just too "out there" (Full Version)

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jackpinesavage -> just too "out there" (6/28/2006 5:38:58 PM)

A simple question here:  Does anyone out there wonder if they are just too dang perverted to find anyone that will still be decent to them?



Piece -> RE: just too "out there" (6/28/2006 5:42:04 PM)

I've been there and done that....Don't worry. Somewhere out there is a person who is just as perverted and nasty as you are, I promise. It took me a while to find someone who could both care for my well-being and also do all the horrible things I was interested in. Just be patient.



cuddleheart50 -> RE: just too "out there" (6/28/2006 5:42:16 PM)

I have faith that there is someone out there for me, not matter how perverted I am or he is....



jackpinesavage -> RE: just too "out there" (6/28/2006 5:45:04 PM)

Thank you so much.  It is scary to feel like you are all alone.  I am tired of being embarrassed about what turns me on.



Piece -> RE: just too "out there" (6/28/2006 5:46:08 PM)

I really, really sympathize. I've been going through the same exact thing. Don't worry...no matter how much of a freak you are, there is someone out there who is freakier!



jackpinesavage -> RE: just too "out there" (6/28/2006 5:47:58 PM)

Thanks to all, I am sitting here embarrassed about something I asked of someone, and I appreciate the backing.



Caretakr -> RE: just too "out there" (6/28/2006 5:55:17 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: jackpinesavage

A simple question here:  Does anyone out there wonder if they are just too dang perverted to find anyone that will still be decent to them?


Not at all jackie-and if they do,they should write me.

And I'll show them how normal they are, by comparison![:D]



txpet -> RE: just too "out there" (6/28/2006 6:00:55 PM)

Of course ... and that is why so many subs/slaves/bottoms feel like they *deserve* abuse ... because of all the vanilla people that are repulsed, revolted, etc.
Master doesn't share all my kinks and fetishes butt he ones that He doesn't share, He finds ways for me to have indulged by Others.
Master never makes me feel bad about what i like or want.
you'll find One who does the same for you!



OedipusRexIt -> RE: just too "out there" (6/28/2006 6:01:13 PM)

To the OP:

Don't give up.
Don't be embarassed.
Don't stop being selective.

Follow those three rules and it all will work out.  It takes time, patience and luck.  Read the forums and realize that this "community" is a big, diverse place all by itself, and you fit in somewhere.

Most of all, remember that you'll only get the respect and treatment that you feel you deserve, so keep a good opinion of yourself and just relax.

It'll happen and it'll knock your socks off.



MzMyWay -> RE: just too "out there" (6/28/2006 6:17:55 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: jackpinesavage

A simple question here:  Does anyone out there wonder if they are just too dang perverted to find anyone that will still be decent to them?


On the surface, one might jump to the conclusion that you are without a partner. However, your profile indicates that you are already owned by a male dom.

Are you suggesting that he's not decent to you?



CrappyDom -> RE: just too "out there" (6/28/2006 6:23:37 PM)

I have known people who had rubber boots they used as "foot condoms" and liked to have their loves fuck them in the ass with a foot.  Others who used blood as anal lube.

What I have found prevented people from finding partners has never been kink, it has always been the inability to form healthy functioning relationships and or lack of basic social skills.



jackpinesavage -> RE: just too "out there" (6/28/2006 6:29:20 PM)

I was in no way insinuating that my Master is anything but wonderful to me.   I just think I may have overstepped his boundries regarding what is considered erotic verses perverted.  I feel embarrassed for what I asked and think my Master now thinks less of me and I am now afraid I may be too freaky for anyone that could actually care about me.



Shadowrun -> RE: just too "out there" (6/28/2006 6:49:19 PM)

This is a pretty good place to jump into the forums. The longer I am in the BDSM community the freakier I  seem to get. Actually I think that is not true, I think everyone has what they enjoy and feel too inhibited to express what they enjoy, and the longer they are in the scene the more they are willing to come out and express who they are, and also find some new kinks they have not been aware of.

I just came back from Maryland actually where I attended Leather Retreat http://www.leatherretreat.com and I can pretty much tell you there are quite a good bunch of perverts out there who are freakier than you. I have been stuck looking for relationships in the scene as well, and I can tell you it has been more up chemistry and personality than all their specific kinks. I still think the basic advice is everyone just needs to let their relationships find their own level and grow into them.

I also wonder what is this big dark secret that you are so worried about, because I am pretty sure I have seen stranger.



LokisBrat -> RE: just too "out there" (6/28/2006 7:02:04 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: CrappyDom

I have known people who had rubber boots they used as "foot condoms" and liked to have their loves fuck them in the ass with a foot.  Others who used blood as anal lube.



I wanna watch ......does that make me a pervert?


LOKI



Tamerofwild1s -> RE: just too "out there" (6/28/2006 7:17:30 PM)

Thought I would interject here .... when I started this lifestyle all those Eons ago I was merely into aloty of spanking . it was my fetish ... one thing I alwayssay is this lifetyle to and a few I have respect for is a journey . there will come times where the journeys will cross paths and grow as we go on . I tend to call it MY evolution . I have met alot of great people along they way andthey have shared with me things they like which became my likes as they sparked interest within me .... there is never too freaky as it is all perfectly good in a lifestyle whose main dynamic is always different ....... just keep doing what yourdoing OP and you'll be fine as long as your comfortable with it . and some where along your path someone will come along who finds you simply fascinating ....



Daddysredhead -> RE: just too "out there" (6/28/2006 8:11:07 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: jackpinesavage

I was in no way insinuating that my Master is anything but wonderful to me.   I just think I may have overstepped his boundries regarding what is considered erotic verses perverted.  I feel embarrassed for what I asked and think my Master now thinks less of me and I am now afraid I may be too freaky for anyone that could actually care about me.


Feeling embarrassed, and therefore vulnerable, can be a springboard to growth as long as the lines of communication are left open.  I have felt very shy talking to Daddy about certain things, and couldn't bring myself to look at Him after I asked Him about these things.  (Some weren't even of the kink variety, just things that were on my mind.)  But, He always managed to let me know that I was safe in stepping out into the scary places, trusting that He would not make fun or criticize me,  making me feel that I could trust Him to do it again.



ownedgirlie -> RE: just too "out there" (6/28/2006 8:55:58 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Daddysredhead
He always managed to let me know that I was safe in stepping out into the scary places, trusting that He would not make fun or criticize me,  making me feel that I could trust Him to do it again.

That really is the key, isn't it.  I have brought up some things before that I thought were way too far out there.  He never batted an eye. Instead, he explored those thoughts in my mind and considered them.  Some things he has done, others he has not, but not once was I made to feel ashamed at what I brought up.  Of course, that did not mean I wasn't embarrassed or nervous to spit the words out in the first place.  But after a few times of doing that, I learned I could tell him anything. 

To the OP, did you feel his reaction was negative?  If not, it may just be a self-induced worry.



SusanofO -> RE: just too "out there" (6/29/2006 1:15:41 AM)

No, almost nothing shocks me anymore. Someone could tell me they are a cannibal and I'd probably say "Cool. Go for it". So, I say go for it - it certainly won't bother me (ever). I do still cringe at murder and doing unmentionables and there are some things I am personally scared to try right now (maye ever) but I couldn't care less if other people do them (except the murder and the unmentionables).

But  - I personally worry about being a "ho" at this point in time (and I am not a "ho" - I am truly not a "ho"). I am not hi-jacking this thread - it's late at night and I am talking to myself (I am not looking for an answer, just getting this out of my system I guess, so feel free to ignore it).

I've read about "sub frenzy" and don't want to victimize anyone with it - I want no part of whatever "fallout" results from it. On here, or in my home town. I know there are people that might think: "What's the problem? If you want to do something, just do it and don't tell anyone". Well, maybe...I am a little embarrassed to be talking about it - I guess it could be construed as a little TMI (too much possibly unnecessary information) but - I really want to get it out - it's a serious question I am dealing with.

I am wondering what some men do about this kind of thing. This is not a gamey plea for a _uck buddy. Maybe I have "issues" about anonymous or near anonymous sex (or maybe I might not, and that's what scares me).
I have people I could do that (have sex) with - it's that I am too scared I will mess with their minds right now to seriously consider being with them. 

The people I'd actually want to do it with are people I can't even think about doing it with because I either like them or think I could really like them in the future and I am way too weird right now to want to risk possibly hurting them. I wonder if anyone else has had this problem?

I wonder what some men do - maybe I can just do that (no offense to some guys and I do mean that). Some guys might be scratching their heads and saying: "What? What is the issue here?..." but, you know that saying: Don't _uck your friends (or was it don't _uck with your friend's heads?) - that is what I do not want to do (or potential friends' hearts or minds). 

I know what I am going to do - I am going to go pick up an anonymous person (well maybe not totally anonymous), take them home, tie them to my bed, and not let them out of my house for a week. At the end of that week they will either be so happy maybe they will practically pay me or else have me arrested (and at that point I will be so happy it will have been worth it). I know some will suggest masturbation but I've been doing that for years - I want another person. I just don't want any kind of emotional tie right now. But I am really ashamed of it - I really am ashamed I would want that. Just not ashamed enough to not want to do it. That's not like the kind of person I'd normally aspire to be, but it's truly where I am at right now. 

Hearing that might not go over too well with some folks -but now it's out there so it's too late to take it back. I guess I know just what I am going to do - find someone (not here on CM there are too many people I really respect here - or could, and I really mean that) - someone I don't know and will maybe never see again who doesn't care about "ties" and just do them until their brains fall out. I should probably be embarrassed but I am just not (geez, maybe I am a "ho". Well I've never been a "ho" before (really) so if I am one for a week that's not a crime. I am a grown woman.

Please (please please) nobody write me and "volunteer" (really, that is Not, despite what it could be construed as - what this is about) I think I know who I can go with and this isn't meant to sound arrogant (who wants an insane chick anyway);  but it really was a serious question. I probably didn't even need to write it - it sounds pretty stupid and self-centered and like: Why did she even have to say that? Now I feel like a nitwit(won't be the first time). Boy maybe I am really a Catholic girl scout. I need to get over it.

- Susan



meatcleaver -> RE: just too "out there" (6/29/2006 1:28:45 AM)

Desperation gives the impression of being desperate and is very off putting. Just enjoy the ride. There is more to life than kink and someone will come along sooner of later.



PlayfulOne -> RE: just too "out there" (6/29/2006 5:11:08 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: jackpinesavage

A simple question here:  Does anyone out there wonder if they are just too dang perverted to find anyone that will still be decent to them?


Jack,

I promise yoiu what ever perverse thoughts you have running around your mind, are running aorund the mind of someone else.  I do understand how you can feel.  I've been told a number of times that I am just too much, too intense,  too twisted,  take yoiur pic but yoiu get the idea.  There were thoughts and feelings that frankly scared myself and that I certainly kept hidden from others.  Now I have a wonderful little gilr who is every bit as perverse and twisted as I am.  This is the first time in my life I have ever felt so completely free to be me and have someone desire and love all of me (yes even those sick demented parts).  The best part is anything is open fo discussion.  No matter what one of us says there is never any fear that the other one will get that look of horror on their  face.

Remember sometimes our embassasment about topics is self induced.

Peace be with you

K



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