RE: Nobody loves me (Full Version)

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LookieNoNookie -> RE: Nobody loves me (6/12/2011 6:16:26 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LillyBoPeep

i'm so totally in your area but, alas! -- i have to stay here in Jupiter to help my sick mother! if only you could spare a little bit of change and bring me there?  oh and i'm totally a citizen but i need new copies of my documents, cause i had to use them to start a fire in my poor old mother's cold, damp house! oh and i'm totally free of disease, but could you help me get my vaccines updated, too?
i promise, i'm so totally in love with you!



SHIT!!!!!!

I'm not a Dom.

Dammit!!!   Stand up and hold your hands palms up!

Wait....hold on a sec.....KNEEL and hold your palms up.....wait.....just a sec....I'll get this right.....put your palms down and kneel with your knee's up, eyes down....holding a glass in your left hand....filled with beer of course....and dammit....slap me.....(oh...wait...that wasn't very Dom'ish.....I'll get back to you on this...)



LookieNoNookie -> RE: Nobody loves me (6/12/2011 6:17:33 PM)

(Were you considering becoming a Domme?)




LookieNoNookie -> RE: Nobody loves me (6/12/2011 6:21:03 PM)

Where the fuck is Jupiter?



sunshinemiss -> RE: Nobody loves me (6/12/2011 6:24:54 PM)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7Xf-Lesrkuc



LadyHibiscus -> RE: Nobody loves me (6/12/2011 6:28:00 PM)

Okay. Sunny and have agreed to share you. Problem solved!



sunshinemiss -> RE: Nobody loves me (6/12/2011 6:31:31 PM)

That's right.  We agree to share! YAY~~  I love me some LNN, I love me some Hibalicious... Sounds like a pahlan!



LillyBoPeep -> RE: Nobody loves me (6/12/2011 6:54:44 PM)

jupiter is just on the other side of wherethehellsville; it's a really nice place! 



LookieNoNookie -> RE: Nobody loves me (6/14/2011 10:18:01 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: sunshinemiss

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7Xf-Lesrkuc


Niiiiiiiiice!



BitaTruble -> RE: Nobody loves me (6/15/2011 4:08:14 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: LookieNoNookie



(It's true)....I have a 9 inch dick.

And I can fuck for 3 hours straight.

(4, if I do math in my head while I'm fucking).





If you can do math in your head while you're [sm=sex.gif], you, my dear, are a woman.

[sm=donttaseme.gif]



SternSkipper -> RE: Nobody loves me (6/15/2011 7:08:01 AM)

quote:


Wait....hold on a sec.....KNEEL and hold your palms up.....wait.....just a sec....I'll get this right.....put your palms down and kneel with your knee's up, eyes down....holding a glass in your left hand....filled with beer of course....and dammit....slap me.....(oh...wait...that wasn't very Dom'ish.....I'll get back to you on this...)



Pssssst It's more convincing without the plug in.




LookieNoNookie -> RE: Nobody loves me (6/17/2011 7:18:10 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LillyBoPeep

i'm so totally in your area but, alas! -- i have to stay here in Jupiter to help my sick mother! if only you could spare a little bit of change and bring me there?  oh and i'm totally a citizen but i need new copies of my documents, cause i had to use them to start a fire in my poor old mother's cold, damp house! oh and i'm totally free of disease, but could you help me get my vaccines updated, too?
i promise, i'm so totally in love with you!



This is amazing!

I TOO am free of disease, burned all my citizenship papers in a fire to keep (in my case, an old dying cat with a wooden leg) warm....of course, she was only cold and damp because I'd had too many beers and pissed all over her (and the new lamp my Mom had given me which, unfortunately, fluffy's tail was slightly entangled in....boy did she jump!), fortunately fluffy has all her vaccinations, but when she clawed her way up my spine, I contracted some kind of rare cat/human interface of virus's (had something to do with the feces in her claws and the blood mixing together)....I am sooooo in love with you TOO!

When can we meet?



BendingGender -> RE: Nobody loves me (6/18/2011 1:15:20 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: SternSkipper

quote:


Wait....hold on a sec.....KNEEL and hold your palms up.....wait.....just a sec....I'll get this right.....put your palms down and kneel with your knee's up, eyes down....holding a glass in your left hand....filled with beer of course....and dammit....slap me.....(oh...wait...that wasn't very Dom'ish.....I'll get back to you on this...)



Pssssst It's more convincing without the plug in.




Oh, but it serves a very Domly purpose. You see, after several minu-- er hou-- uh... after many months! of careful study, I've deduced that he comes from a small, Elite tribe of very secretive Domlords high in the mountains of Stickuphisarseistan. He trained with weal, twue Masterz of the Universe. And they've got such rigid .... er, what was I saying again... oh right... such uh... hard standards of excellence that they aspire to. There's a twelve step intensive training program. And only when you become one with the tao of Domliness do you obtain the coveted Almighty Plug. It serves forever as a reminder to conduct oneself in a manner that is both reflective of his studies and pleasing to the Older Than Dirt Color Guard Master Overlords.

In short, it's a rare and treasured tribal artifact that no TRUE Dom would be without. Or at least that's what I was told when they tried to give me a brochure to their in-the-deep-woods retreat.

Sidenote: I've recently discovered that I'm very much like a Gremlin, and shouldn't be fed (especially sugar) after midnight. Pardon the off-topic discussion. I believe the OP was looking for love.



myotherself -> RE: Nobody loves me (6/18/2011 1:19:57 AM)

quote:



I'm just a down home kind of guy, looking for a good woman.



Will a bad woman do?



quote:

ORIGINAL: LookieNoNookie

(It's true)....I have a 9 inch dick.



Awwwww...I really don't dig guys with small willies [:(]





Hippiekinkster -> RE: Nobody loves me (6/18/2011 1:35:49 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: LillyBoPeep

i'm so totally in your area but, alas! -- i have to stay here in Jupiter to help my sick mother! if only you could spare a little bit of change and bring me there?  oh and i'm totally a citizen but i need new copies of my documents, cause i had to use them to start a fire in my poor old mother's cold, damp house! oh and i'm totally free of disease, but could you help me get my vaccines updated, too?
i promise, i'm so totally in love with you!

I wuz wondering about that choice of prepositions, but in is quite appropriate, since Jupiter is a gas giant, and there is no surface to live on.

But I'm guessing that is one fucking ghastly commute.



Hippiekinkster -> RE: Nobody loves me (6/18/2011 1:37:25 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: myotherself

quote:



I'm just a down home kind of guy, looking for a good woman.



Will a bad woman do?



quote:

ORIGINAL: LookieNoNookie

(It's true)....I have a 9 inch dick.



Awwwww...I really don't dig guys with small willies [:(]



I think he means he won the eBay auction for John Holmes' dick, preserved in formaldehyde.



myotherself -> RE: Nobody loves me (6/18/2011 1:39:28 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Hippiekinkster





I think he means he won the eBay auction for John Holmes' dick, preserved in formaldehyde.



oooooh...nasteeeeee!!!!!



Hippiekinkster -> RE: Nobody loves me (6/18/2011 1:43:00 AM)

I could have been rich myself, but I drew the line at selling gourmet Fish Assholes. Apparently some have no such scruples.



myotherself -> RE: Nobody loves me (6/18/2011 6:21:01 AM)

Well, they sell chicken and beef assholes.

Just head for the golden arches...[:'(]



popularDemand -> RE: Nobody loves me (6/18/2011 6:25:55 AM)

never mind.

pD



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