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Non SM people? - 10/13/2010 12:50:51 AM   
Saltypepper128


Posts: 24
Joined: 9/21/2008
Status: offline 		Is anyone on here not into the SM part of bondage?  I've been browsing this site for a few years off and on and it feels like I'm the only one who's into bondage just for all the tied up girls and not the regular beatings that are given out/received (no offense to the people who are into that.  If thats your thing and you're companion enjoys it that's cool with me).  I can't be the only one who just enjoys tying/being tied up.  I feel so left out
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RE: Non SM people? - 10/13/2010 1:48:39 AM   
WolfyMontgomery


Posts: 234
Joined: 9/28/2010
Status: offline 		I prefer it too, Salty =)

While I do enjoy SM play *sometimes* I know that I am no where NEAR as masochistic as a lot of the people that I have met and known in my forays into the kinky world. I actually like the bruising that comes from the beatings more than the beatings themselves, and rope-burn does the same thing.

I love love love being tied up, restrained, blindfolded, almost anything and everything to do with restraints and ropes and cuffs and whatnot. I wish we could do it more often, but there's no rope that is able to be played with in our home and Master hasn't had the time to properly learn all the knots and safety precautions and whatnot to do with it, so he doesn't like doing that sort of thing by himself - we've only ever done anything beyond tying my hands and feet up at public play parties.

I actually like sensation and sensory deprivation play more than pain play - get a feather or a piece of ice or rabbit fur or leather (soft or hard) or a cold butter knife (it feels sharp but not painful, it's more like fear/shock play to me) and tease me with them any day, blindfold me and have me guess what it is. Crops are damn sexy, I love them, but they don't make me moan like a sensual touch does.


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(in reply to Saltypepper128)
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RE: Non SM people? - 10/13/2010 1:58:11 AM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline 		In addition to the responses you get here, you might be interested in this thread from last week.  Same subject, different angle.  http://www.collarchat.com/m_3428303/tm.htm

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RE: Non SM people? - 10/13/2010 7:34:36 AM   
bliss4us09


Posts: 106
Joined: 3/31/2009
Status: offline 		Keep in mind that there are reasons for inflicting pain that go beyond the fact that either the giver or the receiver enjoy it. In discipline, it's used as a corrective; in a meditative approach, to clear the mind. The pain itself needn't be the object of the exercise.

(in reply to Saltypepper128)
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RE: Non SM people? - 10/13/2010 12:07:54 PM   
EclipseAbove


Posts: 220
Joined: 8/11/2005
Status: offline 		There are plenty of people who only prefer one particular aspect and dislike the others (SM, D/s, or BD). However, I think it is safe to say that the majority of people enjoy mutliple aspects to varying degrees and the "purists" (if I can call them that) are far less common. There is no reason to feel left out - the majority of BDSMers like bondage, just like you. They just also happen to like some other things as well. Enbrace the commonalities and not the differences.

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RE: Non SM people? - 10/13/2010 2:22:27 PM   
tiggerspoohbear


Posts: 19141
Joined: 6/27/2010
Status: offline 		Different strokes for different folks.  I'm not a masochist and Tigger isn't a sadist, so it's a perfect fit for us.  I do know, however, there's a fine line between pain and pleasure and that line can be and is wonderful. 

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RE: Non SM people? - 10/13/2010 3:08:03 PM   
Saltypepper128


Posts: 24
Joined: 9/21/2008
Status: offline 		Hmm maybe I titled this wrong. What I meant to say was are there any people who aren't really into the whole master slave thing? I just like the experience of binding/gagging/doing inappropriate things to females lol. I don't really like to consider myself a master of anyone, just someone who enjoys the "sexual positions" that are popular in bdsm, if you will. Does that make sense?

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RE: Non SM people? - 10/13/2010 3:29:52 PM   
tiggerspoohbear


Posts: 19141
Joined: 6/27/2010
Status: offline 		There's people of every ilk out there.  Tops, Doms, Masters, Dommes, Mistresses, bottoms, submissives, slaves and switches.  If you're looking for a play partner, then you don't want someone who wants a ltr.  If you're looking for a ltr then you aren't going to look for someone who just wants to play.  Makes sense to me. 

_____________________________

"RABBIT IS GOOD, RABBIT IS WISE".

"I'm a baaa-aaad pussycat".


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RE: Non SM people? - 10/13/2010 3:31:54 PM   
DomImus


Posts: 2004
Joined: 3/17/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Saltypepper128
Hmm maybe I titled this wrong. What I meant to say was are there any people who aren't really into the whole master slave thing? I just like the experience of binding/gagging/doing inappropriate things to females lol. I don't really like to consider myself a master of anyone, just someone who enjoys the "sexual positions" that are popular in bdsm, if you will. Does that make sense?


Now that you put it that way I will answer. I'm with you. I love all of the physical aspects of bdsm. For years it used to be only about bondage and my toybag was a very small and rudimentary collection of generic pervertables - neckties, scarves, rope and tape. About 15 years ago I started investing in more proper toys. Somewhere along the way I developed a palate for sadism and then came more toys appropriate for that. These days I can barely fit all of my stuff into my new downsized vehicle. A long way from my 'kinky foreplay' days.

I love all of the props of bdsm but have little use for all of the pomp and circumstance associated with the D/s protocol. Playing with me amounts to showing up and consenting to allow me to tie you up and do nasty things to you.

(in reply to Saltypepper128)
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RE: Non SM people? - 10/13/2010 3:40:22 PM   
sweetsub1957


Posts: 2201
Joined: 4/28/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Saltypepper128
Is anyone on here not into the SM part of bondage?

quote:

ORIGINAL: Saltypepper128
What I meant to say was are there any people who aren't really into the whole master slave thing?

Yes. I'm not into a lot of pain, just spanking and some not-so-heavy flogging because it's more thumpy and less stingy. Daddy is a bit of a sadist, so I will try to increase my tolerance, even though "I" am not "into it." I do like the bondage, discipline, Domination/submission aspects of it though.

I'm also not into the Master/slave thing. That's too extreme for me. I'm my Daddy's submissive lil girl. We like that much better.

~sweetsub~

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In lowering yourself to talking behind my back, you're perfectly positioned to kiss my ass.

An it harm none, do what ye wilt.

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RE: Non SM people? - 10/13/2010 3:41:05 PM   
StrongSpirit


Posts: 575
Joined: 4/10/2005
Status: offline 		I am a dominant, not a sadist. About the most pain I enjoy giving is a spanking. But I love to chain people up, gag them, and in general have my will obeyed.

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RE: Non SM people? - 10/13/2010 4:28:03 PM   
Saltypepper128


Posts: 24
Joined: 9/21/2008
Status: offline 		Ok cool so I'm not alone. Now if I could just find a victim that is willing to be tied up by me personally....

(in reply to StrongSpirit)
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RE: Non SM people? - 10/13/2010 4:40:08 PM   
jujubeeMB


Posts: 723
Joined: 1/8/2010
Status: offline 		Not into S&M at all. My Dom is in the process of lightly increasing my pain threshold (as in, increasing it from zero to slightly more than zero), and I enjoy giving him something that's a bit hard for me, but it's not really a turn on for me. The psychology of it gets me much more than the actual physical pain.

Btw, OP, you're not remotely alone. A lot of people aren't into the S&M side of things.

(in reply to StrongSpirit)
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RE: Non SM people? - 10/13/2010 4:49:36 PM   
littlewonder


Posts: 15659
Status: offline 		I love being bound just for the sake of being bound. I find it safe and secure and just all around comforting. While Master is a sadist there are times he will indulge me with bondage without pain because he knows there are times I just need that to de-stress sometimes.


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RE: Non SM people? - 10/13/2010 4:59:06 PM   
Saltypepper128


Posts: 24
Joined: 9/21/2008
Status: offline 		See its strange because it seems like there a good amount of you who just enjoy being bound but when I browse the personals it seems like people who just enjoy being restrained for pleasure are nonexistent

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RE: Non SM people? - 10/13/2010 5:00:39 PM   
Saltypepper128


Posts: 24
Joined: 9/21/2008
Status: offline 		Well it sounds like he's a very lucky guy.

(in reply to jujubeeMB)
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RE: Non SM people? - 10/13/2010 6:08:34 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		I find there are two kinds of people, those who do restraints to get to the good parts and those who think restraints are the good part.

But from a talking point of view, there's simply more to talk about with the myriad of options in s & m. Saying he tied me up last night and I had a blast doesn't really spark a lot of conversation.


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RE: Non SM people? - 10/13/2010 7:29:47 PM   
Aynne88


Posts: 3873
Joined: 8/29/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sweetsub1957


quote:

ORIGINAL: Saltypepper128
Is anyone on here not into the SM part of bondage?

quote:

ORIGINAL: Saltypepper128
What I meant to say was are there any people who aren't really into the whole master slave thing?

Yes. I'm not into a lot of pain, just spanking and some not-so-heavy flogging because it's more thumpy and less stingy. Daddy is a bit of a sadist, so I will try to increase my tolerance, even though "I" am not "into it." I do like the bondage, discipline, Domination/submission aspects of it though.

I'm also not into the Master/slave thing. That's too extreme for me. I'm my Daddy's submissive lil girl. We like that much better.

~sweetsub~



How can you answer that when you haven't even met in person yet? When you finally meet in person you might enjoy more pain than you think you do. Edited to add I didn't mean to sound bitchy but really how do you know?

< Message edited by Aynne88 -- 10/13/2010 7:54:30 PM >

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RE: Non SM people? - 10/13/2010 8:01:02 PM   
Saltypepper128


Posts: 24
Joined: 9/21/2008
Status: offline 		I wasn't really trying to answer anything, I was asking. But I dunno its not really on my to do list of things that I want to try with a partner. Don't get me wrong, I'm always game for trying new things but I'm not going to be encouraging someone to be my slave either. If you weren't asking me I apologize and you can disregard this comment.

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RE: Non SM people? - 10/14/2010 6:36:59 AM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: tiggerspoohbear

There's people of every ilk out there.  Tops, Doms, Masters, Dommes, Mistresses, bottoms, submissives, slaves and switches.  If you're looking for a play partner, then you don't want someone who wants a ltr.  If you're looking for a ltr then you aren't going to look for someone who just wants to play.  Makes sense to me. 


He didn't say he wants a NSA. Just that he isn't into power relationships. That he seeks a partner who is also into bondage. And there are people like that. Mutually enjoyable activities both inside and outside of the bedroom.

But yes, us bondage only types are the minority. The best thing he can do is just date and when he feels that connection, then before you have sex, tell her that this is a turn on for you and would she be interested in trying it. Because even very whitebread type people have been known to tie their partners wrists to the bedpost with some scarves. Scarves will not frighten a newbie, but 300' of rope might.

Beyond that, go to your local munches and meet people.


_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


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