quote:

ORIGINAL: Dnomyar

I see a lot of subs saying that they are fiesty and a handful. Then they say that they are not into floggings or spankings. The question is How do you disipline them.

Hmm, well I am a fiesty,  handful, rude, insulting, sometimes humorous masochist.  But then, I don't lay claim to submission either

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHugs

Dear Dnomyar, Ladies and Gentlemen;
 
I see those who claim to be a hand full and fiesty, putting up a sign to my mind's eye; of someone who throws down the gauntlet/glove as a challenge.  I view such individuals as manipulators period.  Manipulators are all about controling another--usually the Dominant.
 
It is a difference, in being spirited and energetic.  The intent is totally different.
 
For those who identify themselves as SAMS or fiesty/hand full; I don't let them continue on in my personal circle.  If I deal with them I don't give them the attention and ignore them.  Personally, I don't find their behavior attractive.  If there is a brief 'exhibiting' of SAM like behavior or manipulation; they will taste a wide variety of selected punishments from passive; which is non-touch, squat unsupported facing a corner, on rice and or fish tank gravel with bare feet.  Any display of rebellion will start the time in the corner all over again.  They will know the consequences long before such punishments are given and what I won't tolerate.  The next to the most severe punishment is listening to a endless tape of Barney's Friend's song or TelleTubbies baby giggles and cooing, from a set of ear phones and the walkman.  Most severe is total dismissal, removal of the collar and their belongings on the curb.
 
I do like having fun and humor about but, I won't have SAMS or manipulating slaves/submissives.
 
Respectfully submitted for consideration,
Lady Hugs

quote:

ORIGINAL: SirLordTrainer

Or maybe Im a tad more experienced and you need to study more and catch up?  This isnt kindergarten college, its B D S M.. Its Not about P A I N

quote:

ORIGINAL: maudite

quote:

ORIGINAL: SirLordTrainer

Or maybe Im a tad more experienced and you need to study more and catch up?  This isnt kindergarten college, its B D S M.. Its Not about P A I N

While I'm sure you have lots and lots of experience, that doesn't necessarily mean you've seen everything there is to see. Isn't it just possible that the reason all the subs you've known were into pain was because that's what you want/expect of your subs, and thus you select for that type?

I don't know whether you've been active in your local scene, but that too can provide a skewed perspective; from what I've seen, the people who gravitate toward public scenes tend toward the SM end of the spectrum. In fact, because of the predominance of what you might call 'flogger culture', many people who aren't interested in pain may actively avoid their local scene because they feel intimidated or afraid they'll be branded a 'fake'.

Indeed, people like you who feel they know what 'all' subs (or doms, or tops, or bottoms, or whatever) like are exactly why people like me avoid participating in BDSM culture outside of our own homes. Do you make such assumptions in other areas of your life? Do you assume that 'all' women want children, and that those of us who say we don't just don't know it yet, and will eventually change our minds? I run into that attitude a lot, and it's no more valid than the belief that all subs like pain. (Me, I can deal with some pain on occasion, but I'm not overfond of it. And I don't want kids, either. I've had 39 years to think about it, and I've thought a great deal about both topics, so I've got a pretty good idea what I do and don't want. Anyone who thinks they know what I want better than I do will quickly be talking to the back of my head as I walk away to find someone more sensible to talk to.)

You've apparently forgotten that subs are people, and thus each one has her own unique wants, fears, and interests. Thinking you know what 'all' of any group of people wants is pure arrogance, and saying so only makes you look foolish.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Dnomyar

I see a lot of subs saying that they are fiesty and a handful. Then they say that they are not into floggings or spankings. The question is How do you disipline them.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Dnomyar

I see a lot of subs saying that they are fiesty and a handful. Then they say that they are not into floggings or spankings. The question is How do you disipline them.

The dominant says, the submissive does. But first, the two should sit down and see how compatible they are. If they match, and the submissive is a good one , there should be little or no need for discipline. You say, they do. If they don't do, or don't do well, you talk to them, get to the problem, and then they should correct their behaviour.

quote:

ORIGINAL: SirLordTrainer

No sweetness, Im referring to ''lifestyle BDSM'' or those who choose to become a part of therein.. Vast difference.. As such I hope Im categorizing the brave souls who wish to explore themselves deeper .. Otherwise dont you think you may be shortchanging yourself out of something you may truly enjoy in the long run..

quote:

ORIGINAL: Dnomyar

I see a lot of subs saying that they are fiesty and a handful. Then they say that they are not into floggings or spankings. The question is How do you disipline them.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Dnomyar

I see a lot of subs saying that they are fiesty and a handful. Then they say that they are not into floggings or spankings. The question is How do you disipline them.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Dnomyar

I see a lot of subs saying that they are fiesty and a handful. Then they say that they are not into floggings or spankings. The question is How do you disipline them.