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RE: Good Dom, embarrassing Dom - 9/26/2006 12:00:46 PM

HebiDom

Posts: 18
Joined: 8/21/2006
Status: offline

All I’m after is a reaction, an acceptance that there are people on here that aren’t genuine. If me breaking a rule exposes people belittling our way of life then so be it.

(in reply to spanklette)

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Post #: 21

RE: Good Dom, embarrassing Dom - 9/26/2006 12:02:49 PM

MsKatHouston

Posts: 1909
Joined: 6/7/2006
From: Houston, TX
Status: offline

Of course there are. There are everywhere. Most people are aware of this. Thus, the "protect yourself" you keep hearing (seeing?).

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~If you can't be a good example, you'll just have to serve as a horrible warning~

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Post #: 22

RE: Good Dom, embarrassing Dom - 9/26/2006 12:06:24 PM

Dnomyar

Posts: 7933
Joined: 6/27/2005
Status: offline

zumala if we did'nt listen to gossip we would not be on here.

(in reply to raiken)

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Post #: 23

RE: Good Dom, embarrassing Dom - 9/26/2006 12:24:33 PM

Frank01

Posts: 270
Joined: 9/7/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: HebiDom

All I’m after is a reaction, an acceptance that there are people on here that aren’t genuine. If me breaking a rule exposes people belittling our way of life then so be it.

The end justifies the means..I think Hitler said that too.

(in reply to HebiDom)

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Post #: 24

RE: Good Dom, embarrassing Dom - 9/26/2006 12:24:49 PM

FirmhandKY

Posts: 8948
Joined: 9/21/2004
Status: offline

Links you may be interested in:

World's Largest Database Ranking Men

Truth of Rumor

True Dater

No recommendations, and not bdsm related, necessarily. I've seen others as well, but didn't spend much time googling, 'cause I figure once you get the idea, you'll spend the effort if you are interested.

If you don't find one you like, maybe it's an unfilled need, and you can start your own cyber-bdsm rating thingee?

Oh, and a few funny links as well:

"Screwed up" Relationships

No Marriage.com

American Women Suck

FHky

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Post #: 25

RE: Good Dom, embarrassing Dom - 9/26/2006 12:29:03 PM

HebiDom

Posts: 18
Joined: 8/21/2006
Status: offline

thank you :)

(in reply to FirmhandKY)

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Post #: 26

RE: Good Dom, embarrassing Dom - 9/26/2006 12:54:01 PM

diamonddreamlove

Posts: 770
Joined: 5/19/2006
Status: offline

It is everyones responsibility to check out the others for themselves. What is my kink might not be your kink and i want to make my own decision about who i can and can not talk to. As for Doms having to leave for family reasons it does happen and as for disappearing, well i am sure some nice vanilla lady is out there wondering what happened to my nice vanilla husband but i can't tell her cause i don't know her. I do know he died and won't be back! Things happen life happens and no one can promise they will always be there. Now granted these Doms may be the scum of the earth but well perhaps their is a nice scummy sub that would fall for them and have their undying devotion. Just a thought about openness. Is a wonderful thing to have which means don't forget to allow them humanness as well. Just a sub but hopefully one that uses her brain.

diamond

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Post #: 27

RE: Good Dom, embarrassing Dom - 9/26/2006 1:14:48 PM

NastyDaddy

Posts: 957
Joined: 9/8/2004
Status: offline

I was told the besterer Dom wiffout a doubt is NastyDaddy... then I spanked her for talking with her mouth full.

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Post #: 28

RE: Good Dom, embarrassing Dom - 9/26/2006 1:25:01 PM

agirl

Posts: 4530
Joined: 6/14/2004
Status: offline

Sorry matey but for as many of your subbie friends that are left crying there are doms aplenty feeling rather less than uplifted too. Bandying names about in such a way isn't likely to be the least bit helpful.

agirl

(in reply to HebiDom)

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Post #: 29

RE: Good Dom, embarrassing Dom - 9/26/2006 1:28:58 PM

HebiDom

Posts: 18
Joined: 8/21/2006
Status: offline

I agree that subs are as bad as Doms, all the more reason to try n sort things.

I feel I’m in a loosing battle here but I’m not the only one who feels like this, just maybe the only one prepared to say anything

(in reply to agirl)

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Post #: 30

RE: Good Dom, embarrassing Dom - 9/26/2006 1:36:36 PM

raiken

Posts: 868
Joined: 10/18/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: HebiDom

I agree that subs are as bad as Doms, all the more reason to try n sort things.

I feel I’m in a loosing battle here but I’m not the only one who feels like this, just maybe the only one prepared to say anything

Actually it is more like preaching to the choir. As you get accustomed to this site and its fellow members, you will see for yourself, that complaning will only get you these type of threads and the wankers and wannabees get some attention from the complaining, which solidifies their feeble existence. *grin Try not to take this so seriously, or personally, it is what it is, and we all find our own ways to handle ourselves and not let things become so overblown, if it gets too much for you, then walk away from the computer for a while and come back when you are refreshed. All in all, you will learn lots just by being on the forums. Indeed, welcome to CM! *smile

(in reply to HebiDom)

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Post #: 31

RE: Good Dom, embarrassing Dom - 9/26/2006 1:42:34 PM

HebiDom

Posts: 18
Joined: 8/21/2006
Status: offline

Thank you for the most satisfying response so far. I hope some subs that have had problems read all this and help them to realise that there are genuine people out there, one of my friends sadly has been messed about so much she has left the lifestyle but hopefully others will not suffer the same fate.

(in reply to raiken)

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Post #: 32

RE: Good Dom, embarrassing Dom - 9/26/2006 1:53:46 PM

agirl

Posts: 4530
Joined: 6/14/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: HebiDom

I agree that subs are as bad as Doms, all the more reason to try n sort things.

I feel I’m in a loosing battle here but I’m not the only one who feels like this, just maybe the only one prepared to say anything

Nope, you're not the only one. But wherever you are , whatever you're into, there's the possibility of bumping into the odd * not so nice* person. People will be people..........good'n'bad.

People have to look after themselves, take any precautions they personally think they need to.

agirl

(in reply to HebiDom)

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Post #: 33

RE: Good Dom, embarrassing Dom - 9/26/2006 2:34:05 PM

ExSteelAgain

Posts: 1803
Joined: 7/2/2006
From: Georgia
Status: offline

This thing would snowball. Every released sub would put her exDom on the list. Doms would put subs who left them on there. Subs would put subs there, Dom, Doms. Pretty soon we would all be on it. This is pretty easy to see.

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Post #: 34

RE: Good Dom, embarrassing Dom - 9/26/2006 2:46:25 PM

Bearlee

Posts: 2311
Joined: 10/25/2004
From: South Central CO
Status: offline

Actually, I was invited to participate in a Domme's Website (I was topping, some) where one can add names of 'bad boys'; male subs who they've deemed either time-wasters or fakes or dangerous or just stupid. I refused to get involved...it's on Yahoo somewhere.

(in reply to ExSteelAgain)

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Post #: 35

RE: Good Dom, embarrassing Dom - 9/26/2006 3:02:26 PM

spankmepink11

Posts: 1310
Joined: 9/28/2005
Status: offline

Once again i will refer to a forum members tagline, "there are no victims, only volunteers" that may sound harsh but responsibility lies on myself, and my choices.(of course there are exceptions i'm speaking generally) As many have stated, there are insincere people in all orientations, and such a listing would assuredly be abused by some.

We've all been left crying a time or two i'm sure, we're adults...we examine the choices we make..and hopefully learn from our mistakes. Instead of pointing fingers and calling people out maybe you should suggest to your friend that she participate in forums such as these to educate herself on ways to avoid making the same mistakes in the future. ( as was mentioned by others also)

just a thought...

good luck

< Message edited by spankmepink11 -- 9/26/2006 3:03:19 PM >

(in reply to Bearlee)

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Post #: 36

RE: Good Dom, embarrassing Dom - 10/1/2006 6:32:24 PM

patina

Posts: 493
Joined: 9/14/2006
From: no
Status: offline

When I was on another site a reular dating one they had a system for leaving comments about other members. With each members profile was a post site where you left your user name, and anyone who wanted to ask a question could contact you. That way you got the whole story. It worked too for a guy who had played me I left my name there, another gal contacted me. I told her what he was like, she was able to make a choice as to whether to continue on or drop him. I gave the powers to be on this site this suggestion and the sites name they said they would take it into consideration.

I gave them an example of a player on this site who just keeps changing his user name he has had 4 that I know of already so it does no good to block him, but we do need to have a way of protecting each other from certain types. I was threatened by several member on here because I told one Dom off the same one who changed his name. His Friends even hunted me down on Yahoo. I don't scare easily, if at all.

Patina

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Post #: 37

RE: Good Dom, embarrassing Dom - 10/1/2006 7:37:17 PM

LadyHugs

Posts: 2299
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

Dear HebiDom, Ladies and Gentlemen;

Unfortunately, there are those who make sport of spoiling things for others. With the dynamic that M/s, D/s, BDSM and or S&M supports, it makes it an ideal pool for easy prey.

Another unfortunate thing, within the community, is that all of us are subjected to other's opinions and or personality differences. When it gets to the point of negative and or those who are so pea-green with envy, they'll trash the reputation without due cause or evidence. Hearsay rules, rather than evidence in most cases. So, those who don't suit another or differ in opinions can easily find themselves Black Listed or reputation ruined. It really seems to be easy to hide as a bad guy (gender neutral) and resurface. Some have moved and start the same nasty behaviors--some even criminal.

But, this happens in the adult vanilla world. We all are exposed to the possibilities be it in the scene or at school and or the work place.

That said, if 'submissives' feel that an individual has wronged them, in their "messages" section of Collarme.com, there is a way to report abuse. Unfortunately, it doesn't address harassment unless it has 'threats' associated. I do understand that they have to have a higher level of intolerance, as people cannot agree on what constitutes the elements of harassment, even in a court of law.

In addition, as one poster mentioned--what somebody's trash is; its somebody elses treasure.
This is why some complaints and black listing others backfire.

The policy of CM thus far, does not permit naming individuals and, might cause you more harm then the individual(s) you have targeted.

Heart is in the right place but, this particular site attempts to keep the many cases of sour grapes to the bare minimum.

Respectfully submitted for consideration,
Lady Hugs

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Post #: 38