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RE: pain tolerance - 7/2/2011 5:22:21 PM

fadedshadow

Posts: 751
Joined: 4/27/2009
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i think you're right. another thing that's changed about my mindset is i'm not really only submissive anymore. like i'm only really submissive when i play, but in life i approach everything with a dominant attitude. what's funny is mistress figured this out about me before i did lol. i wonder if this could have an effect on my tolerance.

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RE: pain tolerance - 7/3/2011 12:12:22 AM

MaamJay

Posts: 2101
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Hi faded

Most people I know (my sub self definitely included) find that pain tolerance diminishes when you don't exercise it, and increases again when you do, as per the other responses here. Focusing directly on you, the weight loss would make a difference, less padding equals the pain nerve endings being essentially closer to the surface of the skin where the pain is being inflicted. The change in your life circumstances, feeling happier etc may also make a difference, there may have been part of your psyche craving the pain almost as an atonement for your perceived deficiencies. Now that is less relevant to you. Being sub and feeling the pain may also have been a way to meet your need to fit in, to be wanted and needed by someone, and that is probably less the case now from what you have said.

However, it is also likely that experiencing more pain again may serve to rebuild your tolerance, as long as you find it still takes you to the nice headspace as it did before. Good luck!

Maam Jay aka violet[A]

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RE: pain tolerance - 7/3/2011 4:25:40 AM

fadedshadow

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MaamJay, you pretty much described how i was perfectly. a year ago, i had a lot of emotional problems and was fighting depression and had a very low opinion of who i was and everything. to me being beaten severely was the only reprieve i could find and my tolerance for pain was very high back then. i wonder if there are other forms of play that i could possibly engage in so that i can last longer, given my lowered tolerance for physical pain

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Post #: 23

RE: pain tolerance - 7/4/2011 12:20:04 AM

MaamJay

Posts: 2101
Joined: 9/2/2005
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Well a slow build up with pain play usually helps. So instead of someone just getting into heavy blows straight off as you might have been able to cope with before, starting soft and gradually intensifying once the skin is warmed up and pink helps you endure more. So does stopping after a few blows (I usually make it every 5) and running a hand over the area, to the sub it feels as though the hand is rubbing out or erasing the pain. That usually allows them to take more too. Playing to a safe word call of "orange" meaning that's about as intense a single blow as I can take right now is also very effective, as it leaves the Dominant in control. They can back off the intensity a little, and then gradually build it again (assuming all other indicators, skin colour and condition for example, indicate this is feasible). Much better than going straight to RED which often leaves the sub feeling bad, as if they have failed. A final pain play suggestion is to try a different implement, avoid stingy/whippy (such as a cane or singletail) and go for more thud (such as a full fall flogger without knots or braids).

There are of course, LOTS of other forms of play that don't entail so much pain which can also be very satisfying in terms of space-inducement. Fine needles, judicious use of wax etc are often not anywhere near as painful as envisaged. I've not perved your profile, but many find various forms of bondage pleasurable, and predicament bondage is more of a mental torture than a physical one. Hot and cold give great sensations, especially when applied to different sides of the body. Similarly with pain and pleasure eg tweak or clamp one nipple and suck the other ... especially if the sub is blindfolded, it can get to be a real mindfuck. Just a few ideas here!

Ma'am Jay aka violet[A]

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Post #: 24

RE: pain tolerance - 7/4/2011 4:28:05 AM

CeriseNin