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I Was Watching My Cats Today... (Silly Post Just To War... - 11/30/2010 1:33:16 PM   
lovingpet


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...and I couldn't help but notice their behavior.  I've got an older cat and two little ones who are siblings.  The older one had long rule the roost uncontested (except for the whining of his human subjects LOL).  He terrorized several different kittens we had tried to bring in over the time he has been with us.  This time was different though.  After a rather drawn out stand off and getting to know you phase, he has become paternal and quite protective of the other two.  Needless to say, he's still the dominant one among them.

The older one had retreated some time earlier to the bedroom to get some much needed and wanted snooze time.  After an hour or so, one of the little natives had gotten restless.  He came into the room, jump up on the bed right in front of the sleeping cat.  The jostle to bed woke him and the little one turned over on his back and sighed.  The older one pulled him in closer and licked him (what this kitten usually seems to want when he is with the older one).  After a bit of licking, he laid still and let the little one snuggle in with occasional licks.  Eventually, he went about his own business, but stayed near the kitten even coming back to give a lick or nuzzle as the kitten contentedly slept.  Rarely, the kitten would get up and come after an additional nuzzle or lick too.  After awhile, they parted ways.  I believe the older one left the room and the little one stayed on the bed.

What struck me was the fluidity of the exchange and the lack of "dominant games" for lack of a better term.  The submissive one approached the dominant one and it wasn't responded to as a threat to the dominant's position and there was no fear in coming to him.  "I need" was not construed as some form of manipulation or "do me" attitude.  Meeting the need was not a sign of weakness or held as some kind of thing to be earned or free to be given or not on the whimsy of the dominant.  Also, meeting the need was not enough.  The dominant stayed to care for the submissive until they were settled completely.  There was "aftercare".  When his submissive's needs were met, he went on with his ruling of the household as he always did.  There was no switching (as in overthrow), topping from the bottom, or any other power struggle scenario.  There were two contented cats, neither any more or less a cat, and their little power structure was undisturbed even as I caught myself thinking how that little kitten had the older one wrapped around his little finger.  My opinion didn't matter.

I thought about the threads that we see here all the time.  I thought about all the questions I have had along the way as I have and continue to journey through my first and, hopefully, only M/s relationship.  I think about the conversations I have had with others.  I just thought how, wow, these cats have got it just right.  Why do the humans make it so darn complicated?  They were just being cats.  They lived in relation to each other as they had determined among themselves.  They didn't really choose it.  It's just how it all turned out ultimately.  They were all content and everyone got what they needed.  Nothing outside of them had influence or input into how they conducted themselves.  It was natural.  It flowed.  And now I have decided I want to be more like my cats!      

lovingpet
da silly


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If you put your head into more, you'd have to put your back into less. ~Me

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RE: I Was Watching My Cats Today... (Silly Post Just To... - 11/30/2010 4:20:51 PM   
MaamJay


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Loved the story! They say "Everything I know I've learned from my dog" ... but I reckon you can learn from cats too! Mainly about how to be a natural Dominant LOL!

Maam Jay aka violet[A]

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RE: I Was Watching My Cats Today... (Silly Post Just To... - 11/30/2010 5:43:17 PM   
lovingpet


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Thank you for getting what I was going for.  I sounded sooooo serious.  

Better sign off for a bit.  I hear the kitty domly one calling!  LOL

lovingpet


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If you put your head into more, you'd have to put your back into less. ~Me

10 Fluffy pts.


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RE: I Was Watching My Cats Today... (Silly Post Just To... - 11/30/2010 5:48:00 PM   
leadership527


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A wonderful story Lovingpet..... and I totally agree. At least in my house, the dialog between my dominant self and her submissive one happens fluidly, easily, and without anyone particularly trying to do anything or worrying about anything. Carol and I are both wrapped around each other's fingers.... just the way we like it.

But then again, this is why I say that the thing called D/s in the BDSM context is not D/s in the larger social context (which, in this case, includes the animal kingdom). I think that when the people who decided to start using D/s rather than T/b did that, it was motivated by political reasons, not scientific understanding of the terms. So in that vein, it's not so much that humans are complicating it. It's that what is being called D/s in the BDSM context is not the same as the D/s you just witnessed and the rules for it are VASTLY more complicated. Us humans still do the same old uncomplicated D/s thing that you saw with your cats. But that's not the same as BDSM D/s.

_____________________________

~Jeff

I didn't so much "enslave" Carol as I did "enlove" her. - Me
I want a joyous, loving, respectful relationship where the male is in charge and deserves to be. - DavanKael

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RE: I Was Watching My Cats Today... (Silly Post Just To... - 11/30/2010 6:19:04 PM   
soul2share


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With my bunch, the only one that is actually dommed is ME!  KB adopted the two younger boys after losing his dog.  He plays mama every night, he grooms them and bathes them and when the boys want some cuddling, they just climb on up to where he's at.  Sometimes, just sleeping together seems to make them happy.

Yeah, life is so simple.....why humans can't just be more like them just amazes me.  We tend to complicate things, and often don't even know why!

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RE: I Was Watching My Cats Today... (Silly Post Just To... - 11/30/2010 6:21:24 PM   
SorceressJ


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Attachment (1)

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RE: I Was Watching My Cats Today... (Silly Post Just To... - 11/30/2010 6:54:36 PM   
lovingpet


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But Leadership, I like the kitty D/s thing.  *pouts*

I have been temporarily released from my gang's service.  They have been fed, watered, cleaned up after, and adored, so they're done with me.  I didn't know kitties even GAVE safewords SJ.  I feel unsafe now.  Like prey.  Look at the way they're staring at me.  I'm doomed. 

lovingpet


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If you put your head into more, you'd have to put your back into less. ~Me

10 Fluffy pts.


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RE: I Was Watching My Cats Today... (Silly Post Just To... - 11/30/2010 7:23:11 PM   
catize


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quote:

I didn't know kitties even GAVE safewords SJ. I feel unsafe now. Like prey.


She who knows how to work the can opener is ALWAYS in control, Lovingpet, have no fear!

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"Power is real. But it's a lot less real if it's not perceived as power."
Robert Parker, Stranger in Paradise

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RE: I Was Watching My Cats Today... (Silly Post Just To... - 11/30/2010 7:29:06 PM   
lovingpet


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We feed dry.  

_____________________________

If you put your head into more, you'd have to put your back into less. ~Me

10 Fluffy pts.


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RE: I Was Watching My Cats Today... (Silly Post Just To... - 11/30/2010 9:25:30 PM   
leadership527


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quote:

ORIGINAL: lovingpet
I feel unsafe now.  Like prey.
*palms face* they're felines. Of COURSE you're prey. EVERYTHING is prey. You're only hope is to not twitch and to make sure you have no dangly ends that need to be pounced. For kittens, I also highly recommend not moving any body parts under a comforter. Man, those little guys have NEEDLE sharp claws that go through a few layers of blankets with no trouble at all.


_____________________________

~Jeff

I didn't so much "enslave" Carol as I did "enlove" her. - Me
I want a joyous, loving, respectful relationship where the male is in charge and deserves to be. - DavanKael

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RE: I Was Watching My Cats Today... (Silly Post Just To... - 11/30/2010 9:32:36 PM   
lovingpet


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Oh yay!  Needleplay.  I feel soooo much better now.  

_____________________________

If you put your head into more, you'd have to put your back into less. ~Me

10 Fluffy pts.


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RE: I Was Watching My Cats Today... (Silly Post Just To... - 12/1/2010 5:07:23 AM   
lally2


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i love to watch the pecking order thing going on with animals.  it is so natural and we are animals too after all.

for me it underpins the feeling ive always had that the natural order of Dominance and submission has FA to do with sexuality.  my horse doesnt get turned on by being the dominant horse in the paddock and keeping that position.  through body language he can facilitate a bit of mutual grooming with one of the others or he can establish his dominance.  no hard on in evidence.

we make it complicated because we confuse it with sexuality.  for us we are wired to be more sexually responsive to someone who is dominant or submissive.

but if youre big pussy cat had turned the kitten over, rolled it off the bed with a swipe and a hiss the kitten might well have tried to retaliate.  and again thats where we're different.  retaliation in Ms isnt acceptable. 

if a stallion wants to mount a mare who isnt in season enough he's quite likely to be vehemently rebuffed.  in Ms we wouldnt dare!

much of what we are here is part natural and part suppressed, part physical, part psychological.  we're just not that straight forward.  plus pussy cats and horses have never been told that equality and egalitrian relationships are the norm and that biffing up the more subservient members isnt nice.  lol,   they dont give a shit about that - which makes theyre honesty with each other and how they control theyre environment and relationships so refreshing.



_____________________________

So all I have to do in order to serve him, is to work out exactly how improbable he is, feed that figure into the finite improbability generator, give him a fresh cup of really hot tea ... and turn him on!

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RE: I Was Watching My Cats Today... (Silly Post Just To... - 12/1/2010 5:26:30 AM   
Kana


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Lets see, of my three cats, two are switches and one, the wanna be alpha, is a little bitch with little backbone and a strong tendency towards passive-aggressiveness

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HST

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RE: I Was Watching My Cats Today... (Silly Post Just To... - 12/1/2010 12:38:42 PM   
soul2share


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quote:

ORIGINAL: catize
quote:

I didn't know kitties even GAVE safewords SJ. I feel unsafe now. Like prey.

She who knows how to work the can opener is ALWAYS in control, Lovingpet, have no fear!


I'm in serious trouble then.....they haven't gotten the opposable thumbs yet, but Squeaks can rip thru the cat food bags and the treats packets.....*gulp*!

And KB would beg to differ the whole control thing.....yes, I operate the can opener, but he's the one who head butts me awake when he's hungry.  Or bored, or cold...he waits til I get up and sneaks into the warm spot left behind!  Or if he just wants to say "IIIIII'm heeeeeeeere Mama!  In this household, he rules the roost!

But I too was watching the two siblings yesterday....they had a couple of wild hairs up their butts and were jumping on each other all day.  I never noticed it before, but when they play, Boo takes the dominant stance, and Smooch is the one lower to the ground.  Not that Smooch won't fight back, but it is the way they always seem to end up when they reach the "evil stare" stage of the game.  Otherwise, when they aren't beating each other up, they are equals.

< Message edited by soul2share -- 12/1/2010 12:43:55 PM >


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I have to stop saying "How stupid can you be?"...people are starting to take it as a challenge!

*Not a fuck was given.*

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RE: I Was Watching My Cats Today... (Silly Post Just To... - 12/2/2010 10:19:15 AM   
lovingpet


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I still have fairly firm reigns on my kitty patrol, but alas I am losing ground fast.  It is HILARIOUS to watch them completely overpower someone ELSE who lives here.  I really should behave, but I just can't help myself.  Anyway...I'm glad to know that there is truly no hope.  At least I'm in good company.  LOL

lally2:  It is that brutal honesty of the whole exchange that I loved so much.  My guess is even a frustrated or irritated response from the kitten, would have been further rebuffed successfully by the grumplepuss.  Until he's too old and weak to hold his ground, it's his.  Losing his marbles doesn't count, however.  He may one day be some crazy dictator handing down edicts for the kittens to now return to him the full share of all hairballs in the kingdom for his pleasure and it won't matter.  The kittens will do it.  I wonder how SSC factors into this little kitty world.  I just love how the whole structure arises.  It isn't because the other two crowned him master of the domain.  It isn't because they have a say and ways of ensuring their well being.  It isn't based on the character of the lead cat.  It is for the same reason a whale's throat is the size it is...because that's the way it is.  No apologies, no reservations, and no contentions.  I'm not saying it's exactly purrrrrrfect for the human counterparts, but it sure is fun to look at. 

lovingpet


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If you put your head into more, you'd have to put your back into less. ~Me

10 Fluffy pts.


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RE: I Was Watching My Cats Today... (Silly Post Just To... - 12/3/2010 12:41:38 AM   
MaamJay


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This was a GREAT thread and that picture was priceless! Thanks!

From the Domme whose kittens are now reminding Her that it's dinnertime NOW!

Maam Jay aka violet[A]

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Life is a song ... and I love singing it! (By me!)

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