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Profiles - 9/19/2006 9:28:14 AM   
Dnomyar


Posts: 7933
Joined: 6/27/2005
Status: offline 		What can a person write in their profile that would attract you to them? let's keep this to the point. Don't go on a rant about bad profiles.
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Profiles - 9/19/2006 9:31:33 AM   
siouxie


Posts: 1725
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Southwest UK
Status: offline 		a similar sense of humour to my own is what sticks out most in profiles and makes me want to chat to these people, but then i write from the perspective of one who is not seeking anything other than friendship. writing a profile like my own (long-winded and boring) is a great way to make sure you never get mail(!)

_____________________________

[/end sarcasm]

My therapist says that would not be appropriate just now

(in reply to Dnomyar)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Profiles - 9/19/2006 9:32:24 AM   
givemyall


Posts: 620
Joined: 12/3/2005
Status: offline 		Bank account details

Sorry, couldn't resist!

(in reply to Dnomyar)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Profiles - 9/19/2006 9:35:54 AM   
zumala


Posts: 1121
Joined: 6/16/2005
Status: offline 		That's easy. 
 
1) Obvious intelligence combined with actually caring to make a good impression.  In other words, they make sense and they know how to use a spell checker!
 
2) Confidence with a noticeable lack of that damn annoying 'swagger' that seems to say that they are lord of the fricking universe in their own eyes.
 
3) And personally, I'd need to see that someone is interested in BOTH pup and I as people.  I'm tired of being pursued as a female while they try to somehow cut pup out of the picture.  Ain't gonna happen.

(in reply to Dnomyar)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Profiles - 9/19/2006 9:37:06 AM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline 		Read my profile.  That's what.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to Dnomyar)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Profiles - 9/19/2006 9:43:56 AM   
MasterFireMaam


Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
Status: offline 		Think about answering these questions:

Who are you...i.e., what are you hobbies, taste in music, etc etc

What do you want? A relationship or multiple relationships, a play partner, a sex slut? All of the above?

What do you have to offer? Are you a leader, a financial guru, a bum?

And, remembe that some of this will change over time mostly by trial and error. I thought I wanted a very military-like household...but I've learned that, while it makes me totally hot, I just don't have the energy to do that all the time. Good for role play and high protocol, though. :-)

Master Fire


_____________________________

The power of who we are can be intoxicating. The power of who we could be is humbling.
-----
Ms Relationship Books
-----
BDSM How-To Books

(in reply to Dnomyar)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Profiles - 9/19/2006 10:04:21 AM   
toservez


Posts: 1733
Joined: 9/7/2006
From: All over now in Minnesota
Status: offline 		1) Be positive
2) Show passion
3) Be honest and more importantly be honest with yourself.
4)Put genuine effort and in some detail write about who you are, what you are wanting in the other and what type of situation are you looking for.

But in summary I am looking for effort and real information about the person and that the person has written it to try to find a true match and not just anybody who will talk to them.

(in reply to MasterFireMaam)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Profiles - 9/19/2006 10:08:37 AM   
Anarrus


Posts: 475
Joined: 11/8/2005
Status: offline 		Attracted to them for what.....a friend, a mutually self-serving and non-committal roll in the hay, a casual or not-so-casual play partner or a long term life partner?

Intelligence attracts me the most, followed by a somewhat attractive appearance, so have a pic (yes I am a bit shallow about such things).

Other than those two things, I look for a sense of compatibilty on both vanilla and lifestyle levels. It's great being on the same page with someone, instead of having to re-write the book.

I also look for little hints in their profile that give indication if we'd be a good fit or not. They may be a wonderful sub or a slave, but they not be one who would be a good fit for me and what I seek.

Be well

(in reply to Dnomyar)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Profiles - 9/19/2006 10:46:54 AM   
TNstepsout


Posts: 1558
Joined: 8/3/2005
Status: offline 		There are quite a few threads on this subject and many, many good suggestions. You might try searching the topic to see what comes up.

I also look for a sense of humor and something unique. I really like profiles in which a person expresses who and what they are all about instead of just generating a laundry list of characteristics. If you are funny and have a great sense of humor, I'd really prefer to see examples of it in your writing than reading "I have a great sense of humor". And by all means NEVER tell people you are very "intelegent".

I also prefer profiles that focus on the person not the role they are seeking. It's nice to mention your interests in your profile, but I'm put off by entire profiles that try too hard to project a dominant or submissive character.

A brief mention of your primary kinky interests is fine, but please no gory details or obsession on a particular fetish.

A nice G rated pic. Please look generally neat and tidy and happy.

(in reply to Anarrus)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Profiles - 9/19/2006 11:47:55 AM   
Pimpernell


Posts: 198
Joined: 12/10/2005
Status: offline 		Actually putting something in at all helps.  Then something that reflects you.  A basic standard profile is fine as long as you put in some journal entries that showcase some aspect of your personality, whether that be your dry wit or poetical soul or whatever.  Filling out the interests section gives someone a hook to start a conversation.

(in reply to TNstepsout)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Profiles - 9/19/2006 12:20:10 PM   
gentlethistle


Posts: 186
Joined: 10/28/2005
Status: offline 		For me, it is almost always less about what someone writes about in their profile than how they express themselves.  To the extent that I might find myself attracted to someone patently obviously incompatible with me if they wrote well. 

Laura

P.S.  A spellcheck of the text also works wonders. A bit like flossing teeth before going out for the night...

< Message edited by gentlethistle -- 9/19/2006 12:26:22 PM >

(in reply to Dnomyar)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Profiles - 9/19/2006 12:25:20 PM   
juliaoceania


Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline 		I look for someone that has an attitude that shows that what they wanted out of a relationship involved an "us" and not a "me" attitude. In my mind it is not all about the individual, but about what we both bring to it. Someone that speaks of time given to their community is appealing too.

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to Dnomyar)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Profiles - 9/19/2006 12:40:18 PM   
Nuke718


Posts: 240
Joined: 8/2/2005
Status: offline 		Three things I look for...
1.  Took time to tell me about their likes and interest both inside and outside of the lifestyle.  If not in words, then at least used the checklist thing LoL.
2. Witty- Said something funny, not a professional comic, just something to make me chuckle or grin.  Preferably not mean spiritd humor, sarcasm is fun but I don't go for humor at others expense.
3.  Smart, especially about BDsM.  Big words don't impress, but somebody who sees to the heart of things and doesn't rely on cliches and catchphrases to describe their interests and experience.

N

(in reply to juliaoceania)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Profiles - 9/19/2006 2:57:05 PM   
Kahri


Posts: 70
Joined: 8/30/2006
Status: offline 		Typically, what I want to see is more.  Write more.  Actual paragraphs are good.  You are a complex being, with many thoughts and opinions and hopes and dreams and fears and axieties.  Write about a few of them in a direct and honest way.

I also like to see something that indicates who they are outside of their bdsm interest.  No one is an entirely sexual being.  And even if they were, they can't possibly communicate all the intricacies of their sexuality and spirit by choosing a few "lives for" and "loves" from the list.  I want someone who can discuss what they want in a frank and open manner.

(in reply to Nuke718)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Profiles - 9/19/2006 6:32:12 PM   
DivaDuchess


Posts: 402
Joined: 8/17/2006
Status: offline 		Humor is good ... also you have nothing filled out on your profile beside the basic 'hello'.  Like those looking for a Dom ... you are also seeking, you won't find what cannot find you or doesn't at least know your shoe size *lol*.  While saying you don't wish to be like all the others (slight offense here *lol*) ... some, like MINE *s* ... are pretty good.  A nice, clean pic is a good thing too.  Human beings are visual people, we look first.

I think I'll jump off my soapbox now ...



_____________________________

Duchess

Courage is not the absence of Fear,
But rather the judgement that,
Something else is more important than Fear.

The Brave may not live forever,
But the Cautious do not live at all.

(in reply to Kahri)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Profiles - 9/20/2006 12:05:55 AM   
Nimkii


Posts: 67
Joined: 11/22/2004
Status: offline 		put in the truth. what I do.

(in reply to DivaDuchess)
Profile   Post #: 16
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