ratios of men to women (Full Version)

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hsagnev -> ratios of men to women (10/13/2006 9:42:37 AM)

I've tried online dating a couple of time over the years and have come to the conclusion that the ratio of men to women is quite high (perhaps something on the order of 100 men to 1 women).  I'm guessing the rations are also high here on CM however I did run into something interesting.   About four to five months ago I got into a really long conversation with a young woman on CM who was a submissive. We even talked over the phone an entire night talking about damn near everything.  At some point the subject of these ratios came up and I was quite surprised to learn that for her, a submissive, she has a ton of submissive guys contacting her looking for a dom, but she was really looking for a master.  This is just one person's account so who knows maybe she had her profile set up incorrectly or something, but if it is true then that would tend to suggest there are far more submissive men on CM than there are dominate.   Interesting.




juliaoceania -> RE: ratios of men to women (10/13/2006 9:48:20 AM)

There are far more submissive men than dominant men from what I have heard. There are more submissive women than domme women.




Kirei -> RE: ratios of men to women (10/13/2006 9:53:56 AM)

Actually its more like 1000 men to every 1 women....because you have to figure that maybe 60% of the female ads could be men too.




Master96 -> RE: ratios of men to women (10/13/2006 10:06:08 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: juliaoceania

There are far more submissive men than dominant men from what I have heard. There are more submissive women than domme women.


waw..... most of the human race is submissive! Interesting...




hsagnev -> RE: ratios of men to women (10/13/2006 10:08:01 AM)

I think any dating site will have such ratios for whatever the reason.  It's an internet thing I guess.




LotusSong -> RE: ratios of men to women (10/13/2006 10:09:12 AM)

10 men to 1 woman..
 
and I wonder why it's the GUY's that always want a stable of women.  Seems the supply and demand would warrant the WOMAN to keep a gaggle of guys :)




LadyEllen -> RE: ratios of men to women (10/13/2006 10:15:00 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LotusSong

10 men to 1 woman..
 
and I wonder why it's the GUY's that always want a stable of women.  Seems the supply and demand would warrant the WOMAN to keep a gaggle of guys :)


Crikey - one man is quite enough trouble for most I think! LOL!
E




LadyEllen -> RE: ratios of men to women (10/13/2006 10:17:34 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: hsagnev

I've tried online dating a couple of time over the years and have come to the conclusion that the ratio of men to women is quite high (perhaps something on the order of 100 men to 1 women).  I'm guessing the rations are also high here on CM however I did run into something interesting.   About four to five months ago I got into a really long conversation with a young woman on CM who was a submissive. We even talked over the phone an entire night talking about damn near everything.  At some point the subject of these ratios came up and I was quite surprised to learn that for her, a submissive, she has a ton of submissive guys contacting her looking for a dom, but she was really looking for a master.  This is just one person's account so who knows maybe she had her profile set up incorrectly or something, but if it is true then that would tend to suggest there are far more submissive men on CM than there are dominate.   Interesting.


Yup. A woman can post a profile that says she's only interested in a relationship with a cardboard box, and she'll still get dozens of enquiries from het males!

E




Kirei -> RE: ratios of men to women (10/13/2006 10:21:51 AM)

  Its easy to figure out why there are more guys than women on sites.  Look at some of the photos you see.  Guys think finding women is like fishing....you throw out the worm and wait to get a bite.   At least thats the only conclusion I can come too from all the little worm pictures guys are willing to show you....I guess thats what watching all those sport channels does to you over the years.
LOL

Koneko




Amaros -> RE: ratios of men to women (10/13/2006 10:22:56 AM)

Well, you also have the cyber dom cruise throughs looking for random action, but generally it reflects a difference between men and women: for any given Ten males and Tens females, at least Eight of those males are going to hit on every female regardless, whereas a few number of the females are going to hit on every male.

When you can alter your identity and try again, the odds get even screwier: 10 males could easily multiply into a hundred or more virtual Doms.[:D]




Kirei -> RE: ratios of men to women (10/13/2006 10:27:15 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyEllen

Yup. A woman can post a profile that says she's only interested in a relationship with a cardboard box, and she'll still get dozens of enquiries from het males!

E



  I wonder if you did do this on collarme if they would let you keep the profile up?  This just makes me so curious to try something like this and see the results.

Koneko




Rover -> RE: ratios of men to women (10/13/2006 10:39:54 AM)

You may be interested to know that Trevor Jacques has conducted extensive real time surveys (if I recall correctly, 1400 questions per survey) that reveal more women are lifestylers than men, and more submissives than Dominants.
 
He's a trained statistician, and currently in the process of compiling the data to ascertain trends amongst lifestylers.  I saw some of the raw data at an event in Toronto earlier this year, and it's really quite interesting. 
 
John




MisPandora -> RE: ratios of men to women (10/13/2006 10:44:56 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Rover

You may be interested to know that Trevor Jacques has conducted extensive real time surveys (if I recall correctly, 1400 questions per survey) that reveal more women are lifestylers than men, and more submissives than Dominants.
 
He's a trained statistician, and currently in the process of compiling the data to ascertain trends amongst lifestylers.  I saw some of the raw data at an event in Toronto earlier this year, and it's really quite interesting. 
 
John

I took that survey when I was up visiting Toronto and Trevor caught me visiting some of his friends.  I felt like I was taking a certification exam!




Rover -> RE: ratios of men to women (10/13/2006 10:57:50 AM)

I intended to take the survey (of course, the road to hell is paved with good intentions) but did not find the time. 
 
Good to see you again, Pandora.  We met at TOKink, and again at Ms & Mr World Leather in Philadelphia.
 
John




hsagnev -> RE: ratios of men to women (10/13/2006 11:02:32 AM)

online dating in any form (in my opinion) is just not the place to look - I gave up years ago.  I do like message boards though just for general chat and whatnot.  

I'll just throw this out there:  I think the reason there are so many guys to women illustrates how lustful and visual we tend to be and the internet is nothing more than a magnet for guys looking for playboy model pictures whereas women just think differently (or just think perhaps?) and tend not to troll as much.  Of course I could be dead wrong - it's just a guess based on experience though ;-] 





toservez -> RE: ratios of men to women (10/13/2006 11:55:37 AM)

I think there are many people who go online, go online as a way to try to improve what they think they can get or want then what they have been getting in real life. A guy all of a sudden now thinks he can get the playboy model. The woman now thinks she can get the doctor or lawyer. Online hides the imperfections and highlights the assets maybe to false levels.

That is fascinating about that survey if it is true because clearly online it appears to be a 10 to 1 ratio for this life, but I do feel for vanilla sites that the ratio is much more even. I do think one of the reasons there are more men online is that guys are more solitary and more brain before heart and online works for this, while women enjoy being in groups and the interest/flirting process is much better in person then cyber. Like shopping for most. Guys go in find exactly what they want buy and leave. Women it is more of an event.





hsagnev -> RE: ratios of men to women (10/13/2006 12:19:04 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: toservez

I think there are many people who go online, go online as a way to try to improve what they think they can get or want then what they have been getting in real life. A guy all of a sudden now thinks he can get the playboy model. The woman now thinks she can get the doctor or lawyer. Online hides the imperfections and highlights the assets maybe to false levels.


I truly believe that's the common mistake made by many online.  Years ago I tried online dating (vanilla sites)  so did a few male friends of mine at work, but we all came to the same conclusion, it just doesn't work (not if you're a guy anyway and don't look like Brad Pit or whatever).   A bit discouraging I suppose, but then again its just the internet and can't always be taken seriously. 

Anyway, yes I agree peoples' expectation online seem to be unrealistically high - but what do I know I'm just an average guy.

quote:

ORIGINAL: toservez
That is fascinating about that survey if it is true because clearly online it appears to be a 10 to 1 ratio for this life, but I do feel for vanilla sites that the ratio is much more even. I do think one of the reasons there are more men online is that guys are more solitary and more brain before heart and online works for this, while women enjoy being in groups and the interest/flirting process is much better in person then cyber. Like shopping for most. Guys go in find exactly what they want buy and leave. Women it is more of an event.

Yeah, isn't that the dichotomy here?  Guys get used to being alone so everything they do tends to focus on solitary activities to entertain themselves yet they need and crave companionship making those activities non-conducive for that purpose, yet swingers are a turn off for many and simply do not fit everyone’s personality. 




Iskander -> RE: ratios of men to women (10/13/2006 1:13:22 PM)

Don't ya know that 67% of all statistics are made up.. [:D]

Iskander...





sophia37 -> RE: ratios of men to women (10/13/2006 1:24:57 PM)

I dont know. I met my man on line. So one man and one women were successful. Outside of that I cant say. If anything I was the one who played it like shopping not him. I picked from the many. He sort of had only the few. In a way, he had the better experience. He met 3 other women I had to wade thru 160. I had the harder job I think.




toservez -> RE: ratios of men to women (10/13/2006 1:30:43 PM)

Personally I have to disagree that online is worse then real life when it comes to finding someone. Now certainly for people in their youth I do agree but that is because the young social life is one big opportunity to meet other single people that have similar interest. As you get older and friends get permanently paired up there is less and less social time and far less social time that involves single people in the same place. Parties I go to now are 90% plus with married or coupled off people and I have to be dragged to a bar. For the most part it leaves the workplace and random events. To me online if done right and not thru rose colored glasses can be legit place.

The problem with online in addition to self idealization is that people do not adjust for the difference in the medium. Too many men treat it like a cyber bar and a profile and message are nothing more then first lines and a message equals I have you cornered and now you have to talk to me and then we can really find out something about each other, while women are having to choose who they can talk to more so then if they will talk to you and most men just do not seem to get that. Women on the other hand, get spoiled from all the attention and become too picky and eliminate men for stupid reasons and rely too much on cyber when it is just a starting point and need to move more quicker to phone and live meetings.

But I am sorry but when you throw in M/s into the picture going online is to me a perfectly good option. Many people do not live in major cities where the local community is large and maybe more importantly diverse. I have lived in many places and there are always subtle differences that add up to some serious big differences. Throw in all the things you see on this message board every day like bottom/sub/slave, bedroom only, lifestyle, SM or not, 24/7 and whatever else the pool in local only is only so deep.

Do I think too many people are unrealistic or not properly prepared to do this online and/or long distance, yes, but I do not think it makes the medium without legitimate creditability either. It is a tool and like all tools it needs to be used properly.




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