RE: For those who believe....if there IS a second coming of Christ.... (Full Version)

All Forums >> [Casual Banter] >> Off the Grid



Message


LadyEllen -> RE: For those who believe....if there IS a second coming of Christ.... (9/30/2006 3:05:18 PM)

What is the medical evidence that a forty year old, under-nourished ascetic could come twice? I should be surprised if he had the ability, even if he had the will.....

Now, with all the religious people here out to get me........ (oo, chase me, chase me!), I'd say if Jesus did return, it would be as an African lesbian, whom the religious would denounce, just as they denounced him as a carpenter from the backwoods the last time. And therein lies his power to confound them.

I'm not Christian, but I'm pretty sure that if Jesus did return, many of us who have chosen a spiritual path and pursued it, will be far more welcoming of him, than most of the religious zealots who shout the loudest in our world today.

E




LadyMorgynn -> RE: For those who believe....if there IS a second coming of Christ.... (9/30/2006 3:23:31 PM)

To be fair, how do we know he *was* an under-nourished ascetic?  I mean, we know that's how the early Church (very much into asceticism and so forth) and their artists liked to portray him, and that image seems to have held over to modern times... but we don't know that's what he actually looked like.

:)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyEllen

What is the medical evidence that a forty year old, under-nourished ascetic could come twice? I should be surprised if he had the ability, even if he had the will.....
E




LadyMorgynn -> RE: For those who believe....if there IS a second coming of Christ.... (9/30/2006 3:25:21 PM)

Amen!

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyEllen
I'm not Christian, but I'm pretty sure that if Jesus did return, many of us who have chosen a spiritual path and pursued it, will be far more welcoming of him, than most of the religious zealots who shout the loudest in our world today.




LadyEllen -> RE: For those who believe....if there IS a second coming of Christ.... (9/30/2006 3:28:48 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyMorgynn

To be fair, how do we know he *was* an under-nourished ascetic?  I mean, we know that's how the early Church (very much into asceticism and so forth) and their artists liked to portray him, and that image seems to have held over to modern times... but we don't know that's what he actually looked like.

:)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyEllen

What is the medical evidence that a forty year old, under-nourished ascetic could come twice? I should be surprised if he had the ability, even if he had the will.....
E



True enough - although someone who spends 40 days and nights on a total fast in the desert could be described as ascetic I'd have thought, and many people who do that sort of thing dont generally return to society and indulge themselves overmuch.

In any case, it was meant to be contentious and a little humorous. It clearly succeeded in the first place, but failed miserably in the second.

E




LadyMorgynn -> RE: For those who believe....if there IS a second coming of Christ.... (9/30/2006 4:12:45 PM)

More my fault than yours... .I'm down with bronchitis and more inclined to be fussy <guilty smile>

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyEllen
In any case, it was meant to be contentious and a little humorous. It clearly succeeded in the first place, but failed miserably in the second.

E




Level -> RE: For those who believe....if there IS a second coming of Christ.... (9/30/2006 4:28:42 PM)

Evidently, he has allready came, and Immigration let him through:
 
He makes a remarkable claim: that he is the second coming of Jesus Christ.
 
Perhaps  equally remarkable, the number of people who believe him.
 
Now this man could be your neighbor and who says he’s Christ, has moved to Houston.
 
When members of Creciendo en Gracia had a worldwide meeting in Miami this weekend it had a Latin beat.
And when Jose Luis de Jesus Miranda entered the room with a security detail clearing his way, it could have been a rock star or a politician.  His style is a bit of both.
 
“I am the second coming of Christ, that messiah that they’ve been waiting for,” said Dr. Jose Luis de Jesus Miranda.

http://www.khou.com/topstories/stories/khou060928_cd_jesus.27af610a.html




missturbation -> RE: For those who believe....if there IS a second coming of Christ.... (9/30/2006 5:15:27 PM)

*giggles*
A second coming sounds good to me.




Level -> RE: For those who believe....if there IS a second coming of Christ.... (9/30/2006 5:16:27 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: missturbation

*giggles*
A second coming sounds good to me.


No giggling or coming! [8D]




missturbation -> RE: For those who believe....if there IS a second coming of Christ.... (9/30/2006 5:18:42 PM)

tpam is a spoil sport and would love a second coming with moi !!
 
Oops wrong thread [:D]




Level -> RE: For those who believe....if there IS a second coming of Christ.... (9/30/2006 5:25:08 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: missturbation

tpam is a spoil sport and would love a second coming with moi !!
 
Oops wrong thread [:D]


LOL misst [:D]




missturbation -> RE: For those who believe....if there IS a second coming of Christ.... (9/30/2006 5:35:30 PM)

not exactly the reaction i expected but im honoured u find me funny  




Level -> RE: For those who believe....if there IS a second coming of Christ.... (9/30/2006 5:39:22 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: missturbation

not exactly the reaction i expected but im honoured u find me funny  


Funny and wonderful in many ways, I'm sure, my friend. I also keep in mind while answering that you have a master *arches eyebrow and smiles*




missturbation -> RE: For those who believe....if there IS a second coming of Christ.... (9/30/2006 5:42:00 PM)

I certainly do have and a wonderful Sir he is too. I'm one lucky girl [:D]




pinkee -> RE: For those who believe....if there IS a second coming of Christ.... (9/30/2006 6:23:15 PM)

i remember debating this with friends in college; we all thought Jesus would end up institutionalized in Bellevue along with all the reincarnations of Louis XV etc.
 
pinkee




Marc2b -> RE: For those who believe....if there IS a second coming of Christ.... (9/30/2006 8:12:11 PM)

Upon returning Jesus schedules a press conference (Wednesday, 9:00pm – preempting "Lost" and prompting many angry calls to the ABC switchboard). "What part of ‘thou shalt not kill,’ don’t you understand," he begins. He denounces the death penalty bringing cheers from the Left while the Right calls him soft on crime. Then he denounces abortion, which pleases the Right but the Left screams that he is against women’s reproductive freedom. "Assisted suicide is wrong," says Jesus. The Right hollers, "hallelujah " while the Left becomes even more dejected. "War must end," continues Jesus. The Left cheers again while the Right calls him un-patriotic.

Next Jesus starts talking about sexual issues. It isn’t long before the Left and the Right, for the first time in history, set aside all their differences to unite in a common enterprise – running Jesus out of town.




cabernet -> RE: For those who believe....if there IS a second coming of Christ.... (9/30/2006 8:36:51 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: sissifytoserve

What would jesus drive?

A Hummer?


A teenage boy who recently turned 16 was wanting a car to get around in.  He was trying anything to get his dad to get him a new car.  His dad was adamant about his son cutting off his long hair and then they could discuss him getting a used car.  He tried telling his dad, “Hey Dad, long hair is in style!”  But got nowhere.  In a revelation he tried and argument his dad could not turn down.  “But Dad, JESUS had long hair!”  And his dad said, “Yes son, that’s true…  And Jesus also walked everywhere he went.”




Dtesmoac -> RE: For those who believe....if there IS a second coming of Christ.... (9/30/2006 9:43:02 PM)

On track record he will turn up in some forsaken part of the world where a world dominating empire is keeping a deeply devided once powerful people under subjugation by an evil front man .....................

.........so my bet is he will turn up working for Amnesty International in a place called Essex in Britain  : ) 

............Tony Blair will wash his hands in public while his wife fights for Jesus's human rights and Bush demands that J is sent to the tower of  simply be placed on a plane to Gitmo for daring to suggest that those that live by the sword shall die by the sword or a fat Bush will not fit through the eye of a needle..........................LOL.





CreoleCook -> RE: For those who believe....if there IS a second coming of Christ.... (9/30/2006 10:35:49 PM)

For some reason, I think when decided to walk to New York, from Jeruselam...not one fucking immigration officer is gonna ask to see a green card from a man walking on water, across the Atlantic Ocean, but I'll be damned if He doesn't get mugged as soon as He steps foot in Manhattan... "Hey man, gimme your robe..."





FangsNfeet -> RE: For those who believe....if there IS a second coming of Christ.... (9/30/2006 11:22:35 PM)

I think Christ is waiting on his Visa. Perhaps that's what is taking him so long to get here. I've only been hearing that it's time for him to come now since the day I was born.

Why is it that we have so many who can't wait for the end of the world? So many push for Jyhad and Armagedon and are ready to start before God gives the signal.




UtopianRanger -> RE: For those who believe....if there IS a second coming of Christ.... (9/30/2006 11:27:20 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: sissifytoserve

What would jesus drive?

A Hummer?


Nah... I think he'd be much smarter and drive a Volvo or a Benz.



 - R




Page: <<   < prev  1 [2] 3   next >   >>

Valid CSS!




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy
0.03125