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mistoferin -> RE: Lifestyle friends (7/6/2006 5:30:29 AM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: WyrdRich
Assuming the people involved are heterosexual, some level of sexual thinking is going to occur eventually, even if it's just the phrase "nice ass" passing through your mind. Perhaps it is more of a testosterone thing in general. With drinking buddies etc, these are just passing thoughts that don't amount to anything but to go beyond that, into the deeper realms of a lifelong, one-on-one friendship, they have to be addressed somehow.
I understand. Thank you for clarifying. Most of the people I call "friends" are those of the long term, lifelong variety. I have a lot more acquaintances than friends...those would be the people that I see here and there at events of common interest...or who I connect with on the phone now and again. In the group of friends that I have of the opposite gender, yes there is some degree of lighthearted joking in regards to sex...but both parties are aware that is all it is. Now that you mention it, I'm not sure now how we ever came to that knowledge...we just did. Perhaps there may have been a conversation at some point...if there was I just simply don't remember it. Most of my very close male friends have been in my life for a long time...some as long as 28 years.
quote:
ownedgirlie
Now I am a slave, she is married and coming to learn things about herself through what I share.
I have one girlfriend who considers herself vanilla but she is as kinky as they come. We talk about lifestyle stuff and she understands me quite well. She too, tells me that she learns alot about herself talking to me. I tell her all the time that she'd make a great Domme...lol. I have another vanilla girlfriend who is one of the most submissive women that I know to her partner. She has a very hard time though reconciling that part of herself. She's hung up on the message that society sends out about women of today.
quote:
KinghtofMists
No... my lifestyle is not a fundamental requirement for the depth/connection I may have with my closest friends.... Character of the person has been and always will be the most important aspect.
I think that this is what all friendships have to be based on....friendships that can be sustained in the long term anyway. I have never chosen a friend based on their interests. They have to be people that I connect with and respect on many levels. You are correct in that character being the most important aspect. Thank you.
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