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RE: humiliation - 9/5/2006 9:06:22 PM   
cloudboy


Posts: 7306
Joined: 12/14/2005
Status: offline
The X-Factor is whether or not the Mistress will be using Diana's famous sized KONG dildo or not. Absent this vital piece of information, I feel powerless to advise you.

(in reply to rubyleu)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: humiliation - 9/5/2006 9:50:57 PM   
ExSteelAgain


Posts: 1803
Joined: 7/2/2006
From: Georgia
Status: offline 		When in doubt, play and fuck. Feel guilty on the drive home.

_____________________________

You can paint a cinder block bright pastel pink, but it's still a cinder block. (By Me.)

(in reply to rubyleu)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: humiliation - 9/5/2006 10:28:52 PM   
bred2obey


Posts: 3
Joined: 8/22/2006
Status: offline
quote:

wrote the profile myself but its been modified here and there over time. i agree to everything on that profile. i just was curious to know if another sub or slave, female specifically, cos sometimes i feel male subs are wired differently, would feel seeing their Master fuck another woman, a Domme, while she was bound, and humiliated. i know i have to talk to my Master about this, badly.. because its bothering me so much at this point.. i just dont get it how some could do it. how do they do it..


i am a female "slave" for lack of a better term. If it is a slave's opinion that you seek then here is mine; i would say this would absolutely turn me on. Not the fact that it is degrading to me (though that could be a turn on) but the fact that it is making my Master happy. If He is enjoying it and is turned on by it then i am loving it :o) i trust Him enough to do what is right for both of Us. My relationship is not a casual one and has 10 years behind it so it may not be a valid opinion for you.

miss

(in reply to rubyleu)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: humiliation - 9/5/2006 10:58:31 PM   
raiken


Posts: 868
Joined: 10/18/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ExSteelAgain

When in doubt, play and fuck. Feel guilty on the drive home.


i feel along these lines also. i'll tell ya why.  On the one hand, you do not seem to feel fearful of danger for your life.  So devastation may be a strong word here?  i sense that there is trust to some degree.  You stated you also want to be used by your Master, in that sense you don't seem to mind the casual.  You seem to mind the casual when it is done by another and not all you, all the time. You also stated something along the lines of not beng able to bear seeing your Master fuck another woman...could that devastation you speak of have a hint of jealousy?  You state you are not supposed to have limits.  Does that mean you want limits or that you want to rid yourself of having those limits?  A sure way to find out how far your limits may go, or not, either way, may be to simply try it...once, for yourself, and you get to serve your Master as well.  Could turn out to be a win win situation if you give yourself a chance to have other experiences and see how you process things internally.  You may surprise yourself as to how far you truly can go.  Or, you may find an answer in the other direction, as in you will KNOW for sure that this is a hard limit, after trying it once, but at least you will know with more clarity/certainty then you have now.  i don't usually reccomend trying that type of humiliation though unless you have a good sense of self, and of the relationship.  This is just to give you another angle to consider. 

< Message edited by raiken -- 9/5/2006 11:04:38 PM >

(in reply to ExSteelAgain)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: humiliation - 9/5/2006 11:50:55 PM   
Estring


Posts: 3314
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		Boy, there are so many things that seem wrong here... If the relationship is a casual one, why would that upset you so much? And how can you have a casual relationship with your Master? And what do you mean you are supposed to be a slave? Who says so?

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Boycott Whales!

(in reply to rubyleu)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: humiliation - 9/6/2006 6:08:52 AM   
Kahri


Posts: 70
Joined: 8/30/2006
Status: offline 		I can't help getting the feeling that there is something deeply wrong in your relationship.  Sure, you want your Master, Dom, whatever you call him, to use you and enjoy you in every way possible.  But fantasies aside, he should fundamentally respect you and your limits.  He should build you up as his slave/sub, not knock you down.  It sounds like he has undermined your self-respect rather than enhancing it. 

I know it sounds contradictory that being insulted and used could build a person's confidence and self-respect, but if the relationship is handled correctly it does. 

So my first thought is that this relationship needs to go back to square one and have some really serious, in-depth talks.

Leaving that aside, however, and turning to the "how can any woman like this" bit - everyone is different.  Living in the Bay Area, I have been exposed to all kinds of relationships that I know most people would say "no woman would like that" or whatever.  I know women who enjoy seeing their men with other women.  I know women who enjoy seeing their men with other men.  If they are also into bdsm, and particularly if they are bi, it would be a very small step to enjoying a scene like the one you describe.

But obviously you wouldn't enjoy it.  You would find it traumatic, so it shouldn't happen.


(in reply to Estring)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: humiliation - 9/6/2006 9:50:39 AM   
Slipstreme


Posts: 817
Joined: 1/1/2006
Status: offline
quote:

as a slave, im supposed to accept everything, and have no limits

Please look up the threads on "no limits" slavery. Everyone has limits. They only disappear over time after you get to know your Dominant/Master, and you might find that your limits become their limits (not really that you have none, just there are some things your Dominant will not do to you). If you go into just any scene with just any body with this attitude, you can get yourself seriously hurt (because yes, there are some sadists out there who will take this to the absolute definition of "no limits").

_____________________________

Living the Dichotomy

Painslut? How about "Endorphin Junkie"?

For information about "the furry thing" please check out my profile journal entry for: 1/17/2006

Alpha of a leather family of four. Master to the slave z.

(in reply to rubyleu)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: humiliation - 9/6/2006 3:38:02 PM   
narcissa


Posts: 2
Joined: 8/13/2006
Status: offline 		There is one thing that particularly worries me about what you have said. That is that you are worried about talking to him, it will turn him against you... it always does. 

Alarm bells are going off for me here.  You have obviously already tried this conversation or simular with your Dom and had a negative and undermining reaction to trying to communicate your fears. 

If im perfectly honest it doesnt sound to me like you are going to come out of this unhurt, but you can learn some lessons from it.  Learn to value your submission, its a gift.  Even when you are used, especially when you are used, but you can and should hold out for what YOU need from a Dom.  And in this case its seems you need communication and support.  Are you and your Dom truly compatable?  i think thats the question i would be asking, and dont be afraid of seeing things as they are its ultimately less painful. 

There is also value in the arguements i've seen of being surprised by what you actually can do!  Like someone i know and respect says either do it or dont. Its a hard lesson to learn for me, but its a good one.

i really do hope that you can resolve this and be happy. 
best wishes


(in reply to GeekyGirl)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: humiliation - 9/6/2006 3:50:39 PM   
MissDeb


Posts: 9
Joined: 1/30/2006
Status: offline 		My dear,  as a Domme, I have used a similar scenerio and offer to your Master one slight modification:     -- before They begin their time together, I suggest that the slave's Domme strip you and your Master strip the male slave; then bind both slaves together facing each other, the male's penis at the vagina but not entering it.   Then the two are turned so that they can watch the Dominants engage in sexual play after warning the two slaves that they are to do their best to not become aroused, for each time you do, they must stop and apply a stroke or two to the exposed buttocks -- again the male's Domme to the female slave and vice versa. This modification offers a learning device as well as a pleasuring one.  It trains the slaves that arousal is to be controlled. Let Me know what He thinks ... Madame Deborah.

(in reply to GeekyGirl)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: humiliation - 10/24/2006 12:49:09 AM   
hunterrose


Posts: 2
Joined: 7/13/2004
Status: offline 		You should not reply to polite messages calling users a flake when it's not true - I have never failed to keep an appointment with anyone from this site. You are either a liar at worst or gullible and misinformed at best. While I'm owed an apology for your (Narcissa) rude response, I'll accept your not being so rude and dishonest to others in the future.  (it says "in reply to MissDeb" but it's not - I'm just excercising my right to not be lied about by the classless and dishonest).

< Message edited by hunterrose -- 10/24/2006 1:02:45 AM >

(in reply to MissDeb)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: humiliation - 10/24/2006 3:39:58 AM   
bandit25


Posts: 3029
Joined: 6/18/2005
Status: offline 		Since this thread is still livev, care to share?  What did you decide to do?  Believe me, I'm not unsympathetic to your plight.  I hope you took some time to think about your relationship and to carefully word the question to your Master.

(in reply to rubyleu)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: humiliation - 10/24/2006 6:27:37 AM   
Celeste43


Posts: 3066
Joined: 2/4/2006
From: NYS
Status: offline 		I can't imagine agreeing to a no limits, casual relationship in the first place.

As far as this particular scenario goes, you are sufficiently self aware to know that this will devastate you. And since this is casual, will he care? Can you trust him to put the pieces back together again afterwards? Judging by your comment that anything you say is twisted and used against you, I doubt it.

So think first about afterwards. Are you going to be able to trust in the future a person who will do this to you and not care how badly you get hurt? If not, then why not avoid the hurt by saving these very edgy activities for a committed relationship.

In addition, have you demanded a STD scan from all parties involved, and can you trust them not to have any sex with others for the six months between scans necessary to know if they're clean? Are you willing to bet your life on this? Remember, condoms do not prevent transmission of all diseases. And since this is a casual relationship, what happens if he gets Hepatitis and transmits it to you, will his insurance cover your treatment for life?

Personally I think you need to get some boundaries in to protect you, since you aren't in a committed relationship with someone whom you can trust to watch out for you. He appears, from what you say, to only want to use you to act out his fantasies but doesn't care if he breaks his toy.

(in reply to GeekyGirl)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: humiliation - 10/24/2006 6:39:16 AM   
angelic


Posts: 1807
Joined: 1/24/2005
Status: offline 		rubyleu, i most certainly empathize with your situation.  Is it possible the issue may be that your Master has never instilled a sense of security and trust within you?

~edited because it was typed before i completely awoke~

< Message edited by angelic -- 10/24/2006 6:53:44 AM >

_____________________________

~....and once you have tasted flight, you will walk the earth with your eyes turned skyward, for there you have been and there you long to return.~ -- Leonardo de Vinci


(in reply to rubyleu)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: humiliation - 10/24/2006 7:51:26 AM   
CreativeDominant


Posts: 11032
Joined: 3/11/2006
Status: offline 		I also find myself curious about what you finally decided to do.

I did not reply the first time this thread went out...could not wrap my head around casual, non-24/7 relationship and slave in the same breath.  While I struggle with my own inner issues regarding the whole concept of slave, one thing I am fairly emphatic on is the idea that it would be extremely difficult to act as a slave giving all to Master and/or Mistress in a casual relationship.  MOO.

(in reply to rubyleu)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: humiliation - 10/24/2006 8:21:08 AM   
Arpig


Posts: 9930
Joined: 1/3/2006
From: Increasingly further from reality
Status: offline 		is it jealousy? is it normal? is it because i wait too long for my Master that when i am with Him, i want Him to myself? am i selfish?

Yes, yes, yes, and finally yes.


_____________________________

Big man! Pig Man!
Ha Ha...Charade you are!

Why do they leave out the letter b on "Garage Sale" signs?

CM's #1 All-Time Also-Ran


(in reply to rubyleu)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: humiliation - 10/24/2006 2:05:00 PM   
mkswing


Posts: 25
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		If you are not comfortable with being a slave, try being a sub. you dont have to do something that you are not comfortable with. that is what consentual is all about.

(in reply to rubyleu)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: humiliation - 10/24/2006 2:42:01 PM   
justinedoll


Posts: 50
Joined: 8/10/2006
From: uk, poland, germany
Status: offline 		In my opinion BDSM relationship to be nice must by satysfing for bouth.
Bouth sides give and take. Slaves gree for Doms who fit to them, and Doms, want
slaves who fit to them. If somone need or like this limits be broken should find such type of dom. If not, better is to be with more parter master. there is some types of dominance and submission , but the most basic is to fit

(in reply to mkswing)
Profile   Post #: 37
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