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RE: Unnecessary Roughness - 7/25/2011 7:05:05 AM

NuevaVida

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I believe brilliant gems of knowledge and information can come from all sources. That said, I might take with a grain of salt advice that comes from someone whose life is messed up, but I'll still hear (read) what they have to say, for the most part. I won't close myself off to potential tools simply because the source is questionable - Instead, I'll weight it against my own life, values and principles, and see if they fit.

The two wonderful therapists I've seen in my lifetime weren't about telling me how to do things right - they were really good at holding up a mirror and letting me see what my issues were and what might be a better path to take. They had the tools to do that, and the knowledge to execute that exercise. Perhaps if I saw them out in public behaving questionably, I'd question their credibility, but I only saw them in a limited environment, where the focus was on my life, not theirs.

On these message boards, yes, there are folks who dish out advice that I disagree with, and I might think, "How's THAT workin for ya?" but they're still capable of sharing wisdom that I might be able to incorporate into my own life. Someone whose life and philosophies are more in alignment with my own, however, would likely be heard or read with a greater focus, or more seriousness. If it's someone whose life/relationship I have respect and admiration for, they'll have more credibility from the get-go with me. But that doesn't mean anyone else's contribution is automatically dismissed.

I'm open to knowledge that enhances my life, so I try not to close myself off to those who are sharing it.

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RE: Unnecessary Roughness - 7/25/2011 7:11:22 AM

Icarys

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quote:

Perhaps if I saw them out in public behaving questionably, I'd question their credibility, but I only saw them in a limited environment, where the focus was on my life, not theirs.

If one is looking for real growth then that's how it should be.

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RE: Unnecessary Roughness - 7/25/2011 7:41:54 AM

Epytropos

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Termyn8or

That and that said, do you consider these shows to be informative or what ? I really wonder. Would you call Marcus Welby for medical advice ?

T^T

I don't know the show, so I can't really speak to that. I'm not much for reality TV.

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RE: Unnecessary Roughness - 7/25/2011 11:21:16 AM

tiggerspoohbear

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Psychiatrists are book trained, at least here in Canada. The only province to make them take any type of counselling courses to actually help their patients and pay more attention than just the drugs is Manitoba. They, for the most part, have no real life experience or bedside manner, so to speak, because they weren't taught that. Of 5 I've dealt with so far in a long number of years, I've had problems with all 5. They pull out the scrip pad really fast but they don't take the time to talk to the person sitting in front of them once diagnosed.

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RE: Unnecessary Roughness - 7/25/2011 3:21:43 PM

DomImus

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quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact
In many areas, I find that folks who have gotten past their own issues are the best folks who can advise others. However, if I had two options of professionals, one who has conquered their own issues and one who has not, I would be seeking the council of the former. I'm very fond of proven success.

So this isn't so much about who is giving you the best advice. It's about whose advice makes you feel the best. That is certainly a reasonable yardstick with which to measure by but it's still no guarantee that you are getting the best advice.

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RE: Unnecessary Roughness - 7/25/2011 3:32:33 PM

GreedyTop

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I have yet to meet a therapist who will share with me the things that are going on in their private lives, so I really have NO idea if their life is a mess or not.

My mother was a licensed MFCC in CA (marriage, family, child counselor). It is apparently a requirement in CA (which, from what I understand, has the toughest licensing laws) that ANYONE who wants to be a licensed psychologist, MUST ALSO attend counseling for themselves.

ETA: the effective counselors I have had were ones that did NOT advise me, did NOT tell me what I should do.. but helped me to come to teh realization on my OWN on the potential paths I could take to get shit resolved. This was done by asking questions of me, asking me what I hoped to GET out of any given situations, etc.

They were more like Jiminy Cricket than problem solvers/

YMMV.

< Message edited by GreedyTop -- 7/25/2011 3:36:15 PM >

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RE: Unnecessary Roughness - 7/25/2011 6:22:40 PM

tiggerspoohbear

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What Greedy said. Any therapist worth his/her salt will NOT lead you to water. They'll let you get there yourself having figured it out all on your lil lonesome. They're there to help you get better, not to tell you what to do. Hell, any bozo could do that. I've been through a few counselors, psychologists and psycho-therapists to know the ones who helped me the most were the ones who let me come to my own realization without directly telling me what to do and how to get it done. They encourage, they ask questions, they "hmmm" a lot, but once you've realized something on your own, it's a feeling of accomplishment that can't ever be taken away from you.

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RE: Unnecessary Roughness - 7/25/2011 6:41:18 PM

erieangel

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quote:

As you might know, erie, I can respect anyone who can focus on being a professional. In many areas, I find that folks who have gotten past their own issues are the best folks who can advise others. However, if I had two options of professionals, one who has conquered their own issues and one who has not, I would be seeking the council of the former. I'm very fond of proven success.

LadyP, I still have a lot of issues; I've not worked through them all yet in my own life. I know what I should be doing to correct and overcome my issues, but for some reason, as LadyC said in another post, I am unable to integrate the same action plans I teach my clients into my own life.

And yes, Peon, many people who enter the mental health field are either mental health patients or have a family member or close friend who is one.

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