Phone play suggestions? (Full Version)

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KiGirl -> Phone play suggestions? (6/13/2011 6:10:44 PM)

Okay. So I've been communicating with a submissive male across the country from me for almost a year. We have amazing chemistry; he's basically everything I look for in a partner, on a variety of kink and vanilla levels.

Unfortunately, neither of us has the funds to meet in real life. We just recently had our first phone session, and...to be perfectly honest, it was wildly hot. We talked about the stories we've been exchanging, about our (minimal) experiences and fantasies. I could hear his voice tremble when the questions made him nervous or excited. Listening to him mutter "please, Ki" between gasps was possibly the sexiest thing I've ever heard...but I digress.

In spite of the fun we had, I was sometimes fishing for ways to keep the sexy momentum going. I'm basically a newbie at 1)phone play in general and 2) dominating the play. I can be pretty creative, but could use some starter ideas. So here are some questions:

To those of you with long-distance experience, what sorts of over-the-phone play has worked best?

What things didn't work?

What fantasies can be fulfilled when only our voices can cross the gap?

Neither of us is very comfortable with cameras, and his experience is mostly self-imposed or entirely theoretical, so simple suggestions are appreciated. Thanks in advance for your input!



SylvereApLeanan -> RE: Phone play suggestions? (6/13/2011 6:16:18 PM)

There are some threads in the archives with good suggestions for online activities.  If you do a search using the keywords "online play" and "online training" you should turn up some hits.  Those could probably be adapted to phone play.  I'm afraid I can't give you more help than that.  I'm a hands-on sort of person.  At minimum, I like to have YIM or Skype for the added fun of the camera.



smartyypants -> RE: Phone play suggestions? (6/13/2011 9:33:17 PM)

I used to do online play. I found it very frustrating but with some imagination, allow me to suggest:
Spanking: with any implement, you could make him count and loud enough so you can hear it. It's quite humiliating to spank yourself. Especially if he is kneeling beside his own bed, penis between the mattress and box spring, leaning on the bed, phone in hone hand, some implement in the other.
Have fun!



KiGirl -> RE: Phone play suggestions? (6/13/2011 9:43:38 PM)

Thanks, smartypants and SylvereApLeanan! That's a start.

Thanks for the useless snark, Nocturnal, but I'm not sure logic is really your best argument. Logically, shouldn't we keep our elitism to a minimum and acknowledge that attributes other than money factor into our selection of playmates?

Sorry if I accidentally poached someone's avatar...fixed. Still getting used to the boards.



SylvereApLeanan -> RE: Phone play suggestions? (6/13/2011 9:52:44 PM)

Best of luck, KiGirl.  No worries about the avatar.  It's one of the stock options and anyone can use them.  Your photo is cute though, so feel free to stick with that.  [:D]



Awareness -> RE: Phone play suggestions? (6/13/2011 10:19:07 PM)

  What you're doing is creating a shared mental space in which your imaginations can play - however the critical aspect is that your personality is expressed in your voice.  Vocal tonality is important and an awareness of hypnotic suggestion and trance states will also assist.  Trance states distance your target from the outside world and suggestion directs attention where you want it to go.

Make no mistake though - the ideas you're putting forward must also excite you.  Otherwise your interaction will be lacking.  And don't direct them to do things to themselves.  Telling someone to do something is crude.  Instead, inform them you're taking ownership of a part of their body and then direct that part to do as you will.

Above all remember that you're using your minds to create a sensual experience.  So focus on describing and dictating those sensations.  Sights, sounds, smells, pleasure and pain.  Control the rhythm of that pleasure and pain, position yourself in that shared space with your partner and describe those fantasies you want to explore.

It's a poor substitute for fucking in person but I always find imaginative women are hotter in the sack.




kalikshama -> RE: Phone play suggestions? (6/14/2011 5:17:20 AM)

quote:

To those of you with long-distance experience, what sorts of over-the-phone play has worked best?


I was in a LD relationship for 6 months before I moved to be with him. (Alas, it did not work out in person, but that 6 months was delightful.)

He had a friend in my area who he sent up to spend the weekend with me. He choreographed our activities. That was hot!

Most of our phone time was more service/submissive related than sexual:
- When I was at a restaurant, he'd review the menu with me and tell me what to eat. (He would inquire as to my preferences and allergies.)
- I would perform Internet research for him
- Once we decided that we would live together and share expenses, he started taking financial control. I didn't have to ask him for permission to pay for gas, but rather would tell him every penny I'd spent. (This dynamic ended up not working for me and I wouldn't repeat it, but it was hawt while it lasted.)
- Etc., etc., etc. - lots of little control things. He was very much in charge of my life.



KnightofMists -> RE: Phone play suggestions? (6/14/2011 8:23:37 AM)

I suggest having him put the phone on vibrate.. stick it up his ass and then call him repeatedly!!!!



SylvereApLeanan -> RE: Phone play suggestions? (6/14/2011 11:04:34 AM)

Oh she knows.  She just hasn't caught on yet.
 
For the OP:
 
I forgot to ask if you're specifically looking for play scenarios or if you're open to other types of training techniques such as journaling and so forth.  Even if your guy isn't into cam play, getting him to keep a journal for you to read could be very useful for you.  Specific writing assignments could inspire your next play session.  If you're both open to this idea, I suggest Training With Miss Abernathy by Christina Abernathy.  This book contains many exercises you could adapt to your needs.



sexisubi -> RE: Phone play suggestions? (6/15/2011 9:49:31 AM)

using a wet toothbrush over girls panties on his... goobles! writing dirty stories to each other, finding songs for each other, talking on the computer can be so much easier then the phone. having him drink out of a bowl on the floor yeah you cant see it but he might like it! :) you both know each other now its a matter of using what you know about each other to be creative =)



sexyred1 -> RE: Phone play suggestions? (6/15/2011 10:02:02 AM)

I don't think it needs to be so complicated...if you and he are really into each other, you just describe what you want to do to each other.

That works for me when I am traveling and cannot physically be with someone.

It helps that my voice is pretty hot. :)



VideoAdminTheta -> RE: Phone play suggestions? (6/15/2011 11:04:21 AM)

Over half this thread has been removed for being off topic, inflammatory or responding to removed posts. Please remain on topic and resist the temptation to make personal attacks.

Thank you



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