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Is BDSM Addictive? - 7/17/2010 5:29:56 PM

Glasgow

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I heard today that one of the reasons BDSM is a big no-no is that it is highly addictive and very hard to get out of.

I jfgi, but I didn't see very many conclusive answers. The only thing that came close was the suggestion that we get addicted to the hormones released during play.

And we don't need to argue about whether BDSM is right or wrong. Just the addictive part. So, you know... any comments?

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RE: Is BDSM Addictive? - 7/17/2010 5:36:11 PM

juliaoceania

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Where did you read this, for one?

One can be addicted to many things, even the internet, or gaming. It is a behavioral process built up on what the brain perceives as a reward... I mean, there are some that think sex is addictive (although this is debated)

I would say that BDSM is no more or less addictive than anything else that feels good

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RE: Is BDSM Addictive? - 7/17/2010 5:39:01 PM

Glasgow

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quote:

ORIGINAL: juliaoceania

Where did you read this, for one?

One can be addicted to many things, even the internet, or gaming. It is a behavioral process built up on what the brain perceives as a reward... I mean, there are some that think sex is addictive (although this is debated)

I would say that BDSM is no more or less addictive than anything else that feels good

I've been warned that I come off as a victim, so I feel it might be in the best interests of focus not to say where I heard it. I do trust the source has done their time researching, though.

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RE: Is BDSM Addictive? - 7/17/2010 5:45:41 PM

alatheia

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Glasgow

I heard today that one of the reasons BDSM is a big no-no is that it is highly addictive and very hard to get out of.

I do not know if id consider it any more addicting than gaming, the internet (as juliaoceania mentioned) or chocolate yet I dont think its that its hard to get out of.. Its more of a "we just dont want to". Seriously, would you go back to a non bdsm life or could you?

Edit to add: im curious as to where you heard/read this as well.

< Message edited by alatheia -- 7/17/2010 5:46:25 PM >

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RE: Is BDSM Addictive? - 7/17/2010 5:47:28 PM

Elisabella

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I read an article about the dangers of this new drug called "idosing" - it's listening to mood altering music. Seriously, that's it. New scary drug.

I think that people, in general, have an unreasonable fear of addiction.

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RE: Is BDSM Addictive? - 7/17/2010 5:49:21 PM

Glasgow

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quote:

ORIGINAL: alatheia

quote:

ORIGINAL: Glasgow

I heard today that one of the reasons BDSM is a big no-no is that it is highly addictive and very hard to get out of.

I do not know if id consider it any more addicting than gaming, the internet (as juliaoceania mentioned) or chocolate yet I dont think its that its hard to get out of.. Its more of a "we just dont want to". Seriously, would you go back to a non bdsm life or could you?

Edit to add: im curious as to where you heard/read this as well.

But what about an abusive type situation where (I'm assuming the sub) is being physically/mentally harmed and wants to leave the lifestyle, but can't? And not just that specific partner, but is drawn back to meeting new Doms?

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RE: Is BDSM Addictive? - 7/17/2010 5:54:17 PM

Elisabella

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Glasgow
But what about an abusive type situation where (I'm assuming the sub) is being physically/mentally harmed and wants to leave the lifestyle, but can't? And not just that specific partner, but is drawn back to meeting new Doms?

Sans BDSM you've got just about every soap opera waitress in history.

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RE: Is BDSM Addictive? - 7/17/2010 5:58:42 PM

juliaoceania

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quote:

But what about an abusive type situation where (I'm assuming the sub) is being physically/mentally harmed and wants to leave the lifestyle, but can't? And not just that specific partner, but is drawn back to meeting new Doms?

What about vanilla women that hook up in unhealthy relationships... are they "addicted" too?

I remember when I was first exploring BDSM I read an article on a Castle Realm sorta site about the dangers of novice submissives hooking up with dangerous doms and acting out in dangerous ways to get a subspace fix

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RE: Is BDSM Addictive? - 7/17/2010 5:59:03 PM

angelikaJ

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In my case, this is about the relationship with my partner and not "the fix" from play.

There is a lot of "mundane" day-to-day living in my life, it is about pleasing him, serving him but it is not about the play.

Play is perhaps once a week, sometimes more...occasionally none. In your scenario, I would be in a constant state of withdrawal and unable to function.

So, no... by your definition, I am not addicted.

The problem with your sources addiction model is that illicit drugs actually change the chemistry of the brain... and the change is permanent.

In the case of play, while we may want the feeling of subspace our brain is not permanently phucked and we won't have withdrawal if we don't get it.

I think some people become psychologically dependent on play or their partner but that is a different matter altogether.

edit: spelling

< Message edited by angelikaJ -- 7/17/2010 6:21:37 PM >

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RE: Is BDSM Addictive? - 7/17/2010 5:59:57 PM

AQuietSimpleMan

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Glasgow
I've been warned that I come off as a victim, so I feel it might be in the best interests of focus not to say where I heard it. I do trust the source has done their time researching, though.

Your Source is Misleading. Dopamine and Serotonin which are released during an S&M session, are indeed naturally produced and create what is known as Temporal Euphoria.

The point is that it is an addicton if you are damaging your life in order to obtain it. So for you it May very well be an addiction, as you have seriously turned your life upside down just to be a part of it. You have also caused your family and those who love you distressed for your own desire to receive what you get out of the BDSM Lifestyle.

But Then again I know people who see going to the Gym as a religious aspect of their lives and seperate themselves from their family in the persuit of some visiual goal.

Sports can be an equal addiction. As can Food, and Love for that matter.

The point is that some people can address their desires and still maintain a balance in their lives. Some people cannot and those people should look to something different because no matter what they will find unhappiness eventually and obsession in the life they choose.

Take it from a Recovering Addict..... If your life is unmanageable because of something you are doing, it is most likely not good for you.

QSM

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RE: Is BDSM Addictive? - 7/17/2010 6:02:01 PM

Aileen1968

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Glasgow

I heard today that one of the reasons BDSM is a big no-no is that it is highly addictive and very hard to get out of.

I jfgi, but I didn't see very many conclusive answers. The only thing that came close was the suggestion that we get addicted to the hormones released during play.

And we don't need to argue about whether BDSM is right or wrong. Just the addictive part. So, you know... any comments?

I wouldn't go so far as saying it's addicting, but it is fun as hell.
After experiencing so many different things that two sick fucks can do to each other (the possibilities are truly endless), I can't see myself ever having a vanilla relationship again. And not in just the physical aspects, but the mental ones too....for us, the control dynamic is just as important as the physical things we do.

edited to add...if I'm addicted to anything, I'm addicted to him, not bdsm. It's the idea of him doing things to me.

< Message edited by Aileen1968 -- 7/17/2010 6:03:38 PM >

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RE: Is BDSM Addictive? - 7/17/2010 6:06:07 PM

DarkSteven

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That may not be a bad thing.

Saying it's addictive is putting a negative spin on the fact that you will want to do it again.

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The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

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RE: Is BDSM Addictive? - 7/17/2010 6:10:06 PM

Glasgow

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quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

That may not be a bad thing.

Saying it's addictive is putting a negative spin on the fact that you will want to do it again.

Wanting to do it again has nothing to do with addiction. Addiction is a physical or mental dependency on something even if it is ruining your health and life.

_____________________________

I wash my hands of this weirdness.

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RE: Is BDSM Addictive? - 7/17/2010 6:11:27 PM

sweetsub1957

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~FR~
i think just about anything can be potentially addicting. That still doesn't mean any particular person will get addicted to it........

~sweetsub~

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RE: Is BDSM Addictive? - 7/17/2010 6:19:39 PM

blueicing

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In my Anatomy & physiology class we learned about the brain this week. My professor talked about endorphins. When the body perceives pain, we release endorphins. Some people get addicted to that feeling - such as a runner who is used to running 10 miles a day, and suddenly stops. When they stop running, the body doesn't produce the endorphins, and they may feel withdrawal symptoms just as if they had been taking pain medication every day and then suddenly stop.
Maybe that's what the article you're talking about is referring to. Maybe not BDSM in it's entirety, but the specific endorphins released during anything the body perceives as pain.

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RE: Is BDSM Addictive? - 7/17/2010 6:20:48 PM

xssve

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Lots' of things are addictive, including boredom.

Few things uglier than a boredom addiction.

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RE: Is BDSM Addictive? - 7/17/2010 6:25:32 PM

georgeinca

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I know it's possible to be a sex addict/lust addict. I suppose BDSM addiction could be one "flavour" of it, the same way that different gambling addicts could be addicted to poker or slots or sports betting.

Just "really liking BDSM and not wanting to go vanilla again" wouldn't be addiction. Addiction would be more like, I don't know, making bad decisions because you're hooked, or feeling like you're going to die if you don't get it.

I wouldn't be surprised if some in the community feel like that. They say 15% of people are susceptible to addiction -- they'll get hooked on something addictive if they try it -- whereas the other 85% could become habituated to something but not necessarily get truly addicted. So, short answer, yes, probably, but certainly not for everyone.

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RE: Is BDSM Addictive? - 7/17/2010 6:28:52 PM

DarkSteven

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Glasgow

Addiction is a physical or mental dependency on something even if it is ruining your health and life.

It's not required to be destructive. I have heard the term "psychologically addictive" used to define things that you just plain want to do again.

Back to your original question - a bottom can get addicted to the endorphin rush, and I have heard of subs that were in serious pain (e.g., fibromyalgia) and used scening to cover the pain with endorphins. It doesn't have to be a bad thing.

_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

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RE: Is BDSM Addictive? - 7/17/2010 6:29:38 PM

angelikaJ

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quote:

ORIGINAL: AQuietSimpleMan

Your Source is Misleading. Dopamine and Serotonin which are released during an S&M session, are indeed naturally produced and create what is known as Temporal Euphoria.

The point is that it is an addicton if you are damaging your life in order to obtain it. So for you it May very well be an addiction, as you have seriously turned your life upside down just to be a part of it. You have also caused your family and those who love you distressed for your own desire to receive what you get out of the BDSM Lifestyle.

Take it from a Recovering Addict..... If your life is unmanageable because of something you are doing, it is most likely not good for you.

QSM

What QSM wrote is very true and what I wrote minimised that aspect.

I am glad he clarified that point.

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RE: Is BDSM Addictive? - 7/17/2010 6:32:27 PM

jujubeeMB

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I don't know anything about the science of this, so it's purely opinion-based, but I actually get a little frustrated with how often the word "addiction" is thrown around to various obsessions. Yes, a lot of people have addictive, obsessive personalities, but there's just such a huge difference between being addicted to cigarettes or alcohol and being addicted to Myst (sorry, I just got the app on my iPhone, which I'm also "addicted" to). The difference is whether you go through serious physical withdrawal or not, and wishing you could be at home watching True Blood rather than at a boring office party is not serious physical withdrawal.

All that said, I don't have enough information to know if BDSM constitutes a serious physical or psychological addiction. I do know that sex addiction is viewed with a pretty skeptical eye, and BDSM addiction would fall under the same sort of category. If BDSM doesn't constitute a serious physical or psychological addiction - by medical standards - then I'm going to categorize it with being addicted to the internet. Ok, you freakin love it and wouldn't want to live without it, but you could if you were forced

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Post #: 20

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