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inkSecret -> RE: Is sadomasochism hereditary? (9/3/2010 10:29:31 PM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: gungadin09
i'm referring to PERSONALITY here, because i think that sadism and masochism can be personality traits and not just kinks. For myself, i see a thread that links my masochistic personality to my mom's, and her's to her mother's. My dad has strong submissive AND dominant qualities. My paternal grandfather was very dominant towards his family, and my paternal grandmother is a strong emotional masochist. i can see a connection between their personalities and my own. i don't know if it's nature or nurture, but i believe that their influences made me who i am.
i'm not complaining. i kind of like my quirky, fucked up life, after all. i wouldn't choose to be someone else. But i was wondering, is anyone else in the same situation? My ex-Master had two VERY dominant parents. My guess is that it's a common situation.
How many people feel that their orientation was influenced by their parents' personalities?
pam
P.S.- By the way, i stole this thread from Fetlife. Yes, i'm a thief.
...My Father was an unchanging, unmoving man. He wasn't dominant though, nor submissive. More like a Lone Wolf of Finance. He was Strong and Powerful in his time. But when it came to dominating my Mother... Well... That just wouldn't happen.
...My Mother was a deluded, insecure control freak. She needed both attention and control constantly. And she was never satisfied with it because she never felt like people were doing things of their own free will. Never realizing she was causing her own problem.
I didn't like any of them. For the most part, I thought they were useless.
But I can see they influenced my Brand of Dominance. I hated that my Father was unable to admit he was wrong.
But at the same time I was also Unchanging and Unmoving
What I learned was that Intentions and Ideas do not have to Change or Move.
But Intentions and Ideas were not reality which should be Accepted when presented.
I hated that my Mother was insecure and often had everyone underneath her thumb, but I also found myself doing it to my friends
I realized though that my friends didn't mind that I was so controlling, because I was also leading them to the things they wanted.
And that I would relinquish control in areas that were outside of my jurisdiction
Realizing without the group or partner's free will that the control was useless
I think that our parents do craft us, but we still choose what to do with what they craft.
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They did a study on twins. A girl and a boy.
Single mother parent, who was a drinking worthless abusive mother
The boy becomes a respectable doctor, whose rich and good
The girl becomes a drinking worthless abuser
They asked the boy "Why'd you turn out this way" and he replies "Look at my mother, how could I have turned out any other way?"
They asked the girl "Why'd you turn out this way" and she replies "Look at my mother, how could I have turned out any other way?"
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I think our parents only give us the building blocks, but we decide our personalities based on our ideals and our own core understanding.
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>_>, it also depends on if you have a huge fucking penis. xD
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