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Mercnbeth -> The Out of Towner (5/3/2006 9:57:36 AM)
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A beautiful woman decided to relocate to New York to be with her on-line master who she had been collared to for 3 years, but never met. Upon arriving and finding out he was a really a 50 year old overweight, balding city worker living in Queens with his "misunderstanding" wife and 4 kids instead of a 35 year old retired stockbroker living in the Hampton's in a house complete with a fully furnished dungeon; she got so depressed and discouraged that she decided to end her life by throwing herself into the ocean. But, just before she could throw herself from the docks, a handsome young sailor stopped her.
"You have so much to live for," said the sailor. "Look, I'm off to Europe tomorrow and I can stow you away on my ship. I'll take care of you, bring you food every day, and keep you happy."
With nothing to lose, combined with the fact that she had always wanted to go to Europe, the woman accepted. That night the sailor brought her aboard and hid her in a lifeboat. From then on, every night, he would bring her three sandwiches and make love to her until dawn.
Three weeks later, she was discovered by the captain during a routine inspection.
"What are you doing here?" asked the captain.
"I have an arrangement with one of your sailors," she replied."He brings me food and I get a free trip to Europe. Plus, he's screwing me."
"He certainly is," replied the captain. "This is the Staten Island Ferry."
Edited to add:(Okay - you can stop the emails. I DID re-write this one to make it "lifestyle" oriented. In it's original form it was a "beautiful blond" woman. But I feel you should always tailor your material to the audience.)
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