Muttling -> RE: Figuring out what it is I want (4/1/2011 1:35:16 PM)
Lots of good suggestions. If both of you are readers, I suggest a book or printing out a short story. Read it with a highlighter and pen. Highlight/underline the parts you really like. Strike through your dislikes then give it to him for ideas.
liveinposs4bislv -> RE: Figuring out what it is I want (4/6/2011 8:34:00 PM)
Strive to serve him better. Maybe it is OK not to know...? AS his dominance grows so he will give you direction. Don't get hung up on words like limits, live out different things, you'll know when you hit (or are hit) by a limit! Know then that you served your Dominant, by gaining information to assist more play.
windchymes -> RE: Figuring out what it is I want (4/6/2011 8:50:52 PM)
quote:
ORIGINAL: niquefreek
quote:
ORIGINAL: ThundersCry
Share your books with your husband...don`t keep it a secret...he may very well *feel* the same way...
Oh it isn't that he doesn't feel the same way, we talk all the time everything is very open. Its just frustrating because he is learning himself about being a dominant (in a sexual way) and so he is asking me what I want and I don't know so it gets hard. And we will be doing stuff, and after i will tell him I would have liked more of this or less of this and he gets frustrated because he wants to know during so he can adjust. But when we are in the middle of stuff it is a totally different headspace for me. If I have to stop and say "hey can you spank my ass a little harder; or you know that was really annoying stop that" it kind of blows the mood for me - if that makes sense?
I can understand that, but maybe in the early stages of learning you could sort of "take one for the team" and blow the mood once so you can have lots of great moods in the future? Kind of an investment in the future?