RE: How to expose fakes? thoughts

RE: How to expose fakes? thoughts (Full Version)

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GddssBella -> RE: How to expose fakes? thoughts (8/11/2006 5:36:18 AM)
G'morning all: Bloody hell. Another "fakes" thread. Ok, let's see... are they a fake because you got turned down? Or you didn't like what they said? Perhaps they expressed an uncomplimentary opinion about you? Their style of play or relationship dynamics are different than yours? This is so high school drama. Kick it to the curb, block, delete and move on. edited to add I find it suspect that this individual's inspiration came from reading someone else's blog. Do the boards a favor next time. Use the search function. Stay safe, play nice, & share your toys w/ others... [:D] Bella

FirmhandKY -> RE: How to expose fakes? thoughts (8/11/2006 5:50:18 AM)
Fast reply: You know, I've not yet reached a conclusion, or come to peace in my own mind about a lot of things (and probably never will until I'm wormfood, and perhaps not even then), but one of the "things" that still bothers me is the seemingly total dissing of anyone who even asks about how to protect others from a certain class or type of harmful persons. Intellectually, I've come to my own conclusions about who are "fakes", "wannabes", who is "dangerous" and how to protect myself from them (as far as I can, anyway). I also think that anyone of even average intelligence who has spent any time in this world can verbalize exactly who they think they should stay away from, and who others might have a problem with in interactions. Yet there seems to be a totally denial of this, especially by the seemingly "most intelligent" posters here. It almost seems if it's taboo for someone to even entertain the idea that some rules, or some ideas or some conventions that might make things easier or more safe for others is taboo to express. I realize that you open a can of worms when you try to classify people and that since many of "our" practices and beliefs bring "us" opprobrium from "the mainstream" we are especially sensitive to doing so - yet ... yet ... yet .... It seems to me that there is something of a sense of smug self-importance, and a conundrum here. We all make judgements. It's a fact of life. I don't care HOW non-judgemental you say you are, you make those judgements. Is there something inherently wrong and evil about sharing those judgements? It reminds me of the comments about "no limit" slaves that we often see discussed here. There ARE limits. Different limits for different people without a doubt. But why is even the discussion about limits verboten? Like I said, I don't know the answer, or even if I can frame the question in a way that makes sense or would get a large degree of argeement, but I do know that something about this entire "we can not make judgements" bothers me. FHky

LuckyAlbatross -> RE: How to expose fakes? thoughts (8/11/2006 6:20:20 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: FirmhandKY I don't care HOW non-judgemental you say you are, you make those judgements. Is there something inherently wrong and evil about sharing those judgements? It reminds me of the comments about "no limit" slaves that we often see discussed here. There ARE limits. Different limits for different people without a doubt. But why is even the discussion about limits verboten? When it's online, with no standards whatsoever of how to make those judgements, with no possible way of substantiating those claims, and with no actual practical application to begin with- then it becomes a case of just annoying gossip. Anyway, I'd say about 99% of the time someone who feels a need to share about a "mean bad dom" is usually just a jilted ex who got into something they could have easily avoided if they'd used their good sense. If someone does something legally wrong, online is not the place to take it, and gossip offline only eventually causes more drama. Trust me, we've ALL been called fakes and wannabes. I used to joke that you aren't a "tru bdsmer" until you've been called fake at least 5 times. To try and make it an accepted and encouraged practice really wouldn't further any positive goals at all.

Owned1 -> RE: How to expose fakes? thoughts (8/11/2006 12:45:31 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: GddssBella G'morning all: Bloody hell. Another "fakes" thread. Ok, let's see... are they a fake because you got turned down? Or you didn't like what they said? Perhaps they expressed an uncomplimentary opinion about you? Their style of play or relationship dynamics are different than yours? This is so high school drama. Kick it to the curb, block, delete and move on. edited to add I find it suspect that this individual's inspiration came from reading someone else's blog. Do the boards a favor next time. Use the search function. Stay safe, play nice, & share your toys w/ others... [:D] Bella You are of course entitled to your own opinion, which I have a few of myself. If I had thought of this myself I would of admitted that, I did read a journal entry on someones profile that had a rant about someone they were talking with followed by the trials and tribulations in an attempt to meet. For anyone who has been online for anytime this has happened. I will admit to having it happen to me as well. On the other hand I have met some truly wonderful people from my online chats. Thanks for responding Owned

FirmhandKY -> RE: How to expose fakes? thoughts (8/11/2006 4:07:39 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross When it's online, with no standards whatsoever of how to make those judgements, with no possible way of substantiating those claims, and with no actual practical application to begin with- then it becomes a case of just annoying gossip. So, does this mean that in theory, you think it is a good idea, but it is only in practice that the problem develops? And since you can conceive of no way to make it happen in reality that doesn't cause more problems than it's worth - you dismiss the idea totally? quote: ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross Anyway, I'd say about 99% of the time someone who feels a need to share about a "mean bad dom" is usually just a jilted ex who got into something they could have easily avoided if they'd used their good sense. If someone does something legally wrong, online is not the place to take it, and gossip offline only eventually causes more drama. Perhaps this is true 99% of the time. Why do you think this to be the case? I mean, the case where the majority of "warnings" are actually complaints about a "jilted ex"? Could it be that the metrics are a function of the methods available? That a different concept and method might change the percentages? quote: ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross Trust me, we've ALL been called fakes and wannabes. I used to joke that you aren't a "tru bdsmer" until you've been called fake at least 5 times. To try and make it an accepted and encouraged practice really wouldn't further any positive goals at all. mmmm, I guess I've just been called a fake by you, since I've only been called a "fake" once. (hmmm, no, that wasn't "fake" that was "HNG", so I guess that means I am a not a fake, but if I were a fake, would I be a HNG? scratches head Of course since I've never been called a "fake" that means by your definition I am a fake ... darn, or is that "flake"? I'm soooo confused by the logic of it all [:D] ) But seriously .... To try and make it an accepted and encouraged practice - what specifically do you mean to make accepted and encouraged? If, indeed and in theory you believe that the sharing of information is valuable and a positive thing - aren't we then really discussing the best methods to share that information? FHky

GddssBella -> RE: How to expose fakes? thoughts (8/11/2006 7:45:19 PM)
G'evening all: chuckles You're very welcome Owned1. Mine is worth precisely as much as anyone else's; zero, zippo, zilch, nada... You get the idea. Pardon the jaded tone. The regulars here just see so much of these types of topics. quote: ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross When it's online, with no standards whatsoever of how to make those judgments, with no possible way of substantiating those claims, and with no actual practical application to begin with- then it becomes a case of just annoying gossip. She usually gets to the point faster than I do and more succinctly. Stay safe, play nice & share your toys w/ others... [:D] Bella

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