RE: Tired of looking? (Full Version)

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sublizzie -> RE: Tired of looking? (6/8/2006 4:03:03 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: cuddleheart50

I think I have found someone, lets all hope it works out!!!!


I'll keep my fingers crossed for you.



aurora31 -> RE: Tired of looking? (6/8/2006 4:09:03 AM)

Micheal...like you I was reluctant to get out and involved r/t. I always had some reason I could not. But then I finally managed to save for a new car. I now drive 3 1/2 hrs almost every weekend to StL. And will be moving there as soon as I can find a job. Anyway getting involved r/t has been great I have made many new friends and I have a meet someone who I am very interested in seeing where things go. Still to early to tell but so far everything is a go. I wish I had found away to do this sooner. It is well worth the effort and inconvience. And $ for gas...which is about to kill me...lol.

Best of luck
aurora



champagnewishes -> RE: Tired of looking? (6/8/2006 4:16:10 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: cuddleheart50

I think I have found someone, lets all hope it works out!!!!


I hope its all that you hoped for and more cuddles!

Michael...i'm so damn tired of it, i can't get out of bed.  It sucks.  Enough was enough with the last Dom i met here who said and did all the right things for two weeks before revealing the weak, immature creature that he really was.  If i have to read one more email stating that they are the center of the universe and i should appreciate that i am even allowed to exist in it, i think i am going to puck.  The only thing i can count on in my bed is my dog who sleeps on my feet every night.  Even my wet dreams have gone dry.  I long ago quit working which allows me to continue searching  24/7 to finding the One and i am still no closer now than i was then.  So i posted two weeks ago in my profile that i am taking a break.  Instead, i am now watching reruns of Law & Order all day long.
 
There, does that answer your question?



michaelGA2 -> RE: Tired of looking? (6/8/2006 5:23:22 AM)

i do NOT feel sorry for myself..i feel sorry for those who will never know my submission. i thought i made this clear in the past. STOP TWISTING THINGS. I have NO self-pity...got that?



michaelGA2 -> RE: Tired of looking? (6/8/2006 5:26:36 AM)

Again...enough of this "feeling sorry for myself" BS...i feel sorry for others, can we all get THAT straight...???



michaelGA2 -> RE: Tired of looking? (6/8/2006 5:28:19 AM)

Let's move on...this is for those who feel the same way as me...not for those who come here to bash ME...let others have a say damn it.



Aileen68 -> RE: Tired of looking? (6/8/2006 5:37:26 AM)

Michael...the happiest you ever sounded was when you went to that munch.  I take it that you haven't gone back to another.  Maybe you should.



michaelGA2 -> RE: Tired of looking? (6/8/2006 5:39:15 AM)

the last couple of months the munches have coincided with something else, last month was a baquet for work and this month i'll be on vacation...i plan on going next month...nothing foreseen then.



Kindred2Evil -> RE: Tired of looking? (6/8/2006 7:10:18 AM)

I think everyone gets tired of looking.  Sheesh I know I have at times.  That's when I quit looking and start acting.  I live in a teeeeeny tiny little town in the middle of nowhere and I do mean Nowhere.  The closest city that has kinky people is an hour away.  It's worth the drive.  Hell, they even have a bus that runs from here to there and back twice a day. 
With me it's a matter of priorities.  What's more important?  Me sitting here being all bluesy about not having a submissive or going out and finding one.  I talk to several people I've met through this site that are great, granted nothing will come of it due to distance (which is when I curse the net lol) but it's still nice to be able to have conversations that revolve around WIIWD.
It gets frustrating as hell sometimes, that's when you either buck up or shut up.  And I have to agree with some of what's been posted...it's when I stopped looking and just went about my day to day that in the past I have had one fall into my lap. 
Hubby and I are currently friends with another couple we met off another site unrelated to BDSM, met them, had dinner and during the course of the evening found out he's submissive and she's a sadist.  It rocked!  We get to play with them on occassion which relieves the stress.
Just don't give up and get depressed.  People enjoy talking to someone who's upbeat and positive.



MistressLorelei -> RE: Tired of looking? (6/8/2006 8:00:40 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: michaelGA2

i do NOT feel sorry for myself..i feel sorry for those who will never know my submission. i thought i made this clear in the past. STOP TWISTING THINGS. I have NO self-pity...got that?


Michael,

It wasn't long ago that you changed your status to 'Switch', and were tossing around the idea of training as, and seeking a relationship as a Dominant.  Not that there is anything wrong with that.... but perhaps you should first discover yourself before someone else can discover you.  Best of luck on that endeavor.



FirmhandKY -> RE: Tired of looking? (6/8/2006 8:12:07 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: michaelGA2

i do NOT feel sorry for myself..i feel sorry for those who will never know my submission. i thought i made this clear in the past. STOP TWISTING THINGS. I have NO self-pity...got that?


Ok .... so .... you don't believe that you have "self-pity" but a great number of people see "self pity" in your words.

Perhaps you've never heard the saying "perception is reality" or the phrase "you speak your world into existence".  Both hold gems of truth in them.

You ask for advice and input.  You get the same general information about how others perceive you, yet you discount that advice because you don't want to face the actual, real issue about how you come across to others.

Negativity always is a turn off.  ALWAYS.

You come across as negative.  You turn people off.

What, if anything, you do to change that is in your hands, and your hands alone.

But ranting back at people who are giving you good advice ... makes you seem more negative, not less.

Personally, my advice is that you should completely stop any search for a  woman, and go out and expand yourself: mentally, physically, emotionally, educationally.  Take classes in college.  Read some good books.  Get involved in an outdoor hobby.  Hike the Appalachian trail.  Start hang-gliding.  Keep a journal.  Write a book.  Build a house.  Collect comic books.  Start a business.  Volunteer to help in a hospice.  Help run a Special Olympics event.  Get some prospective in your life, and stop focusing on what you can't do or accomplish, and start focusing on things that you CAN do and accomplish.

If you don't, the negative feedback loop will eventually make you a bitter, lonely old man.

If you do change your focus from the negative, to the positive, one day you'll wake up with the most beautiful woman in the world, and wonder how the hell that happened.

"Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans." (John Lennon).  If you aren't enjoying the ride, get on another bus.

FHky






BreakMeShakeMe -> RE: Tired of looking? (6/8/2006 8:20:58 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: michaelGA2

i do NOT feel sorry for myself..i feel sorry for those who will never know my submission. i thought i made this clear in the past. STOP TWISTING THINGS. I have NO self-pity...got that?


Oh I see... it's others fault that they'll never know your submission... because you won't get out there and allow them to experience you... you want them to come to you.. not you to them....I got it now.... putz....



OedipusRexIt -> RE: Tired of looking? (6/8/2006 8:21:08 AM)

To the OP:

I know the feeling, and as you can see, so do many others.  Not sure any advice would matter, but I do think you find things best by not looking.

I'm content with the forums as entertainment and occasional education.   This isn't a place for me to find a partner... Beyond that, this site is merely a microcosm of real life, only with avatars...



michaelGA2 -> RE: Tired of looking? (6/8/2006 2:40:19 PM)

well, now that i have weeded out (blocked) all those who have nothing better to do than to slam me...maybe now things will take a turn for the better. let's move on to other people and see what they have to say ABOUT  THEMSELVES (not me).



SilverWulf -> RE: Tired of looking? (6/8/2006 3:11:21 PM)

Others have said they found someone after they had stopped looking.

Add Me to that list as well.  I had given up after searching for many years.  I was extremely bitter, angry, (feeling) lonely, depressed, etc...  I finally threw up My hands and said "Fluck it!"

I got out of the house and became involved in other activities.  I went back to school to learn a new trade.  I started rock climbing again, which I had given up years earlier.  I bought a motorcycle and started going on poker runs and rides.  I learned woodworking.  I returned to My passion, metal working.  I started spending more time in the garage making things than I did in the house.  I cancelled the memberships I had on all the online sites and began to live a life away from the computer.

After so many years of doing one thing, it was very hard to change ingrained habits and do something else.  It was definitely a struggle.  I would find myself mindlessly logging onto the internet and almost automatically typing in the URL to a BDSM 'match' site.

I (mistakenly) had a couple of vanilla relationships.  Not a good idea... lol.

I happened to run into a longtime friend in a store one day.  He invited Me to a party he was throwing that evening.  A house party.  It had been a long time since I had been involved in anything remotely lifestyle and I was feeling much better about myself, so I figured why not.  I went to the party with only one expectation;  I was going to have a fun evening visiting and reconnecting with friends.

That evening I met My girl.  she was there on a whim as well, invited by our mutual friend (Hmmmm...).  We have now been together for over 2 1/2 years and could not be happier.



juliaoceania -> RE: Tired of looking? (6/8/2006 3:15:26 PM)

My mom always told me that a watched pot never boils



meatcleaver -> RE: Tired of looking? (6/8/2006 3:42:03 PM)

A friend arranged for a friend to meet me in Japan to act as an interpreter and show me around. I got more than I bargained for, a new daughter (which wasn't planned) but hell I'm not complaining. We don't live together, being on opposite sides of the world but see each other regularly for a month at a time or that is how it is working out. Life happens when you least expect it![sm=ofcourse.gif]



LadiesBladewing -> RE: Tired of looking? (6/8/2006 3:57:49 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: michaelGA2

i am wondering if i'm the only one here that is getting tired of looking. it seems that this is a neverending game for most people. when does it end...if ever?


Michael,

You know the answer to this question as well as anyone does. It ends when you're ready to walk away. The only person who has any real control over when you start and when you stop is you... and it isn't a life-sentance if you walk away. You can always choose to come back if the mood strikes you.

If you're not getting anything out of this, then walk away. You're not trapped unless you think you are, and you're not a victim unless you allow people to victimize you. Stay, go... whatever you decide. In the end, it's your choice, and your responsibility.

Da'Avatar ZWD

www.klashaan.org



BrattyBottomRN -> RE: Tired of looking? (6/8/2006 4:27:40 PM)

Gotta chime in that I agree... Don't give up and marry vanilla, I did that and I'm sucking wind bigtime for it!  Like champagne I had my perfect Master for about two weeks, who as well brought out his weakness. 

LOL c'est la vie.

I gotta agree with the negativity though.  Perhaps tell people more WHY it is a shame they are missing out on you, or what you are missing out on with wanting to Top.  What is it that makes YOU different?  What is it that makes YOU special?  I agree with trying to get out to r/l too... munches, clubs... hell hit up TES fest in 3 weeks, I'M GOING!  WOO HOO!

GL.



FirmhandKY -> RE: Tired of looking? (6/8/2006 7:25:54 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: michaelGA2

well, now that i have weeded out (blocked) all those who have nothing better to do than to slam me...maybe now things will take a turn for the better. let's move on to other people and see what they have to say ABOUT  THEMSELVES (not me).


Why do I have the feeling that I'm now persona non grata?  [:)]

Sticking your head into the sand ... yeah .. that's the ticket.  Works like a charm, I've heard.  Real positive step you've taken there.  Not.

FHky




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