Quit yer bitchin.

Quit yer bitchin. (Full Version)

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jlf1961 -> Quit yer bitchin. (12/24/2013 10:45:18 AM)
Once more the United States Government has foiled my plans to set up a comprehensive radar controlled anti aircraft battery for the purpose of shooting Santa out of the sky and filling my freezer with reindeer meat. I find the fact that the US Government waves the regulations to allow that red suited [insert derogatory term here] to enter the airspace of the US without a proper quarantine period for the reindeer. Add to that the fact that there is no record of FAA inspections of the sleigh. The US public screams about the NSA spying on US citizens, "he knows when your sleeping, he knows when you are awake, he knows when you have been bad or good.." this guy has been spying on everyone for god knows how long. If it is okay for him to spy on us, then stop bitchin about the NSA, FBI, ATF or any other federal agency spying on you. Besides, how do you know that those government agencies arent working for the fat man? Or is it that the fat guy spies on you and then gives you "presents" if you behave within certain arbitrary rules that decide if you have been "good." What defines "Good" anyway? Was Phil Robertson being good? Or Lindsey Lohan? What about the A list celebrities that cant seem to keep their clothes on in movies? For that matter, how do you know you have been "good" this year? What about the 'bad' things we consider to be 'good?'

MalcolmNathaniel -> RE: Quit yer bitchin. (12/24/2013 11:01:55 AM)
You can get reindeer sausage online. I won't post a link but GIYF.

ShaharThorne -> RE: Quit yer bitchin. (12/25/2013 4:11:34 AM)
Remind me to check the butcher shop... Meanwhile, had a feral boar attack one of my brother's dogs. This is my nephew's dog and he is in Florida now with his mom. I have now idea what my brother is going to do. Mom is suggesting asking one of our neighbors for his hog trap.

Zonie63 -> RE: Quit yer bitchin. (12/25/2013 7:08:15 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: jlf1961 Once more the United States Government has foiled my plans to set up a comprehensive radar controlled anti aircraft battery for the purpose of shooting Santa out of the sky and filling my freezer with reindeer meat. I find the fact that the US Government waves the regulations to allow that red suited [insert derogatory term here] to enter the airspace of the US without a proper quarantine period for the reindeer. Add to that the fact that there is no record of FAA inspections of the sleigh. Of course, it could be that Santa is giving the U.S. government no other choice. Anyone who could seemingly warp time and deliver packages to millions of households in a single night would be a very potent enemy if we got on his wrong side. He must have a huge manufacturing base to be able to produce all those toys, but he could switch over to war production in a heartbeat if need be. He could outfit thousands of Santa sleighs with guns and rockets, along with the specially-designed "Rudolph" Laser System. They couldn't stop Santa even if they wanted to.

kiwisub12 -> RE: Quit yer bitchin. (12/25/2013 9:39:19 AM)
Bah hum bug .... stomps off in the snow dad gum gobment!

RemoteUser -> RE: Quit yer bitchin. (12/25/2013 9:41:17 AM)
Santa's voyeuristic kink isn't all that bad. Sure, he micromanages and he uses minorities for slave labour. He never talks about his wife but always wants somebody on his lap. Haven't we all been there? I think the US government just needs more red velvet and fluffy pompoms. (I think they've already indulged everything else I listed, for the man with many names who reverse burgles homes in a ride that makes steampunk look old school.)

MercTech -> RE: Quit yer bitchin. (12/28/2013 7:59:23 AM)
No, no, no,... they don't want to shoot down Santa but they do track him... Straight poop from snopes: http://www.snopes.com/holidays/christmas/santa/norad.asp

Rule -> RE: Quit yer bitchin. (12/28/2013 8:13:01 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: jlf1961 For that matter, how do you know you have been "good" this year? If one has been good, one receives candy. If one has been naughty, it is either being shipped off in a sack, or getting a coal in one's stockings.

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