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Questioning Sexuality - 5/28/2012 1:18:25 AM

PiratesAhoy

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I've always had a thing for both sexes, ever since Elementary. One of my first crushes was a girl named Candace. She was really into sports, and had this incredible smile even then. I kept my crush for her a secret for 5 years, and never saw her again after I left for Early College.

I've always considered myself to be straight, since the few crushes I have had were on mostly guys. But lately I've found myself masturbating to lesbian porn. Just lesbian porn.

I understand I'm young and that my hormones are currently going crazy...but could it be possible that I'm actually bisexual? I mean, I've had a few crushes on girls, but not until recently could I see myself have a long lasting relationship with any of them.

If anyone can offer any advice I'd be very appreciative!

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RE: Questioning Sexuality - 5/28/2012 1:29:25 AM

DarkSteven

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First off, welcome to collarme! I love your profile and username and general attitude.

I never think of porn as really meaning much. There are plenty of men who get off on femdom porn and think they're submissive.

My submissive is an example of how things frequently aren't neat and easy to understand - she's attracted mostly to other women's bodies, but relates better to men's personalities. The only advice I could give is to go out and try things with both sexes.

And just because you're one way now does not mean things will change. Lesbians become bi, bis become straight or gay, slaves become switches, etc.

The question I would have is, do you see yourself as monogamous? If so, you have to make choices. If not, you might end up with a couple.

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RE: Questioning Sexuality - 5/28/2012 2:18:54 AM

JstAnotherSub

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I have been in the same boat you are regarding lesbian porn, on and off, for my entire life. In my 20's I had the chance to be with a woman, and it just wasn't all I had worked it up to be in my mind.

I finally have decided that it is a fantasy. For me, I think it is more about thinking as the doee than the doer. The thing that brought me to that conclusion is how my images of beautiful women changed, as my body did. I now dig lookin at fat chicks-lol.

Just enjoy it. You may be bi, you may not. Who cares? Just enjoy the ride!

edit to add a runaway m

< Message edited by JstAnotherSub -- 5/28/2012 2:57:50 AM >

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RE: Questioning Sexuality - 5/28/2012 2:48:31 AM

LadyConstanze

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Hey, whatever turns you on turns you on, real life might be very different from watching a flick, but if the flick turns you on, go for it. If you feel you want to get involved with a woman and it feels right, go for it, if not, pass...

Who cares about labels? Life is far too short for that!

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RE: Questioning Sexuality - 5/28/2012 4:49:46 AM

kalikshama

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I'm female and have been bisexual for, wow, almost 30 years now, but relationships with women are few and far between and often in a trio with a man. I need an emotional connection with women but used to require much less from a man - I've gotten pickier as I've matured.

When I first discovered BDSM literotica, I read a lot of M-m porn, but I'm definitely not a gay man - your interest in lesbian porn may or may not have significance.

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RE: Questioning Sexuality - 5/28/2012 7:51:53 AM

lizi

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I can understand wanting to tag things neatly and categorize them in slots, it sure makes things easier for yourself, and for passing on information to others. Honestly though, life doesn't always work out that way. Keep an open mind, watch carefully along the way and be discerning about what you want vs what is best for you and just wing it the best you can.

I'm sorry I don't have any sage advice for you, just that some things become clearer as you go along. Try things in order to cross them off the list. Sometimes it's not so much a process of identifying what to call yourself, as a process of narrowing down by elimination. Good luck with things...

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RE: Questioning Sexuality - 5/28/2012 8:04:21 AM

littlewonder

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I personally would classify you curently as a bisexual since you do have an interest in the same sex, even if it's not often. But you're also young yet and I'd say that you may not always be bisexual. Your views may change as you get older. Currently though, at the very very least, I'd say you're curiously bisexual.

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RE: Questioning Sexuality - 5/28/2012 12:43:04 PM

Karmastic

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i agree with littlewonder, and...

sounds like you're bi with a current weight on hetero.

also, as someone discussed above, you can sexually relate to different genders for different reasons, both emotional and physical.

since today's society tends to be serial monogamy, just consider yourself lucky that you have more choices and can enjoy the fruits of love and life.

< Message edited by Karmastic -- 5/28/2012 1:14:45 PM >

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RE: Questioning Sexuality - 5/28/2012 12:57:52 PM

dcnovice

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FR

A college friend once said, "I fall in love with people, not with sexes."

I've always rather liked that.

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RE: Questioning Sexuality - 5/28/2012 1:06:56 PM

angelikaJ

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quote:

ORIGINAL: dcnovice

FR

A college friend once said, "I fall in love with people, not with sexes."

I've always rather liked that.

My best friend said that too.

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RE: Questioning Sexuality - 5/28/2012 4:48:57 PM

Endivius

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I fell in love with sex a long time ago. Now I just use as many people to visit as possible. Oh wait...

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RE: Questioning Sexuality - 5/28/2012 4:57:39 PM

hardcybermaster

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meh, you're 20, go and enjoy everything, then report back here in graphic detail. Most people here are old,disabled or depressed, or all three so please tell us what it's like to be young free and fucking

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RE: Questioning Sexuality - 5/28/2012 6:18:46 PM

PiratesAhoy

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That is definitely a quote I will keep in mind! Thank you!!!

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RE: Questioning Sexuality - 5/28/2012 7:26:04 PM

TNDommeK

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Great quote! Explore, enjoy and forget labels.

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