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Dom/me, Switch, or sub. - 3/26/2011 1:35:36 AM   
kissheels


Posts: 656
Joined: 3/8/2011
From: Inside Your Mind
Status: offline 		just wondering,

are Fetishits part of the BDSM Community? if yes why does CM not have an option to 'label' Yourself as one in Your Profile

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ßε ϽгϵαҭїѴε Ӏӣvεит α Ƨἐxụᾳḻ Ṕὲṟvἕr§ìοи !!!
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Dom/me, Switch, or sub. - 3/26/2011 1:39:31 AM   
Palliata


Posts: 371
Joined: 8/9/2010
Status: offline 		Bondage, dominance, submission, sadism, masochism.Those are the words BDSM is derived from. None of those a fetish in the traditional sense. So, in the most literal sense, fetishists are not part of BDSM.

EDIT: comma

< Message edited by Palliata -- 3/26/2011 1:40:36 AM >

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I speak not of The Way, but only My Way. Think it not an indictment of Your Way.

I'm male. I know it sounds female. Work with me.

(in reply to kissheels)
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RE: Dom/me, Switch, or sub. - 3/26/2011 4:19:03 AM   
Termyn8or


Posts: 18681
Joined: 11/12/2005
Status: offline 		Technically true maybe. Should I leave ?

The cuff, the strap, whatever. It almost seems pointless without those. Damn, maybe I am a fake and I don't even know it ?

T^T

(in reply to Palliata)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Dom/me, Switch, or sub. - 3/26/2011 4:38:50 AM   
0ldhen


Posts: 2221
Joined: 12/27/2010
From: Henhouse in Trolltopia, Harleyville USA
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Termyn8or

Technically true maybe. Should I leave ?

The cuff, the strap, whatever. It almost seems pointless without those. Damn, maybe I am a fake and I don't even know it ?

T^T


There is a difference in tools for a job and a fetish.

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Everyone crashes. Some get back on. Some don't.

Za'beeta Regal, Et Vogo O' Lurwadra'd Wyka Go Abosh Inunsey.

(in reply to Termyn8or)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Dom/me, Switch, or sub. - 3/26/2011 4:42:39 AM   
VaguelyCurious


Posts: 5264
Joined: 12/2/2009
From: United Kingdom
Status: offline 		I don't know about in the US, but in the UK the fetish scene and the BDSM scene are discrete scenes that have some overlap - I think that's partly driven by the way the UK corner of the internet is set up, with an exclusively BDSM site used to do most of the UK BDSM announcements/organisation/networking, and a separate fetish site (and a separate rubber site for whatever it is that those people do. ) The people in the overlap will have multiple profiles. Sites like Fetlife, however, are much more all-encompassing. Maybe that represents a different set-up in North America? (From what I've heard the Montreal scene, for example, is apparently all fetish and very little BDSM. Maybe people don't make the same distinction.)

So I'd have to say no, they aren't, as a whole, a part of my community -  they have to also have some kind of BDSM orientation(s) to qualify. YMMV if you're from somewhere else.

That's not to say that the CM labelling options aren't woefully inadequate, though, because they are.


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Sthetic on FetLife.




(in reply to Termyn8or)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Dom/me, Switch, or sub. - 3/26/2011 5:37:53 AM   
needlesandpins


Posts: 3901
Status: offline 		i'm not sure i would class myself as a bdsm person in the way that some on here would. nore would i say i have any major defined fetish. i like latex and so does my playmate, we like inflicting and recieving pain, we both like being restrained and so on. we could do any number of things all at the same time, so for me fetish and bdsm are mixed. i don't want a set lable but on here have chosen switch because it's closest to what i am. i'd rather choose something like kinker though. having to lable as switch means that i've had alot of mail from guys wanting to be my sub (although my profile says i'm only here for the forums and to not ask). i guess it must be worse for those who are looking though. people make assumptions based on how you lable yourself.

me, i'm generally an all round kinky pervert.

needles

(in reply to VaguelyCurious)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Dom/me, Switch, or sub. - 3/26/2011 6:19:35 AM   
Lucylastic


Posts: 40310
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Palliata

Bondage, dominance, submission, sadism, masochism.Those are the words BDSM is derived from. None of those a fetish in the traditional sense. So, in the most literal sense, fetishists are not part of BDSM.

EDIT: comma

you missed Discipline

I wouldnt exclude anyone in my "one twue way"
Kinky, perverted, Dom, sub, slave, domme, slut, daddy/babygirl/trans, cd, Femdom,  fifties marriage or Gor.
I have a bondage fetish, I adore latex and leather, strictly Im not a fetishist, but definitions are easily changeable.
Pansexual, and kink and fetish friendly, thas me



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(•_•)
<) )╯SUCH
/ \

\(•_•)
( (> A NASTY
/ \

(•_•)
<) )> WOMAN
/ \

Duchess Of Dissent
Dont Hate Love

(in reply to Palliata)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Dom/me, Switch, or sub. - 3/26/2011 6:37:39 AM   
ChatteParfaitt


Posts: 6562
Joined: 3/22/2011
From: The t'aint of the Midwest -- Indiana
Status: offline 		Why wouldn't fetishists be part of the BDSM community? If you know you are a fetishist, then you have done enough self discovery to have some idea of where you fit in.

As to why CM doesn't have labels for everything, that's more of an admin issue, isn't it? Unless you want to turn it into a "CM is prejudiced against fetishists" issue, in which case, carry on.




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RE: Dom/me, Switch, or sub. - 3/26/2011 11:31:13 AM   
SAMHAIN09


Posts: 207
Joined: 11/8/2010
Status: offline 		Ask a moderator man.

(in reply to ChatteParfaitt)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Dom/me, Switch, or sub. - 3/26/2011 11:45:37 AM   
Palliata


Posts: 371
Joined: 8/9/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Lucylastic

quote:

ORIGINAL: Palliata

Bondage, dominance, submission, sadism, masochism.Those are the words BDSM is derived from. None of those a fetish in the traditional sense. So, in the most literal sense, fetishists are not part of BDSM.

EDIT: comma

you missed Discipline


Damn. I had the sense that I was missing something but it just wasn't coming to me...


_____________________________

I speak not of The Way, but only My Way. Think it not an indictment of Your Way.

I'm male. I know it sounds female. Work with me.

(in reply to Lucylastic)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Dom/me, Switch, or sub. - 3/26/2011 11:53:19 AM   
Lucylastic


Posts: 40310
Status: offline 		happens to all of us
it gets worse with age tooo!


_____________________________

(•_•)
<) )╯SUCH
/ \

\(•_•)
( (> A NASTY
/ \

(•_•)
<) )> WOMAN
/ \

Duchess Of Dissent
Dont Hate Love

(in reply to Palliata)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Dom/me, Switch, or sub. - 3/26/2011 12:05:52 PM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline 		Yes and no.  What VC said about there being overlap is true here, too.  Even at leather events, it's usually in the program somewhere that says we welcome fetishists, too.  (It just gets asked that they respect our protocols during such events.) 

As far as the boxes to check thing, while I really do think that it would be nice if they added the top/bottom designations, at some point, everyone's special little niche is too much.  I'd probably say that 'fetishist' would be in that category.  If you do consider yourself a fetishist who isn't interested in the bondage, discipline, sadism, and masochism part or have no interest in power/authority dynamics, that would be something that probably be a good idea to add to the text of your profile.


_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to Lucylastic)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Dom/me, Switch, or sub. - 3/26/2011 12:16:36 PM   
MaxsBoy


Posts: 766
Status: offline 		It would be nice to have more options here in general.  More gender options would be especially nice (for me, anyway) since at the moment you can only be male, female, or transgendered.  I am none of the above, so I rotate through them.

_____________________________

~Fox~

Packmate of Max

Fukin Trollop, whipping boi, and unapologetic uberslut

I can't shake this feeling in my head
There's a Devil sleeping in my bed

(in reply to LadyPact)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Dom/me, Switch, or sub. - 3/26/2011 2:58:33 PM   
Termyn8or


Posts: 18681
Joined: 11/12/2005
Status: offline 		FR

Maybe I shouldn't leave. Maybe BDSM IS actually a fetish in it's own right. Certainly meets some of the criteria.

T^T

(in reply to MaxsBoy)
Profile   Post #: 14
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