of me."

(in reply to Imsosly4u)

Post #: 54

RE: How long is to long to wait to meet r/t? - 11/1/2006 3:09:05 PM

akisha

Posts: 2071
Joined: 6/25/2005
Status: offline

It took Sir and myself 6 weeks to meet but that had to do with job scheduling and babysitters, not that we didn't want to. He also lives about 7 hours from me. We met for lunch in a town half way, so that there was no pressure. Breakfast was nice too *g*

I've found that if you haven't met in under 6 months chances are you never will. There is always an exception to the rule but still.

Good luck

_____________________________

I'm confused.... No wait!!! Maybe I'm not

It's not a blonde moment! It's momentary peroxide posioning. ;)

Your pain makes me smile ~ Happy Bunny

532-095-649

(in reply to crouchingtigress)

Post #: 55

RE: How long is to long to wait to meet r/t? - 11/1/2006 3:50:24 PM

orfunboi

Posts: 1223
Joined: 10/22/2005
Status: offline

Turn off your computer, go out into the real world and meet some real people. Your in California...there are munches and clubs all over.

(in reply to Imsosly4u)

Post #: 56

RE: How long is to long to wait to meet r/t? - 11/1/2006 5:38:47 PM

Windygal

Posts: 57
Joined: 8/17/2004
Status: offline

got one word for ya MARRIED I usually meet someone for a casual meet fairly soon, with in the first month or so of chatting, not to play just to meet.Good luck

Miss Diane

(in reply to MistressCamille)

Post #: 57

RE: How long is to long to wait to meet r/t? - 12/8/2007 1:52:20 AM

GoddessTeaze

Posts: 1125
Joined: 10/14/2006
From: The Netherlands
Status: offline

Why cant I find your profile anymore ?

A true Dom/me seeks real life, and wouldn't want to too long
to look the otherone in the eye, and see where
that would lead. So don't let them play with you girl!

Goodluck & warm greetingz

GoddezzT`

_____________________________

~* The only disability in life is a bad attitude. ~Scott Hamilton*~

~*Beauty is not in the face; beauty is a light in the heart. ~Kahlil Gibran*~

(in reply to Imsosly4u)

Post #: 58

RE: How long is to long to wait to meet r/t? - 12/8/2007 1:55:10 AM

laurell3

Posts: 6577
Joined: 5/5/2005
Status: offline

Probably because the post is from October. Just a word of warning, "true Dom/me"s don't go over well on these forums. There is no one answer that applies to all. We are an incredibly varied and somewhat schizo group like that.

_____________________________

I cannot be defined by moments in my life, but must be considered for by the entirety of my existence.

When you fail to consider that I am the best judge for what is right for me, all of your opinions become suspect to me.

(in reply to GoddessTeaze)

Post #: 59

RE: How long is to long to wait to meet r/t? - 12/8/2007 2:02:39 AM

Jill805

Posts: 83
Joined: 4/3/2006
Status: offline

Do you have his home phone number and can call him at anytime day or night? Full address etc. If the answer to any of those is no, then you are getting the run around - sorry!

(in reply to laurell3)

Post #: 60

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