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We all have asked what if....? - 7/12/2006 4:08:25 PM

LotusSong

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From: Domme Emeritus
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We all wonder at one time or another.. "What if Ihad met my sub or Dom/me earlier in life?"

Slave and I met late in life at probably the only quirk in time it could have happend. One day we brought out our old pictures, yearbooks (that was difficult- neither one of us had a pretty puberty), baby pictures.

Thinking of how we were back-in-the-day :) I wouldn't have looked at him twice! And I was the same for him. He was career/establishment driven and I was a hippy :) Talk about oil and water. To come together at the one moment in time like we did still stuns me. Had our paths crossed 30 years earlier- we would have just kept going.

If you and your D/s partner had met earlier than you did..would it have happened at all?

Lotus

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RE: We all have asked what if....? - 7/12/2006 4:13:42 PM

Caretakr

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Joined: 6/24/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: LotusSong

We all wonder at one time or another.. "What if Ihad met my sub or Dom/me earlier in life?"

Slave and I met late in life at probably the only quirk in time it could have happend. One day we brought out our old pictures, yearbooks (that was difficult- neither one of us had a pretty puberty), baby pictures.

Thinking of how we were back-in-the-day :) I wouldn't have looked at him twice! And I was the same for him. He was career/establishment driven and I was a hippy :) Talk about oil and water. To come together at the one moment in time like we did still stuns me. Had our paths crossed 30 years earlier- we would have just kept going.

If you and your D/s partner had met earlier than you did..would it have happened at all?

Lotus

Fate is the way it is.

And 30 years ago, I wasn't who I am now.

And 30 years from now,who knows?

(in reply to LotusSong)

Post #: 2

RE: We all have asked what if....? - 7/12/2006 4:16:48 PM

cuddleheart50

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From: Kentucky
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I would have been alot happier alot longer.

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Sing like no one is listening.
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RE: We all have asked what if....? - 7/12/2006 4:25:14 PM

juliaoceania

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Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
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We are a little younger than you.. and I have never asked him this question so it is something I am going to have to ask him. I love this board for that reason, it gives me so many things to launch discussions with my Daddy so we can get to know each other better.

I will say that I know he was a punker and I was into harder rock like Van Halen. He was actually more politically astute than I was. I was interested in where the next party was going to be. He thinks he was a geek, well I was a geek too until I got out of high school, and then I kinda blossomed. I think I may have dismissed him, only because I was dumb when it came to men. As far as his side, I do not know if he woulda been into me or not, but I am thinking he might have been since he seems to have liked blondes with long hair all his life...smiles.

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(in reply to LotusSong)

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RE: We all have asked what if....? - 7/12/2006 4:35:19 PM

SusanofO

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Yes, I have done it many times. But I never did it for too long, or I got too sad.
It's something I think everyone does, at some time or another.

There is one person I dated that my sister warned me not to date I wonder about. He was in her law school class, she thought he was way too wild and did not respect women. I wanted to have fun!, and that was his middle name, it seemed, so I ignored her warnings - and we dated for four years anyway. She was amazed at how much calmer he seemed around me, she said. He was a blast to be with; so funny, smart and very good looking.

But - he moved to California, and we drifted apart. My sister predicted he'd be married about 6 or 7 times. I'll never know I guess, but I have wondered. He drank waaay too much, though, and I hope that did not turn into anything seriously debilitating for him.

I know this was about D/s partners, and he was not, nor do I currently have one (am not actively seeking ayt this moment, but plan to ) - but the thread topic made me think of him; he would have tried bdsm I am sure, if he'd known what it was.

- Susan

< Message edited by SusanofO -- 7/12/2006 5:27:52 PM >

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That perches in the soul,
And sings the tune without the words,
And never stops at all". - Emily Dickinson

(in reply to juliaoceania)

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RE: We all have asked what if....? - 7/12/2006 4:46:15 PM

Flame73

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While I know Fate can be a fickle Mistress, and so can I for that matter, I do think there is a method to the madness of destiny. If I had met Cross earlier in life I don't think I would have responded so well to his aggressive personality.
On the flip side, I don't think if I had met My boy any earlier in his life, he would have been ready for Me.
So I too, am of the belief that certain things happen when they do for a reason. I'm not the person I was a decade ago and I plan to be much kinkier a decade from now.

~S~

< Message edited by Flame73 -- 7/12/2006 4:47:36 PM >

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(in reply to juliaoceania)

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RE: We all have asked what if....? - 7/12/2006 4:46:39 PM

KnightofMists

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quote:

ORIGINAL: LotusSong

We all wonder at one time or another.. "What if Ihad met my sub or Dom/me earlier in life?"

um NO... this would be inaccurate ... Since this is not something I wonder about..

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Knight of Mists

An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

(in reply to LotusSong)

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RE: We all have asked what if....? - 7/12/2006 5:18:43 PM

LotusSong

Posts: 6334
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From: Domme Emeritus
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Really.. now that is unusual.

Ok.. for those who HAVE wondered.. feel free to respond.

You see, I "found" D/s late in life and wondered if I would have been drawn to it with the same person had it presented itself earlier.

Lotus

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Life Lesson #1

I'm not your type.
I'm not inflatable.

(in reply to KnightofMists)

Post #: 8

RE: We all have asked what if....? - 7/12/2006 6:23:50 PM

Arpig

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From: Increasingly further from reality
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ummmm.... given the age difference...I would say if we had met anything more than a year or two earlier and I would have been on dubious legal ground

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RE: We all have asked what if....? - 7/12/2006 8:33:33 PM

kisshou

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I think it would not have happened at all. Life is based on timing and if you change the timing you change everything.

(in reply to LotusSong)

Post #: 10

RE: We all have asked what if....? - 7/13/2006 3:05:12 AM

RavenMuse

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Joined: 1/23/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: LotusSong
If you and your D/s partner had met earlier than you did..would it have happened at all?

Erm if I had met helen during the last time I was activly looking, she would have been 14 and I'd have had nothing to do with her what so ever on a D/s level. Not just no, but HELL NO!

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And it must follow, as the night the day,
Thou canst not then be false to any man.

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(in reply to LotusSong)

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RE: We all have asked what if....? - 7/13/2006 3:45:18 AM

NINASHARP

Posts: 295
Joined: 4/23/2006
From: NJ/NYC
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I don't know about later in life, but I did have a growth spurt in the first steps of exploring my submission, which led me to who I am today. I guess because many things changed in my first years and a lot happened really fast, I find myself asking just where would I be now, today had I not taken the efforts to seek out my desires? Some of the things had a positive effect on my life while others not so positive. It's something to ponder, yes, but I don't feel I would go back and change much of it if I could.

Nina

(in reply to LotusSong)

Post #: 12

RE: We all have asked what if....? - 7/13/2006 4:39:29 AM

twicehappy

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Joined: 2/5/2006
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Master and Mistress and i have discussed this often and drew the conclusion that betwen the three of us we would have ended up with 20 or 30 blond and red headed bare foot kids and decided it was a good thing we did not meet until now.

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RE: We all have asked what if....? - 7/13/2006 5:13:11 AM

Lashra

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Its funny you bring this up, my sub was just asking this last nite. If we had met earlier I am not sure what would have happened we were as you said, like oil and water. I was very strait laced, never smoked never tried drugs or drank booze. He on the other hand smoked, drank and did far to many drugs. I would have never considered dating him at all as I would have viewed him as a loser.
I worked and paid my way through college and graduated, he took out student loans and then was so drugged all the time they kicked him out. Now he owes 30k in defaulted loans

He thought he was a Dominant male and was into Gor, I knew I was a Dominant female and not into Gor. He had subs and finally got a slave, only to find out it wasn't for him. I had a sub at the time who wanted to be a slave and I knew it wasn't for me.

We met and he had alot of soul searching to do because I was a totally different breed of woman then what he'd dealt with before. All said and done we have worked out nicely. I chalk his past up to lack of parenting/guidance, his hard headedness and the desire to be accepted by fulfilling a role model which everyone said he should be when in reality he was totally something else.

~Lashra

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“We can never judge the lives of others, because each person knows only their own pain and renunciation. It's one thing to feel that you are on the right path, but it's another to think that yours is the only path.”

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RE: We all have asked what if....? - 7/13/2006 6:40:38 AM

LotusSong

Posts: 6334
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From: Domme Emeritus
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Excellent post, Lashra.

I see what this thread is revealing, is that things occure when they should.. One cannot force life to be they way the wish until it's the right time for it to happen.

And we are not the ones determinig it :)

I think the next time someone asks me "How doI find a Dom/me or sub/slave" the correct answer will be "When you are ready"..

< Message edited by LotusSong -- 7/13/2006 7:04:07 AM >

_____________________________

Life Lesson #1

I'm not your type.
I'm not inflatable.

(in reply to Lashra)

Post #: 15

RE: We all have asked what if....? - 7/13/2006 7:26:54 AM

ownedgirlie

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quote:

ORIGINAL: cuddleheart50

I would have been alot happier alot longer.

I echo this.

(in reply to cuddleheart50)

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RE: We all have asked what if....? - 7/13/2006 7:43:36 AM

LaTigresse

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Joined: 1/15/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: LotusSong

Excellent post, Lashra.

I see what this thread is revealing, is that things occure when they should.. One cannot force life to be they way the wish until it's the right time for it to happen.

And we are not the ones determinig it :)

I think the next time someone asks me "How doI find a Dom/me or sub/slave" the correct answer will be "When you are ready"..

This is a bit how I view the whole thing. It's the primary reason I don't get all bent out of shape worrying about "finding" anyone. I think its more important to focus on the things at hand, the now, and do the best we can with today. If someone special comes into my life then I believe it will be as it should. If, and until then, I have to live the best life for me now.

_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to LotusSong)

Post #: 17

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