I am Jack's Rookie Questions (Full Version)

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion



Message

Paradoxy -> I am Jack's Rookie Questions (10/23/2006 9:22:24 PM)

What would (if there is such a thing) a universal red-flag be?

One reason I ask is I've been talking to a possible Sub...the only problem is she terrifies me a little, and I'm not sure if its because I'm green or if she's...out there.



Level -> RE: I am Jack's Rookie Questions (10/23/2006 9:44:35 PM)

Hi, Jack. [8|].... hm. If she asks you to do things you feel are wrong, or dangerous, take a step back, or run. Seriously, if you are "green", don't feel bad about taking things slow in order to figure out if she's just veddddy kinky, not for you, or nuts. Don't endanger yourself, or others. Not sure about a universal red flag, because what may freak you out could be run of the mill for someone else.
 
Dismemberment, maybe that one.....



MistressTexas -> RE: I am Jack's Rookie Questions (10/23/2006 9:55:51 PM)

How about asking for money right off the bat. That seems to be pretty par for the course as far as flags go. Just take it slow sweetie. The one whos right for you won't fault you for taking it at your own pace.



Owned1 -> RE: I am Jack's Rookie Questions (10/23/2006 10:01:37 PM)

The best flag you can go by is your own instincts, your gut feeling.  This is no different than anyother walk of life.  If you met someone in a bar and got a bad feeling about them would you exchange numbers, plan to meet again, go home with them?  I think not.  The power exchange dynamic is no different.

Have fun take it slow and dont be pushed into something you do not want to do.

Owned



Paradoxy -> RE: I am Jack's Rookie Questions (10/23/2006 10:01:51 PM)

Ok, well...here's an example of what I mean:

(God, I hope this doesn't count as a "bad post") She refers to when her father started molesting her at the age of 14 as "getting closer" with her father, asked me why I never slept with my own sister, and...other...things.

Beyond things like that, I'm fine with her.  There seems to be cards missing out of the deck.



SweetSarijane -> RE: I am Jack's Rookie Questions (10/23/2006 10:12:26 PM)

I'd tread very carefully with that one based on what you said. If that's throwing up a red flag (and it sounds as though it is) it's probably not a match for you.



Morrigel -> RE: I am Jack's Rookie Questions (10/23/2006 10:14:50 PM)

This is the part where I prove I'm enlightened and tolerant by not making a face like this [:'(].

Right?

(rl incest, ew)
 
Right.

--M



SweetSarijane -> RE: I am Jack's Rookie Questions (10/23/2006 10:16:47 PM)

It would definitely be a huge red flag for me and bye bye to that one [:'(]



Paradoxy -> RE: I am Jack's Rookie Questions (10/23/2006 10:18:14 PM)

I'm telling you...crazy women are like flys to sugar with me.

...in return I have a tendancy to encourage them.



Morrigel -> RE: I am Jack's Rookie Questions (10/23/2006 10:22:16 PM)

Oh, everybody's crazy, hon.  Life is just one big mental institution.  The question is, which patients do I want to play checkers with?  A gal's got to have standards.

--M



Arpig -> RE: I am Jack's Rookie Questions (10/23/2006 10:39:53 PM)

Universal red flag???
Maybe loading the shotgun, or frothing at the mouth?



Emperor1956 -> RE: I am Jack's Rookie Questions (10/23/2006 10:40:13 PM)

You already got the squicky feeling, guy.  Step Wayyyyy back.  R/l Nonconsensual incest is a flag for most people.  I'm curious, tho.  How much contact have you had with her?  Phone calls?  Anything approaching "real life"?  Because nonconsensual incest stories are also a fetish for a "select" few around here, and that might be a big old HNG guy you are feverishly emailing with.

Good luck.

E.

(by saying "select few" I'm being nice, OK?)



Paradoxy -> RE: I am Jack's Rookie Questions (10/23/2006 11:03:54 PM)

I have confirmation of the gendar and age.



bandit25 -> RE: I am Jack's Rookie Questions (10/24/2006 3:43:14 AM)

If you're even a bit weirded out, then I'd find someone else to char with.  Being new, you're going to be feeling your way, have tons of questions, etc.  No need to add a negative feeling to the mix.



Level -> RE: I am Jack's Rookie Questions (10/24/2006 4:33:47 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Paradoxy

Ok, well...here's an example of what I mean:

(God, I hope this doesn't count as a "bad post") She refers to when her father started molesting her at the age of 14 as "getting closer" with her father, asked me why I never slept with my own sister, and...other...things.

Beyond things like that, I'm fine with her.  There seems to be cards missing out of the deck.


So, family is important to her..... [X(]........... there's another thread on here, started by a female, that admits she is turned on by "reliving" her sexual abuse. *shrugs*......... if it turns your stomach, move on.



twicehappy -> RE: I am Jack's Rookie Questions (10/24/2006 4:33:53 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Paradoxy

She refers to when her father started molesting her at the age of 14 as "getting closer" with her father, asked me why I never slept with my own sister,


Here's your sign....



Silvermoon -> RE: I am Jack's Rookie Questions (10/24/2006 4:56:05 AM)

Dude run like hell's hounds are on your heels!
 
For future reference if you have to ask this question THAT IS THE RED FLAG!



MistressWolfen -> RE: I am Jack's Rookie Questions (10/24/2006 5:27:09 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Arpig
Maybe loading the shotgun, or frothing at the mouth?



ahhhhh good ole northern foreplay *smiles whilst fondly recalling past exploits* and wipes froth from corners of mouth



Paradoxy -> RE: I am Jack's Rookie Questions (10/24/2006 6:13:43 AM)

Well, thanks for confirming what I already knew. 

Instincts I can trust.  My own judgement?  Hardly.



onestandingstill -> RE: I am Jack's Rookie Questions (10/24/2006 6:16:18 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Paradoxy

What would (if there is such a thing) a universal red-flag be?

One reason I ask is I've been talking to a possible Sub...the only problem is she terrifies me a little, and I'm not sure if its because I'm green or if she's...out there.

Hi There,
Universal red flags to me would be the feeling in your gut when you know something puts the hairs on the back of your neck up.
Sometimes it means stop and reevaluate and sometimes it means turn and run.
Deciphering between the two well is the key.
suzanne



Page: [1] 2 3   next >   >>

Valid CSS!




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy
0.03125