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WhipTheHip -> RE: What does "soft" mean to you? (10/19/2006 6:38:44 PM)
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> "I see that you are, indeed, a strong person. you are obviously 'already whole and complete'.
> I admire your independence, but it makes me sad. I am looking for someone soft. Someone
> who is not yet complete, and wants to find another to complete her. I want someone who
> needs me, because I know that I need them."
The above paragraph is something I could have written. With apologies to Sammy Davis Jr.,
"People who need people are the luckiest people of all." We are each entilted to our tastes.
I am not looking to find someone to rescue and make my partner. I do rescue people and
animals all the time. I don't call anyone "broken" or "in need of fixing." These are
condescending words used by others here to put me down. Neither am I looking for somone
who is independant, happy by themselves, not in need of others and in need of lots of
personal space.
I have little interest in people who lean towards the schizoidal, narcissistic end of the
spectrum. Human beings are social creatures. Healthy human beings need others.
The worst thing you can do to most people is put them in soliitary confinement.
In my view, people who love themselves are sick. I believe a happy medium
exists between low self-esteem and high self-esteem. A lot of people here though
only see things in terms of black and white. As a result they think self-love is
the only alternative to low self-esteem. I neither love myself nor hate myself
and seek others with the same feeling.
i would like to find someone who compliments me, who has strengths where
I have weaknesses and vice versa. I understand there are a lot of perfect
people here who don't need anyone to compliment them because they are
whole, complete and perfect as they are. Their need for others is merely
icing on the cake. If a relationship comes and works out fine. But if not,
that too is okay. They are never lonely because they always have
themselves to talk to, and they talk to themselves quite often.
"Soft" in this context means someone who is pliant, easy-going,
flexible, soft-spoken, kind, giving, not hard, obdurate, stubborn,
rough, insensitive, aggressive, unforgiving, harsh, judgmental,
selff-righteious, arrogant, independant. bossy.
Margret from "Dennis the Mennis" was not soft.
When you lose $50,000 in a day, the soft female will say,
"Come let me make things better for you." While the hard
female will say, "Why do you look so dejected, do you
want a pity party."
Some females will say, "I need you. your approval means
everything to me." Others females will say, "I don't need
a relationship, or anyone to make me happy. All I need is
a good book and a vibrator, and I'm complete." The first
female is soft, the second is hard. Some females derive
pleasure from emotionally abusing others. Some men
also fall into this category. They are filled with snarky
comments and enjoy scratching people's eyes out. They
rarely have anything positive to say. All they can do is
criticize, and put others down. They have little interest
in helping others.
Cheers,
Michael
Cheers,
Michael
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