Fakers? (Full Version)

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mysteryshopper -> Fakers? (10/24/2006 1:18:22 AM)

I think I just met a faker.  It seems any time I see a girl with a hot picture she has no way of vertification and doesn't want to go on her cam "cause it's broken"
Sound familiar?




gillybean -> RE: Fakers? (10/24/2006 2:03:47 AM)

If she seemed genuine up to that point and wasn't ready to go that far on a first contact do you think that slapping the 'faker' sticker on her is the way to go?
 
From what you've said i'd be more concerned about two things:
1. She admitted she's only looking to tease people.
2. You said 'i'm all yours' to her if she would go on cam.
 
I refuse to go on cam when someone first contacts me and no longer send further photos the second they are requested but wait until i feel comfortable and ready to do so.  People that demand it of me are just hng's who want to get off asap and are not actually interested in getting to know me imo.  For me thos kinds of people are also far more interested in image and appearance then most admit to being, especially if all they want to see is if you match up to your pictures rather than getting to know you as a person.
 
How could someone be 'all yours' based on the strength of a couple of seconds of web cam.  Why would you say such a thing and in what context?  That's got to sound alarm bells in anyones head don't you think?  And that's not going to make her want to send you anything if she doubts you are genuine yourself!
 
Did you take the time to explain why you wanted it so much, and did you take the time to hear her answers as to why she wasn't happy doing it and when she might be happier to consider it?
 
Yes of course there's fakers out there, and you don't want to be caught out and strung along.  Who does!?  But some people are not looking for instant gratification.  They are looking for a partner or a ltr and a building of trust.  People like that (like me) need a bit of time and have been burnt too many times themselves here by hng and others of that ilk.  Is that what she was looking for too, is that what you said you were looking for?
 
You haven't said what kind of contact this was.  You haven't said whether you contacted her or she contacted you.  You haven't said if her profile was compatible with what you were looking for.  You haven't said if you both wanted just a bit of online flirting and teasing or if either/both of you were looking for something more.
 
I used to hate to upset people so would never come right out and say i wasn't interested in them.  Now i just tell them straight, because i learnt that if i don't they take it to mean i am interested when i try and be polite and let them down gently.  They simply won't go away!
 
If you're not prepared to listen and take it at a pace that suits you both then you're the one who's going to loose out.  Did you put your own cam on for her first without demanding she do the same or expecting it be reciprocated?  If not why not?  If you did i hope you were sitting there wearing some clothes and not naked and ready for action (joke btw).
 
There are other ways of verifying that someone is genuine apart from cam.  Would you have been prepared to give her a phone number so she can call to verify you?  If she's happy sending photos could you not ask for a photo with a copy of a recent publication (newspaper/magazine), or wearing a specific colour t-shirt or item of clothing, or holding something you've asked for that she wouldn't normally have in a picture, (like an umbrella indoors or a box of breakfast cereal or something along those lines).
 
Personally i would never consider putting on my cam (even for a brief second) until someone has made some time and effort introducing themself to me with emails of significant length, and until i feel comfortable that this may go somewhere and feel i want to know that person better.  If you can't negotiate at this point on this then that won't lead her to believe you are going to negotiate in the future and make her feel safe to open up to you a bit more.
 
So consider the fact that she may have just been reluctant to allow another hng for the very reasons you demanded it so much.  A genuine person won't back you into a corner and make demands when he barely knows you imo.  If he does he screams of faker himself to me.  So if you think she is a fake now ask yourself what she thinks of you.
 
Give her a chance and some time.  If you still think fake after a week or so and you have put some effort into getting to know her and letting her get to know you and there seems to be compatibility then it's something to consider.  But don't assume it at an initial contact.
 
These are just my brief thoughts and opinions based on my own experiences here! 
 




gillybean -> RE: Fakers? (10/24/2006 2:07:47 AM)

You edited your message now to take out some of the detail you had before.  So now i'll get slated for making assumptions because others won't see what you had there before...  Guess i'll remember to reply using the quote option in future!




MistressDiane -> RE: Fakers? (10/24/2006 2:10:12 AM)

I seldom, ever, turn my cam on. For the most part it's for those I've already met and know and even then there's a slim chance. If I already know you then there's really no point. If I don't and there is compatibility I'd much rather speak by phone then set up a meet.




SirLordTrainer -> RE: Fakers? (10/24/2006 6:17:16 AM)

your post may be pulled, this board is for Introductions only. Not slamming folks because your concerned whether someone is fake or not. Oh and welcome to the CM Forum




toservez -> RE: Fakers? (10/24/2006 9:16:20 AM)

Oh the wonderful fake word! There is a very natural reaction to a person who insist on imediate things like webcam or phone within the first few communications to verify "realness". I think many times people think the person is fake if they do not agree to it and end communication. Personally I do not think you would be able to tell, because I think it is a very natural reaction for a legit person to say bye bye to a person who basically has insulted them by questioning their motives and "realness". Just make a person so warm and fuzzy to have someone question your sincerity, especially a total stranger who I  know nothing about.





Elegrea -> RE: Fakers? (10/24/2006 10:19:18 AM)

Real people know giving out personal information like phone numbers to strangers they've just met on the net is not only dumb, but dangerous.

I tell people who want me to webcam or phone with them right away to take a hike. No matter their motive, they come across as HNG's, and give me the creeps.
My telephone number is no one's business but my own.




windchymes -> RE: Fakers? (10/24/2006 12:57:03 PM)

Yes, anyone who doesn't do what you want them to do upon first introduction is a faker.  And yes, there are a lot of fakers in CM.   Don't confuse them with wannabe's who simply don't wannabe with YOU.




ToGiveDivine -> RE: Fakers? (10/24/2006 1:04:20 PM)

I recently got an email from a Domme close by that said we had many interests alike in our profiles - I read through our profiles and I wasn't seeing a match.

This is a serious woman wanting an experienced sub who is advanced in the knowledge of the lifestyle - I'm a newbie.

I wrote, what I thought, was a nice note back and she got annoyed and made some comment to the effect of that if I just jumped in I'd quickly get passed my reservations.

At first I reread what I sent to see if I came across as a faker and then I just realized that we aren't compatible at this time and she was annoyed I didn't just say, "Yes, whatever you want".

I don't even know if I'm cut out for the lifestyle, if I'm a true sub (even though I feel that way) or if I could be too strong willed to make anything work.

I don't want to waste anyone's time and at the same time I don't want to get in over my head too quickly.

I don't see too much in the way of middle ground either.




Kirei -> RE: Fakers? (10/24/2006 1:11:21 PM)

   Phone can be a good thing if your willing to take a few precautions to build trust.  One if I call I use a calling card to the person.    If they didn't like it then I ended it.  If they insisted on calling me, I used a payphone number near me and specific time to call.  That way there is no way to trace the first call and they don't have my number so if they said something that put up a red flag they wouldn't have my number either.  Being female one needs to take precautions, but if the person is real and serious there are ways of building that trust with someone.
   I use the golden rule.  So as I would like to check out someone to be sure, I am also willing for them to check me out as well.

Koneko




amlonging -> RE: Fakers? (10/24/2006 1:25:47 PM)

I KNOW ONE WHO SELF ADMITTEDLYS AID SHE WAS A "WANNABE"
...nothing changes her behavior,she seems proud of herself.




LaTigresse -> RE: Fakers? (10/24/2006 1:28:23 PM)

Internet 101




eyesopened -> RE: Fakers? (10/24/2006 1:50:22 PM)

i am probably the last person on the planet who doesn't own a webcam  so i must be fake also LOL.... besides, most of the time i'm on the computer is when i first get up in the morning and who wants to see a really bad case of  bed-head.  Or should i just call it the "just ravished" look?  i am also wary of guys who ask for pictures right off the bat without ever having one of themselves or willing to post one here.




mkswing -> RE: Fakers? (10/24/2006 2:12:43 PM)

maybe she does not want to talk to you online. you dont have to be like that. come on.




cuddleheart50 -> RE: Fakers? (10/24/2006 2:16:51 PM)

I dont have a cam, and I'm not going to buy one, thats my excuse and I'm sticking to it.[:D]




siamsa24 -> RE: Fakers? (10/24/2006 2:25:02 PM)

I don't have a web cam either, and I am not planning on getting one.  I don't think that I have to "prove" anything to anyone.
I have had people say nasty things about and to me because I will not send nude pictures, get a web cam or talk on the phone.  I am not a faker, I just don't give those things out to just anyone.




Triumpho -> RE: Fakers? (12/27/2006 3:15:08 PM)

Wiltswitch is really a fake person. In her profile she's a girl, but that's not true!
I'm not stupid




mgdartist -> RE: Fakers? (12/27/2006 4:09:10 PM)

sigh, been here done this. I will happily get on cam for a minute or 2 so that the person I'm talking to knows I'm for real. No need for nudity, pressure, barking orders, or undue risk. A cam has a way of confirming you are who you say, making your identity virtually unassailable. This in an online personals site, and I'm sorry but a cam should be standard equipment. If youre discourteous enough not to get on one, or not get on one, for pretty much any reason(since they're only ($20-30)
I merely give you a rating of "2w"

If you ever have a good poser mess with your head, you too will feel it's your right in this scenario, and if you really get screwed badly, you won't even bother sayin "f off" before you click the little x on em. Without an initial cam intro, this all is similar to a blind date with a rabid ape.
Sure you might decide to still show, but you may as well start callin' yourself dumbass.
Think about it. Far as I'm concerned, I WANT the person on the other end to have that assurance. Why anyone wouldn't is completely beyond my scope of understanding.





LTRsubNW -> RE: Fakers? (12/27/2006 4:38:07 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: mysteryshopper

I think I just met a faker.  It seems any time I see a girl with a hot picture she has no way of vertification and doesn't want to go on her cam "cause it's broken"
Sound familiar?



You're a mystery shopper...by definition, you're a faker.

What are you asking?




Aileen68 -> RE: Fakers? (12/27/2006 4:40:36 PM)

*fast reply*

Fuck...if I was fake I'd be about nine inches taller and a lot skinnier.




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