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Overall Well-Being - 8/24/2011 4:19:11 AM

gorgeoushair

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New issue that I'm tackling/exporing in developing my spiritual path and general health, and I am curious about your ideas: Allowing yourself to be stuck on your body (or other practices), even if SSC, etc., it not a positive experience for your body and spirit -- i.e., it is objectively negative, and therefore can/will injure your overall health and well-being.

Post #: 1

RE: Overall Well-Being - 8/24/2011 4:31:14 AM

myotherself

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totally disagree.

Being struck by the man who loves me is a physical demonstration of how we feel about each other. It gets him hard, it gets me wet. Without pain play, I would not want sex. I went a decade without sex because I thought I was frigid. It wasn't until I "discovered" s&m that I realised I just needed additional sensory input in the form of pain to get aroused.

It is also a way to centre me. To get me to focus on being a slave rather than an independent woman. He slaps my face. I love it. It's humiliating and painful for a few seconds, and then I get a sense of inner peace and calm that hours of meditation still wouldn't produce.

Pain play is good for me because I enjoy it. I looked for someone to give it to me, and that makes me happy. I can't see any negatives at all.

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RE: Overall Well-Being - 8/24/2011 4:45:34 AM

DeviantlyD

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quote:

ORIGINAL: myotherself

totally disagree.

Being struck by the man who loves me is a physical demonstration of how we feel about each other. It gets him hard, it gets me wet. Without pain play, I would not want sex. I went a decade without sex because I thought I was frigid. It wasn't until I "discovered" s&m that I realised I just needed additional sensory input in the form of pain to get aroused.

It is also a way to centre me. To get me to focus on being a slave rather than an independent woman. He slaps my face. I love it. It's humiliating and painful for a few seconds, and then I get a sense of inner peace and calm that hours of meditation still wouldn't produce.

Pain play is good for me because I enjoy it. I looked for someone to give it to me, and that makes me happy. I can't see any negatives at all.

I guess I'm a little more literal than you bunny, I didn't understand what she meant by "stuck". :D
I'm thinking there are other typos as well because the post, as it stands, didn't make sense to me.

Edited to add OP...in case it gets edited. ;)

quote:

ORIGINAL: gorgeoushair

New issue that I'm tackling/exporing in developing my spiritual path and general health, and I am curious about your ideas: Allowing yourself to be stuck on your body (or other practices), even if SSC, etc., it not a positive experience for your body and spirit -- i.e., it is objectively negative, and therefore can/will injure your overall health and well-being.

< Message edited by DeviantlyD -- 8/24/2011 4:47:29 AM >

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RE: Overall Well-Being - 8/24/2011 4:58:21 AM

angelikaJ

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quote:

ORIGINAL: gorgeoushair

New issue that I'm tackling/exporing in developing my spiritual path and general health, and I am curious about your ideas: Allowing yourself to be stuck on your body (or other practices), even if SSC, etc., it not a positive experience for your body and spirit -- i.e., it is objectively negative, and therefore can/will injure your overall health and well-being.

I think for some people that could be the case and if it seems that way for you then by all means re-evalute things.

For me, that is not the case, in this relationship.

There are many reasons why we engage in impact play and other practices: For pleasure; (His and/or mine), for exploration, for catharsis.
In some of these He sets up very specific ground rules so that if it feels off or bad I am to let him know and we won't continue.

In this relationship 'play' has become an extension of the expressions of mutual caring as well as the manifestation of a power-exchange relationship.

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RE: Overall Well-Being - 8/24/2011 5:17:14 AM

myotherself

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I'm a teacher - I tend to read through typos and make assumptions from the general trend

But to add to my original post...in the last couple of weeks I've had to deal with nursing my dying father and then the funeral. Two weeks of hell. During that time I didn't see Master.

Today he came over. He agreed to be very gentle with me because emotionally I'm on a bit of a roller coaster. However when he arrived, I needed physical release. I needed the pain. I got on my knees and begged him to cane me. And every time he stopped, I begged for more.

I knew I could trust him to stop when it was too much...and now a couple of hours later I'm bruised all over and I feel so calm, peaceful and ready to sleep. Something I haven't managed for the past 2 weeks.

A couple of hours of pain gave me what a whole pharmacy full of drugs couldn't.

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RE: Overall Well-Being - 8/24/2011 5:34:19 AM

DesFIP

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Firstly, condolences to the bunny.

OP, if you feel the hits are done with negative intent, or you internalize that as being negative, then it isn't good for you. For others, who have no negative emotions attached to it, the situation may well be otherwise.

Is a karate competition negative in and of itself? That involves being struck, kicked, hit, etc. How about a high school football game? There's a lot of striking going on there. Yet my now college freshman is wistful about his high school football career, wishing it wasn't over or that he was good enough to play college ball. He feels nothing negative about it.

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Post #: 6

RE: Overall Well-Being - 8/24/2011 7:28:21 AM

stoni23

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is this thread for real?

OP: if you don't like it, don't do it. Nobody is forcing you to do anything.

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RE: Overall Well-Being - 8/24/2011 7:47:34 AM

OsideGirl

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quote:

ORIGINAL: gorgeoushair
Allowing yourself to be stuck on your body (or other practices), even if SSC, etc., it not a positive experience for your body and spirit -- i.e., it is objectively negative, and therefore can/will injure your overall health and well-being.

Well, I guess I'll have to tell the masseuse stop with that thumping, deep tissue massage because it's bad for my spiritual and physical well being.

I have a degree in psychology: if you're engaging BDSM because of self esteem issues then yes, it would be damaging. But then again, so would be sleeping with 50 guys to salve your self esteem.

In somebody that is considered mentally healthy, BDSM is just considered kinky sex and somebody that processes things differently.

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Post #: 8

RE: Overall Well-Being - 8/24/2011 8:33:51 AM

NuevaVida

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I was seeing a man for a short time, who was studying Buddhism. In his class, he had to give a presentation on Paradox, and used BDSM as his example. He wrote of "Do No Harm" and of how in the cases where one party is dominant over another, and the dominant party expects and engages the submissive party in physical pain, psychological humiliation, bondage, and restraints, it could easily be viewed as doing harm. Yet, if the submissive party experiences joy and pleasure from such activity and actually desires it, no harm is actually done. In this case, it is the intention of the dominant party to provide mutual benefit, and not harm. In this case, such activity is beneficial to the submissive party.

Hence, paradox.

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Post #: 9

RE: Overall Well-Being - 8/24/2011 8:35:53 AM

littlewonder

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I guess we'll have to tell the Zen practitioners who strike themselves not to because it's bad for their spiritual health and some Catholics who self flagellate. They can't do that! It's bad for them. I guess someone forgot to let them know.

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Post #: 10

RE: Overall Well-Being - 8/24/2011 9:11:04 AM

EmeraldQueen

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The guy I'm with now is in the progress of moving from Catholisism, to Judism, and though religion doesnt play a big part in MY life, he brought the idea of if Buddism and meditation to me.

My job is very hectic, as is my home life. Im under constant stress, and while good sex WILL help for a little while, Im still VERY insecure about the way I am, and sometimes I just can't get my brain to shut OFF.

Meditaton has brought something for me that all the anti-anxiety drugs couldn't. And yes, physical attention does help for a little while, as someone previously mentioned spanking and caning, I find that sometimes not even subspace is enough to keep my thoughts from running rabid.

Meditation has become key to me trying to find my inner peace, and I'd reccomend it for anyone.

(in reply to littlewonder)

Post #: 11

RE: Overall Well-Being - 8/24/2011 9:36:58 AM

Epytropos

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I'm not saying orthodoxy is inherently bad, but do not allow it to cloud your mind such that you cannot perceive the ideas of others. What you see as negative others see as positive. Neither are correct in the general case, but most are correct in terms of their own experiences.

< Message edited by Epytropos -- 8/24/2011 9:37:22 AM >

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RE: Overall Well-Being - 8/24/2011 1:12:11 PM

RaspberryLemon

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Personally I do not understand or see the benefit or enjoyment in any sort of pain. I have a hard time empathizing with those who do enjoy it or find it beneficial, because I just don't get it. But if they like it, what's wrong with it?

The human body heals. Bruises or even minor lacerations are commonplace and disappear within a matter of days. As long as permanent, severe, or irreversible damage is not done to the body, I see no problem with it. Some people like it, some don't. I don't personally, but it's not up to me to decide what other people should be doing inside their own escapades or relationships. If they enjoy having pain be a part of that, it's their decision and there's nothing really wrong with that unless it's causing real psychological or severe physical harm to someone.

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Post #: 13

RE: Overall Well-Being - 8/24/2011 1:27:24 PM

gorgeoushair

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It has been rightly point out to me that the word I intended was "struck" not "stuck" on your body...

Sorry for the typo and confusion...

(in reply to myotherself)

Post #: 14

RE: Overall Well-Being - 8/24/2011 1:28:26 PM

gorgeoushair

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Thank you, sorry for the confusion. The intended word is "struck" not "stuck."
Apologies

(in reply to angelikaJ)

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RE: Overall Well-Being - 8/24/2011 1:30:47 PM

DesFIP

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OP, if it's spiritually bad for you to engage in consensual s & m, is it also spiritually bad for you to choose to eat spicy foods? That's painful also and could be thought of as worse because it's self inflicted. Care to share your thought processes as to why you believe this?

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Post #: 16

RE: Overall Well-Being - 8/24/2011 1:31:59 PM

gorgeoushair

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Thanks for your response. This thread is not about being forced to do anything.

(in reply to OsideGirl)

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RE: Overall Well-Being - 8/24/2011 1:32:02 PM

mnottertail

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I am just hoping that farting is not a 'spiritual' question, because I am devoid of soul, comes to that.

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Post #: 18

RE: Overall Well-Being - 8/24/2011 1:33:42 PM

gorgeoushair

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It is a new concept for me and I am merely exploring the possibility. Thanks for your response.

(in reply to gorgeoushair)

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RE: Overall Well-Being - 8/24/2011 1:35:15 PM

gorgeoushair

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Thanks, I really appreciate your thoughtful response. Gives me ideas to consider...

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Post #: 20

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