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RE: What does Edge Play mean to you? - 7/21/2012 11:09:03 AM

kalikshama

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quote:

ORIGINAL: sheisreeds

quote:

ORIGINAL: kalikshama

Edgy for me are things with sharp...edges

But seriously: needles and blades - things that draw blood.

Still in the sense that they push your the edge of your limits?

Oh yes. I've only done needles once and knives once or twice - the second time may have been a mind fuck.

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RE: What does Edge Play mean to you? - 7/21/2012 11:12:21 AM

kitkat105

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I think traditionally it means things that are literally dangerous, risking harm, but like NuevaVida said, I think it can also be applied to activities that come very close to people's limits.

The thrill/novelty of participating in things that scare me to either of those points hasn't worn off yet. That's usually when I say something like, "Let's give Jay Wiseman chills up his spine.."

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RE: What does Edge Play mean to you? - 7/21/2012 11:13:56 AM

littlewonder

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This is Kana writing on the Lilone's computer

quote:

ORIGINAL: sheisreeds

quote:

ORIGINAL: Kana

I like to push edges hard, so yes-I wanna push things almost as far as they can go...right up to the edge so to speak

What do you get out of pushing your own boundaries?

What do you get out of pushing hers?

And why do you like it?

1-I'm super ADD and an adrenalin junkie, so after doing something for a while I want to progress forward, push towards the next, higher level. I'm like this in pretty much everything, I'm just kinda wired to push harder, faster, more. When I ski, I wanna go to the deep deep mountains, the way off-trail stuff. When I skateboarded, I hit half pipes, full pipes and did pool riding, when I took martial arts I did full contact fighting, when I go to concerts I'm in the mosh pit.

I like staring fear in the eye, feeling it course through my body, then spitting in it's face in defiance and going "Geronimo." I like the rush I like the sensation, I like going where others won't, I like sacking up and hitting that shit.

And of course, that's also how one grows...by pushing boundaries, by pushing self, by transcending fear and limits and walking through them.

2-Grins, Once again, there's multiple reasons. I like, as in lovelovelove putting her on internal fences, catching her between her fear and her desire to please, her head and her heart, the pleasure and the pain, just catch her smack dab in the contradiction of her servitude.I like to watch her twist and squirm, watch her struggle to shed self as she nears and then meets the surrender, to hear her grovel and beg, whine and moan (Believe it or not, she didn't know how to beg before she met me. Now she's an Olympic level beggar). I love the power, I love the control, I love the dominion.
And she needs it. She needs for me to take her farther into the heart of surrender than she would willingly go. She needs me to smash down those walls and set her free, to blow through all her fears and ego and self and just shred it all away until she can float.

Plus, I just l love to hear her scream. It gives me mad wood. Need I any other reason?

3-I like it...well... basically because I'm a sick fuck like that :-)

How's that for honesty?

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RE: What does Edge Play mean to you? - 7/21/2012 11:54:48 AM

sheisreeds

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quote:

ORIGINAL: NuevaVida

Yeah, it's been my personal experience that the internal edgy stuff is far deeper reaching and more difficult than the external for me. However, it took an external physical (but not physically painful) influence to cause my internal self to nearly crack - go figure. Then again, I think one of the results of "extreme" external play is what it creates internally.

Maybe that's why I still have such strong negative reactions to the internal stuff these days. Ha, no maybe about it.

To me this is because internal edges hit on my ego integrity, it is not a risk to my body, but it is a risk to my sense of self.

Playing with shame and fear is pretty intense and can severely threaten who we are as people.

I can easily name 10 people I trust with my body, and only 1 I trust with my mind.

It's interesting too, because I can get all into edges as they relate to pain, and overt physical acts. I could talk about that stuff until I turn blue. The internal stuff (which I agree often came with physical imposition) I still lack (and don't want) words for, even when the experience was positive and helped me grow. Because it shone bright lights on those parts of me I don't like and don't want to show anyone.

quote:

hen again, I think one of the results of "extreme" external play is what it creates internally.

Absolutely, and the mental and emotional interaction during the physical act can completely change the outcome.

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RE: What does Edge Play mean to you? - 7/21/2012 12:01:00 PM

Musicmystery

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quote:

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What does Edge Play mean to you?

Doing it in Devil's Swimming Pool at the lip of Victoria Falls.

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RE: What does Edge Play mean to you? - 7/21/2012 12:07:12 PM

kalikshama

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Now that's an edge!

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RE: What does Edge Play mean to you? - 7/21/2012 12:24:45 PM

JeffBC

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quote:

ORIGINAL: kalikshama
Now that's an edge!

LOLOL.. no joke. That is like the picture in the dictionary for "edge play"

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RE: What does Edge Play mean to you? - 7/21/2012 12:40:22 PM

sheisreeds

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Kana
I like staring fear in the eye, feeling it course through my body, then spitting in it's face in defiance and going "Geronimo." I like the rush I like the sensation, I like going where others won't, I like sacking up and hitting that shit.

That's it right there.

For me though the adrenalin is a little watered down with an equal part of chaos. I love spending my life with someone who likes to fuck shit up as much as I do. I love rolling the dice and figuring out how to make it a win when luck isn't going my way.

I'm fairly certain this is a core part of my personality, something that is hardwired into my DNA. As soon as I could walk I'd run right into the ocean, just didn't give a shit, drove my parents crazy. I also would stick keys in light sockets to make all the lights go out. If it was there when I was two it was always there.

I like trouble.

I live for that "Oh Shit!" moment.

I think kink has kept me out of jail, and out of the hospital.

quote:

And of course, that's also how one grows...by pushing boundaries, by pushing self, by transcending fear and limits and walking through them.

We've been talking about how our play has progressed, and how we have learn so much about one another, grown together through these moments. We've been fairly quiet recently, because we've just been so satisfied. I look at the crazy fucked up bedrock of our relationship, and what we have put one another through in and out of scene, has made our foundation nearly indestructible. It's nice to just sit and enjoy the spoils of our wars.

I find busting through the edges, make all the rest of it more enjoyable, it's great to become carefree in a space you would previously never go. We have also gotten so much more skilled through all our crazy. It doesn't have to be all out to be amazing.

I had this dream when he and I first got together that we'd be able to seamlessly dance and fight. Our early attempts we're disappointing. I thought we'd never get it. Through all our fucked up scenes, flying through the air, landing in trashcans, getting in the head, spraining fingers, breaking glasses somewhere along the line we figured out how to meet the original vision.

quote:

I love the power, I love the control, I love the dominion.

I question for myself how at times I need the power and control. There are times that otherwise I'd feel completely powerless and helpless, put a knife in my hand and I am on top of it all. As a dominant and sadist I worry at times with obscuring my own vulnerability.

At the same time though when I push through the edge of my sadistic urges, my soul is stripped bare, I in awe of the paradox of desiring to cause harm to someone I love so much.

quote:

And she needs it. She needs for me to take her farther into the heart of surrender than she would willingly go. She needs me to smash down those walls and set her free, to blow through all her fears and ego and self and just shred it all away until she can float.

This is that relationship deepening bit. I'm certain it could be achieved by attending some sort of kumbaya spiritual retreat as well, but that just ain't my style.

quote:

Plus, I just l love to hear her scream. It gives me mad wood. Need I any other reason?

Yes, and no. Screaming can be achieved without edge play. It's clearly not just the screaming.

quote:

3-I like it...well... basically because I'm a sick fuck like that :-)

How's that for honesty?

Once again I question how much of this is hardwired.

I love skirting taboos, I love being inappropriate.

For a long time I thought it was just me saying fuck you to the universe over going through some bad shit in my life. Though I was always kinda like that, and I started realizing the sicker I got the better I was. I was becoming the authentic and genuine me.

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RE: What does Edge Play mean to you? - 7/21/2012 2:09:38 PM

samdarella

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ORIGINAL: ResidentSadist

Yes, my personal edge moves in conjunction with experience, skill, partners and equipment. Some partners are more fearless, some gear (like the water tank I want) makes edgy things easier. For example:

'Dunking' right now requires a bit of effort and set up. Hog tying in the tub or using the pool outside and risking the neighbors or police if she starts screaming too loud. I have a new girl and I haven't yet to play with dunking.

Now if I had that clear Lexan water tank I designed*, I would have already done some pretty intense water dunking with her.

*I want a clear plastic rectangular water tank. It should have two chambers with the divider at the 70/30 mark. The smaller chamber is the holding tank with pretty blue water and a heater. The other chamber is for the slave. This way she can see the water reservoir as it empties into her chamber. There is a whole cut in the lid so she can breathe through a tube while completely submerged.

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Oh shit. This is definitely edge play to me. Look Master, it's a squirrel. I'm baking cake. I have boobs. You can put shiny things through them.

Edge play to me is anything that requires lots of skill, concentration and focus to reduce the risk of harm. Lol. Or almost anything that was a hard limit a year and a half ago. Still requires a lot of trust. Yes that might sum it up. Things that make my rational brain say wtf are you doing. Then the zen part kicks in and I surrender myself.

What I consider edgy has changed over time. And yes I do want to keep moving towards the edge. I want to look over the precipice and feel the fear. To step off and soar. To feel Him controlling me the whole way.

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RE: What does Edge Play mean to you? - 7/21/2012 2:24:04 PM

littlewonder

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I used to be edgy when I was young. I would ride my bike down mountains with no brakes and just the wind through my hair, I would climb mountains, I did cuttings, I was a goth child, was part of the raves and underworld clubs, etc....I loved it.

But after I had a child I just couldn't bring myself to do that stuff again and it all scared me to death. I became extremely safe. Safety was/is still my comfort zone. I like safe.

BUT I also like the edge and now that my daughter is all grown and I'm once again....free. I'm learning to let loose and let go again. It's not a quick progression but it is fun along the way. I'm now remembering the fun I had when I was young and now I'm like "hey, you're free to do anything you want now. Why NOT jump off that bridge with just a bungee cord?? You used to love it before".

So while I have not progressed that far yet, I would really like to get back to that. I want to live again. I want to feel again. I don't want to be a mindless, mushy, drone just going through the daily routine anymore. I don't have to so why do it??

I love when Master and I share stories about our wild days. It brings an energy, a spark that I haven't felt in over 20 years, and I like the way that feels!! I like the rush. I like the adrenaline. I like the fun.

I just bought a mountain bike today and while it's just a starter and I'm afraid to death of it and rode it for the first time today in the city, completely nervous I was going to get killed, I made it home in one piece, in the pouring rain. I want to be able to get back in the saddle again and just have fun.

Master and I have talked about going skiing together in the future and I want to learn from him how to do that. I haven't skiied since I was really really young. It would be nice to learn that and feel the air against the skin and the rush.

It may also help me to alleviate my fears of those edges. I'm afraid to death of heights. I wasn't always. NEVER had that problem when I was a teenager. I hate the way it restricts my life. I'm afraid of deep water. Again, I hate the feeling and restriction.

So anyway, long story short, I'm the same way when Master pushes my edges. It helps me to grow. It makes me feel alive again. It makes my head spin and we grow stronger, better, deeper as a couple and I love being able to surrender my all to him again and again and having to put my life literally in his hands. If I did not trust him I would never allow him to do the things he does to me but he's never given me any reason whatsoever to doubt him. So putting my life in his hands is freeing. I don't have to worry about him not catching me when I fall. I KNOW he'll be there.

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RE: What does Edge Play mean to you? - 7/21/2012 2:31:59 PM

JeffBC

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quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder
Master and I have talked about going skiing together in the future and I want to learn from him how to do that. I haven't skiied since I was really really young. It would be nice to learn that and feel the air against the skin and the rush.

In my youth I thought that perhaps highly illegal and extremely hallucinatory substances would go well with night-time downhill skiing. I also wasn't very clear on what all those black diamonds meant on the signs. It's a great story but I'm not keen on repeating that particular bit of edge play *laughs*

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RE: What does Edge Play mean to you? - 7/21/2012 3:08:25 PM

littlewonder

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lol...well yeah, there was that little bit of edginess going on too lol. But when I was doing those things, I felt alive. There's a line from a song and it says "you bleed just to feel you're alive". Yeah...I want that again.

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RE: What does Edge Play mean to you? - 7/21/2012 3:16:53 PM

JeffBC

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quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder
Yeah...I want that again.

*laughs* And for me, what I mostly remember from the whole experience is suddenly hurtling down an incline that might as well have been vertical with moguls... big moguls... then trying to "pull of" only to end up hurtling through the trees at warp 7... then coming out of the trees back onto the course again only to run through a snow machine which immediately blinded me... still going warp 7 and now with ski lift pylons and crowds of people coming up fast (none of which I could see any more).... all the while waving my arms around willy-nilly in what could only be described as the exact opposite of how James Bond would've handled the situation.

I do cherish the memory. But actual death and/or serious injury for myself and others was a real possibility there.

Like you though, I'm re-exploring the edgy part of life now that I don't need to be so responsible. It's just that I'd prefer a lower mortality rate nowadays.

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RE: What does Edge Play mean to you? - 7/21/2012 3:20:20 PM

littlewonder

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I think for me I like the adrenaline that makes me feel alive because it counteracts my clinic depression....dopamin and seratonine at major amounts swimming in my head and my heading saying "HELL YEAH! Let's get more of that stuff!". The only problem though is the coming down and crashing....haaaard! That's something else entirely and omg how that is awful for a clinical depressive.

so basically I'm going from a major high to a major downer. But thankfully Master understands that and he knows how to help with it so it's not as bad with him as when I would be alone or with people who didn't get it.

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RE: What does Edge Play mean to you? - 7/21/2012 3:34:55 PM

Musicmystery

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quote:

ORIGINAL: JeffBC

quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder
Yeah...I want that again.

*laughs* And for me, what I mostly remember from the whole experience is suddenly hurtling down an incline that might as well have been vertical with moguls... big moguls... then trying to "pull of" only to end up hurtling through the trees at warp 7... then coming out of the trees back onto the course again only to run through a snow machine which immediately blinded me... still going warp 7 and now with ski lift pylons and crowds of people coming up fast (none of which I could see any more).... all the while waving my arms around willy-nilly in what could only be described as the exact opposite of how James Bond would've handled the situation.

I do cherish the memory. But actual death and/or serious injury for myself and others was a real possibility there.

Like you though, I'm re-exploring the edgy part of life now that I don't need to be so responsible. It's just that I'd prefer a lower mortality rate nowadays.

It's funny what we each decide is OK or too much. Not always rational.

Would I sky dive? Not likely. Yet I saw a photo of a hang gilder who rode thermals way over the clouds--I would totally do that.

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RE: What does Edge Play mean to you? - 7/21/2012 3:53:55 PM

littlewonder

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Master and I watch the Warren Miller skiing documentaries and they are absolutely amazing and awesome. It just makes you want to be immersed in the moment.

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RE: What does Edge Play mean to you? - 7/21/2012 4:00:07 PM

ResidentSadist

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quote:

ORIGINAL: samdarella
Oh shit. This is definitely edge play to me. Look Master, it's a squirrel. I'm baking cake. I have boobs. You can put shiny things through them.

Edge play to me is anything that requires lots of skill, concentration and focus to reduce the risk of harm. Lol. Or almost anything that was a hard limit a year and a half ago. Still requires a lot of trust. Yes that might sum it up. Things that make my rational brain say wtf are you doing. Then the zen part kicks in and I surrender myself.

What I consider edgy has changed over time. And yes I do want to keep moving towards the edge. I want to look over the precipice and feel the fear. To step off and soar. To feel Him controlling me the whole way.

LMAO . . . you bake that cake baby and yes you certainly do have boobs which could only be enhanced by putting some shiny slave rings in them. Don't worry about being scared while underwater. I am compassionate and I'll cater to fears by giving you a blindfold like they do at executions . . . oh wait, that would only make worse wouldn't it? My bad.

I agree with what so many have said about edge play being personal. But I think there should be a general definition to what edge play is so we can communicate with each and have a concept of what it means when someone identifies as being an edge player. Is it risk? I am pretty sure driving a car leads to fatality more often than edge play. So how do you measure risk? Is it skill as samdarella mentions, something that requires a level of training and skill to execute safely? My first experiments with a bullwhip as a teen didn't come out as planned and cost a small piece flesh. All that we do with ropes, whips, chains, knives and etc can end up badly if done completely wrong. Is rope play edgy . . . well, if you wrap it around someones neck and bring in asphyxiation it is or if you leave someone tied too tight for extended periods.

I don't have an answer, a universal definition of edge pay. All I have is an impression from years of exposure. That impression is that if the situation and equipment can be dangerous, even with a given expectation of skill, there can be nasty ramifications, it is edge play.

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RE: What does Edge Play mean to you? - 7/21/2012 6:43:24 PM

Moonlightmaddnes

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quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder

I used to be edgy when I was young. I would ride my bike down mountains with no brakes and just the wind through my hair, I would climb mountains, I did cuttings, I was a goth child, was part of the raves and underworld clubs, etc....I loved it.

But after I had a child I just couldn't bring myself to do that stuff again and it all scared me to death. I became extremely safe. Safety was/is still my comfort zone. I like safe.

BUT I also like the edge and now that my daughter is all grown and I'm once again....free. I'm learning to let loose and let go again. It's not a quick progression but it is fun along the way. I'm now remembering the fun I had when I was young and now I'm like "hey, you're free to do anything you want now. Why NOT jump off that bridge with just a bungee cord?? You used to love it before".

So while I have not progressed that far yet, I would really like to get back to that. I want to live again. I want to feel again. I don't want to be a mindless, mushy, drone just going through the daily routine anymore. I don't have to so why do it??

I love when Master and I share stories about our wild days. It brings an energy, a spark that I haven't felt in over 20 years, and I like the way that feels!! I like the rush. I like the adrenaline. I like the fun.

Master and I have talked about going skiing together in the future and I want to learn from him how to do that. I haven't skiied since I was really really young. It would be nice to learn that and feel the air against the skin and the rush.

I can relate. I was so wild as a teenager. I cringe at some of the shit I pulled and wonder how the hell I survived. I was beyond wild and into plain old trying to get myself killed stupid. Then I met my husband got pregnant and suddenly just like you went into safe mode.

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RE: What does Edge Play mean to you? - 7/21/2012 6:59:55 PM

littlewonder

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Amazing how that happens huh? LOL

But being an empty nester now, I'm ready for at least some kind of wildness back...maybe not like I was as a teenager but a more controlled wildness...skiing, mountain biking, who knows what else....paragliding, bungee jumping and there's always sessions with Master. lol

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RE: What does Edge Play mean to you? - 7/21/2012 7:51:53 PM

Moonlightmaddnes

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Oh yes it is amazing. We were getting back into controlled craziness when I got a positive pregnancy test. So we are not doing anything remotely unsafe anymore.

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