RE: Attitude vs. Behavior (Full Version)

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion



Message

Steelriven -> RE: Attitude vs. Behavior (10/11/2006 8:49:37 AM)

Attitude... Why? I um... have been known to ah... er misbehave a little bit hehe. However, it's my attitude that counts on whether I am misbehaving or being a bitch, or need to adjust my attitude.

I do think you have to have a good attitude in order to serve. Hell it's good to be that way in general. Then again when I serve, it's more of because I want to, and he enjoys it. Not because I am being submissive.



becca333 -> RE: Attitude vs. Behavior (10/11/2006 9:38:20 AM)

A for attitude

B for behaviour

....how about

C for commitment?  I think that combines the other two.


...I'm imagining a BDSM alphabet book....



HalloweenWhite -> RE: Attitude vs. Behavior (10/11/2006 9:53:41 AM)

I think attitude is more important-if  a sub/slave is not 100 per cent about his/her orientation then they could slip up and behave in a way not conducive to submission,where as if they have the right attitude they will be much more aware of what they do day to day and care about being a slave or a sub that much more.......that's what I think anyway!.[:D]


                          HalloweenWhite.



diamonddreamlove -> RE: Attitude vs. Behavior (10/13/2006 8:58:34 PM)

If my attitude is not right my actions are not right either.  They may be the behavior that my Dom wants to see but not what He wants to feel and as such i will have failed to please Him.  And yes perhaps i could fake it but that is not honest and if i can't have an honest relationship with my Dom i need to move on because something in the relationship has gone wrong.



MasterNdorei -> RE: Attitude vs. Behavior (10/13/2006 9:40:02 PM)

This thread is very like a similar one i read somwehere.... which is better: surrender or obedience?

i believe each serves a purpose.

One who is able to surrender internally has a better attitude, but might also have difficulties in complying when the given task is a challenge.

Obedience is a wonderful thing, especially when one is challenged internally, and can still carry out the given task.

A good combination might be to offer obedience during the times we are unable to naturally surrender, but be equally committed to maintaining a pleasing attitude regardless?

Humbly,
Master's dorei



KnightofMists -> RE: Attitude vs. Behavior (10/14/2006 2:50:55 PM)

Attitude wins hands down in my book...

With the right attitude... I can effect the behaviors I want and desire


but changing attitude is a slow and sometimes painful process.



slavejali -> RE: Attitude vs. Behavior (10/14/2006 3:02:25 PM)

I think both are equally important.

People can have a "concept" which effects their attitude but when it all comes down to it, they need to be able to "apply".

I know being a water sign, sometimes just by thinking or feeling something I think I've already done it (Lotsa idealistic thoughts etc, dreamy floaty kinda person). Application is an earthy concept to me and takes hard work and constant attention.

So basically as a slave, I need both of those things to work hand in hand...but to be honest I know I do rely in Master a lot to get me back to earth and do all those things that are in my mind and to help me apply my very best of intentions.




MASTERRocker -> RE: Attitude vs. Behavior (10/14/2006 3:08:16 PM)

It is possible to 'behave' well and appropriate; but your 'attitude' is still unbecoming and needing attention.



Daddysredhead -> RE: Attitude vs. Behavior (10/14/2006 7:14:52 PM)

Attitude is the most important as far as my Master and I are concerned.  If a person has a surly attitude but does everything you ask, it makes for a really tense atmosphere.  (Thinking of a bratty kid doing what they have been told, but being a real pain in the ass about it.)

My Master has asked me before if I need a few minutes to get myself  "in check" or if He needed to intervene.  I've surprised myself at how quickly I can snap back to being pleasant.  [;)]



LadyHugs -> RE: Attitude vs. Behavior (10/14/2006 7:58:16 PM)

Dear LeatherBentOne, Ladies and Gentlemen;
 
Attitude and good behavior are very important qualities.  However, the attitude influences behavior, so I see in my mind's eye; that the good attitude is the strong hand and behavior is the weak hand of which both do compliment each other when they join.
 
Respectfully submitted for consideration,
Lady Hugs



slavemaia -> RE: Attitude vs. Behavior (10/25/2006 6:13:12 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LeatherBentOne

Which do you think is a more important quality for a submissive or slave to possess, a good attitude toward serving or good behavior?

For me, I'm a believer that if one has a willing mind, they can be taught anything.  Good behavior without a good attitude to match makes it seem like a submissive or slave is just going through the motions and makes me wonder if service is as "selfless" as I prefer or if reward is the true motivation rather than the service.

Your thoughts?  Also, why do you think this way?

Thank you in advance for your answers.

LBO


Perhaps i'm unusual, but perhaps i'm just more realistic. i read posts of slaves/subs who say pleasing their Dom/Master is the be all and end all of everything. Ahem! Really? Well, i have some swampland for sale - Interested?
 
Okay, i know, i'm being sarcastic. The reason is that i'm human first - always was and always will be. my attitude and behavior change from day to day and there's really not much i can do about that. i can obey - sometimes i'm delighted, othertimes i'm not, but i can obey. So attitude is very dependent on many things for me - some of which have absolutely nothing to do with my Master.  When i'm struggling though i do go to Master for help - He has ways of adjusting my attitude.



TemptingNviceSub -> RE: Attitude vs. Behavior (10/25/2006 7:20:06 PM)

Attitude...the behavior follows when the dynamic is a good match...Tempting



Sinergy -> RE: Attitude vs. Behavior (10/25/2006 7:26:56 PM)

Who needs attitude or behavior when you have

(pause for emphasis)

duct tape.

Sinergy



ExtremeOwnerIL -> RE: Attitude vs. Behavior (10/26/2006 5:52:14 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LeatherBentOne

Which do you think is a more important quality for a submissive or slave to possess, a good attitude toward serving or good behavior?

Your thoughts?  Also, why do you think this way?

Thank you in advance for your answers.

LBO


Mindset is everything. As you say, without attitude, what does the behavior actually serve?

If someone has a good mindset, then they are open to possibilities and to the things that brought them to me in the first place. Being open means that the behaviors can be taught to them and they will respond.

I think this way from hard experience. I've been with a slave whose mindset was not matched with me, nor my mindset to her. The relationship was toxic and took me quite awhile to recover from. I've seen too many submissives of both genders have a mindset of "it's all about me"; their behavior was correct for the situation, but the energy - it wasn't a flow between two people, rather it was an energy sink.

Interesting question.
Regards,
EO



Kalira -> RE: Attitude vs. Behavior (10/26/2006 5:57:22 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Sinergy

Who needs attitude or behavior when you have

(pause for emphasis)

duct tape.

Sinergy

LMAO that is soooooooooo true.



Mistrix -> RE: Attitude vs. Behavior (10/26/2006 6:01:03 AM)

IMO I believe with a good attitude comes health.  How is my sub to have a good positive attitude, if he's sick, tired, lonely or angry about something that's where HALT comes in (hungry, angry, lonely, tired).  If all of those are replenished then I believe I will have a good behaving sub.  Communication is so important too.  Also with attitude comes gra titude.  If he feels grateful in our relatinship and with all of life around him I am bound to have a good boy.  That's just from experience. 



SirLordTrainer -> RE: Attitude vs. Behavior (10/26/2006 6:33:57 AM)

Im of the belief that a subslave should have both elements in order. Otherwise, Im like you in that I share the mindset that shes just 'going through the motions' which to Me is half-heartedness in their servitude in which case there is no reward.



agirl -> RE: Attitude vs. Behavior (10/26/2006 7:29:30 AM)

I don't often have to *serve* as such.....I have to do as I'm requested. My attitude to that is variable and so is my behaviour.

What sets this relationship apart from others that I've had is that I am not false.

I am free, really free to be myself and if I don't want to do something...it shows, if my attitude is crap, that shows too.........in past relationships, I'd hide that and *I* wasn't being honest; I was afraid to be honest.

In effect, my Master has got the worst of me but he's the one person that managed to get ALL of me.

I have MY attitude, sometimes it's clearly a good one, a positive and beneficial one and sometimes it's rather less than that.... ditto my behaviour.

Sometimes I DO *go through the motions* because I do NOT want to do things.....that's fine by him because at times ALL he wants is for me to do it, regardless. At those times he doesn't really care what my attitude is.

The way I regard my relationship, and my place within it, is what matters, overall........if my attitude, in that respect, was one of merely *doing what needs to be done*......that would also be very clear.

I'm not sure which is the better quality but I know that if a *better attitude OR better behaviour* is required, he's perfectly capable of ensuring that it occurs.

agirl





Page: <<   < prev  1 [2]

Valid CSS!




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy
3.076172E-02