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HeatherMcLeather -> RE: REALLY NEW at this.... (5/28/2011 2:25:02 PM)
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I'm not a great fount of wisdom, having less than a year in this, but from one newbie who's a little further along to another, here's my best advice, in what I think is order of importance.
1. Try your best. That's all you can do. If he won't accept that you can't do everything right the first time, there's a problem. Sure you'll fail, there will be things you're just not ready for yet, or that you need to be worked up to more slowly. Or that you just cannot do no matter how much you may want to. Accept that and don't let yourself think you've failed him because of it.
2. Process things. Don't be afraid of how you feel about things. Like somebody (MasterSlaveLA I think) said, there will be things you don't like and things that will really do a number on your head - the 1st time we did watersports the fact that I loved it really sent me into a loop of self disgust and loathing. think things through and look at your reactions honestly. don't worry at this point if your feelings seem "unsubmissive", they are how you feel and you have to process them, you can't just submerge them, they must be worked through.
3. Talk to HIM. Like MasterSlaveLA said, you need to talk when you feel the need. Not just questions, but also to discuss your feelings and reactions. he needs to know where you're at in your head, both so he knows where and how to proceed, and also so he knows when and where to back off a little. Hanners started a thread on communication rituals a while back that might be helpful, there were some good replies and ideas on there. http://www.collarchat.com/m_3655434/mpage_1/key_/tm.htm#3655915
A lot of people would say "do what he says", and would say that this one should be first, but I disagree. It's not even a consideration at the moment. The whole point of your training is to learn how to do that. That's your goal, once you learn to just do what he says easily and naturally, your training will be complete, so it really can't be considered a way to get through the training.
I may be way off base, but Hanners says I'm a very good slave and these 3 things are how I get through the tough times.
Good luck!
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