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RE: how an online relationship should work? - 3/11/2011 6:07:22 AM

IronBear

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Well said lass... Some of us had to do the hard yards before we discovered the fallacy and then discovered what was needed to make it work with the right people.

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RE: how an online relationship should work? - 3/11/2011 6:27:23 AM

Lucylastic

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Ive been in a mostly online relationship for almost 13 years.
Im not going to go into the whys or anything, except to say, we both have our lives, we are both married to other people who are well aware of it, and that its what works for us.
I do get to see him, offline as well I couldnt have lasted this long without physical contact,
I have over 9000 emails, I have several movies, hundreds of photos and racked up about a few thousand phone hours, as well as three to four visits a year, I speak to him every day, wether, on phone, cam or online.

Most people couldnt and wouldnt be able to handle it, and I dont blame anyone who couldnt do it, but I dont poke my nose into anyone elses relationships wether offline or on. BTW, its not been sunshine and roses, but we are very much Domme and pet.
You have to know your limitations, you have to keep your perceptions in check and grounded in reality.
Im far from perfect and learned the hard way, as has he.
Weve been there for each other thru death, disaster and many other nasty bits. There have been tears and argument s but mostly lots of talking, and enjoyment to an extent it makes everything else well worth the time. Had we decided to leaves our lives to be together, I dont know how it would have worked out, but I dont think about that .it just IS.
YMMV

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RE: how an online relationship should work? - 3/11/2011 5:21:22 PM

Iskander

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I think the second thing you should Master is the english language..
The first thing to be Mastered is of course always oneself!

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RE: how an online relationship should work? - 3/11/2011 5:38:57 PM

Arpig

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quote:

The thing about online domination is that the slave should accept the cercumstance and be extremely dedicated to make it work.

I was rereading the thread (yeah, I'm bored) and this struck me. Seems to me it would take a fuck of a lot more dedication on the part of the Master than the slave. Maybe this attitude is why you aren't having any luck

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RE: how an online relationship should work? - 3/11/2011 6:32:13 PM

MiladyElaine

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Simply put it is different for everyone. There is no set way to go about it and there shouldn't be! Just because someone doesn't follow the set pattern does not make them fakes.

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RE: how an online relationship should work? - 3/12/2011 1:16:19 AM

MaamJay

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I did online relationships to start out. Once I moved into real ... online generally has no more interest for Me. That said, one of My original online boys has recently found Me and I am thoroughly enjoying his presence in My life again. BUT this is an unusual relationship in that we role play in a fantasy world of My creation and his following (we probably should be somewhere like Second Life!) ... we only chat briefly in our real selves. It is fun, it is creative, it is like writing a story together. It is definitely NOT a typical online D/s relationship! It never has been for us.

However, I also did those early on (both as D and s) and some level of online relationship CAN work but yes, it requires every bit as much interest and dedication from the D as from the s. Perhaps even MORE from the D since they are the initiator! It requires regular contact AND understanding when that doesn't happen because real life gets in the way. It requires honesty and enormous amounts of trust. It requires both parties to be generally secure in themselves and not riddled with fears, insecurity, jealousy etc. It requires sense and sensibility to gauge each other's moods and know when to push and when to leave well alone. It requires maturity to realise what is sensible and practical to ask of someone ... and what is not. If there are other partners involved it requires all that and a whole lot more! And GOOD clear communication ... so if you're a poor typist/speller etc ... use voice and cam and encourage the other to ask a lot of questions for clarification! Without any real time together in meatlife it is very hard to sustain much past a year (in My experience and knowing many others in similar situations) ... good luck!

Maam Jay aka violet[A]

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RE: how an online relationship should work? - 3/12/2011 9:17:18 PM

ResidentSadist

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hmmmm . . . let me count the ways.

Create some mechanical torture devices and mail them to your slave. A simple spanking machine/paddle wheel should be easy enough. For a couple bucks, go to Radio Shack and have one of the geeks hook you up with a relay and a USB interface so you can remotely turn it on and off.

Now, get your slave to put her cell phone on vibrate, wrap it in a condom and stuff it in her snatch. Switch on your cams, have her bend over a chair in front of the wheel and there you have it. You can hurt her or please her on command, by remote, while online. You gotta' do online all the. Like making her sit in chair full of tacks while you call her cell. That way so you can see her cell phone shoot out of her cunt while she squirts until blood and cum run down the chair legs.

It's almost as cool as peanut butter and puppies.

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RE: how an online relationship should work? - 4/1/2011 1:56:55 AM

deb55555

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I find a lot of really unpeasant anger online when it comes to online relationships. there is this sneer about those who play online. im a 19 year old girl and i play online coz im working out what i want. dont sneer at me please.
i find that a relationship largely depends on wot u put in2 it. if u dont put any emotional energy into it then ur online relationships witll be superficial.
when i chat to my online Master or write him every day (500 words, 1000 words, 3000 words) it takes up a lot of time, energy and imagination. that is my submission and my relationship. its important to me. i am not a 'fake' or a 'phony' or any of the other nasty names people use just coz at this stage in my life that is wot i want 2 do.

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RE: how an online relationship should work? - 4/1/2011 5:35:38 AM

Kana

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quote:

ORIGINAL: deb55555

I find a lot of really unpeasant anger online when it comes to online relationships. there is this sneer about those who play online. im a 19 year old girl and i play online coz im working out what i want. dont sneer at me please.
i find that a relationship largely depends on wot u put in2 it. if u dont put any emotional energy into it then ur online relationships witll be superficial.
when i chat to my online Master or write him every day (500 words, 1000 words, 3000 words) it takes up a lot of time, energy and imagination. that is my submission and my relationship. its important to me. i am not a 'fake' or a 'phony' or any of the other nasty names people use just coz at this stage in my life that is wot i want 2 do.

splchek iz ur friendeds. No bodie wil want 2 read what you rite da weigh you right now

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RE: how an online relationship should work? - 4/1/2011 6:41:14 AM

ChatteParfaitt

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I'd like to ask the OP an important question: Are you limiting yourself to online only due to marriage, or because you are still living at home?

If it is because of marriage, you don't have a chance in hell of having a decent online relationship. This makes you a liar and a cheater, and liars and cheaters are not good relationship material, especially when they hook up with a married partner (also a liar and cheater and, therefore, not good relationship material).

Then you have to factor in the available time you have to spend online, on the phone, and on cam. Married cheaters have limited time on the phone or cam, unless of course you're unemployed, which means you'll have all day to cheat on the spouse who is supporting you.

Does this all sound harsh? It's meant to. You are seeking to have a relationship based on honesty and transparency when in order to have that relationship, you have to lie everyday. Not a recipe for success.

Your limited phone and cam time means you will never really know this person, and your relationship, such as it is, will always be based on the wank fodder so very obvious in your pics. In other words, fantasy.

I have nothing against a good fantasy, except when people confuse it with reality. Which, in the case of online relationships, people do. Why? Because all your interaction comes down to words on the page. And the human brain reads into those words what it wants to. This is not a character flaw, its how the mind works. Its why we can read some of the highly illiterate posts made, our brains fill in the blanks for us.

If you are still living at home and are not attached, I would strongly suggest you get over your fear of meeting real time. This fantasy thing you are doing is just fantasy. I know it seems real, but that is just your brain filling on the blanks.

As always, JMO.

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