How can i tell if i'm bisexual?

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How can i tell if i'm bisexual? - 7/9/2010 11:47:29 PM

gungadin09

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i think sex with a woman would be awkward. But i like looking at women's bodies. Come to think of it, i think sex with men is awkward, too. i think all sex is awkward, and kind of gross. i've had crushes on women before. But i've never wanted to sleep with one. Does that make me bisexual, or not? Sorry if this post is lame. It's Friday night, and i'm bored as hell.

pam

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RE: How can i tell if i'm bisexual? - 7/9/2010 11:56:41 PM

AQuietSimpleMan

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No it is a good question.

I am not one who thinks that having a Physical or a Sexual based attraction on someone makes you Bi-Sexual IN fact I have an interesting view on Bi-Sexuality.

I like the terms Hetroflexible and Homoflexible for when one has an attraction to to someone of the same or opposite gender but in primarily geared to one specific Gender and if given a choice would usually go that direction.

My girl is what I call Bi-Sexual, she is equally attracted to Men and Women, and if given a choice between one or the other would not tend toward one gender or the other.

Having an attraction really doesn't mean much at all. I am Attracted to men, I find them attractive and at times I wish I looked more like some of them and less like myself. It never gets sexual, so I never question my sexuality. I know when offered a choice between an attractive man and an unattractive female I will STILL chose the female.

I posted a Pic of me in an Red Mesh Top in the Boob thread. I thought it was funny, VAA mentioned that I muct be really secure. I agree I must be, cause someone questioning my sexuality never leads ME to question it.

So if you want to TRY it..... TRY IT. You will only really know if you actually experience it. Then you know for sure.

I did.

I'm a Hertosexual Male. It is just what I am.

QSM

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(in reply to gungadin09)

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RE: How can i tell if i'm bisexual? - 7/10/2010 12:19:38 AM

myotherself

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I agree with QSM - it's a sensible question!

I find women's bodies beautiful and often sexually exciting. I love snuggling in bewbies and would happily snog a woman

But would I have sex with a woman? The idea actually squicks me. Which doesn't really make a lot of sense, since I'm happy to snuggle and snog

Does that make me bisexual? Dunno - probably not. Given the choice, I'd choose the cock every time!

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RE: How can i tell if i'm bisexual? - 7/10/2010 12:39:14 AM

tjeannette

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Joined: 6/27/2010
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Not a silly question. I'm in a pretty similar situation, except I prefer women. I've never tried anything serious with a man, but I do find certain men attractive, even sexually. But I'm not quite sure I like the idea of sex with a man, and admit that the whole penis thing kinda squicks me out if I think about it..
Although, I admit, the males I find attractive are usually bisexual or gay- something about the almost feminine aspects, I guess. Very masculine gay men do nothing for me, only the more... flexible ones.

As for how you know, well, I'd say find a nice lady and try it out. That's what I intend to do, once I get together the nerve. You never know, could be fun

tj

(in reply to gungadin09)

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RE: How can i tell if i'm bisexual? - 7/10/2010 4:59:13 AM

Aneirin

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From: Tamaris
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Only way to tell, is give it a go, find an understanding person and have a try, but as a friend once said no matter whether you like or dislike, give it a go a second time as the first time is fraught with too many expectations and is not a true judge of experience.

I see bisexuality as spreading the love around and because I see sex as spiritual, it makes sense for the spirit to connect where it feels the need, as my belief is those to whom we are attracted for reasons we cannot understand is nothing but the spirit desiring a connection and quite possibly a connection that we need as there is something that person or we may need from each other.

I suppose it all comes down to the question of why are there two sexes, was it the intention that our difference was for furtherment of the species only, or was it we were given this apparent attraction because there is simply more to life than ensuring our species goes on. I think the latter, there is more to life and in a life where there is not a deficit of younglings, why limit ourselves for there is much learning to be had through experimentation and new experiences.

Life is love, spread it around, receive it where it is and give it where it is wanted.

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Everything we are is the result of what we have thought, the mind is everything, what we think, we become - Guatama Buddha

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RE: How can i tell if i'm bisexual? - 7/10/2010 5:00:30 AM

calamitysandra

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The first part, up to about a minute of this .

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RE: How can i tell if i'm bisexual? - 7/10/2010 7:27:54 AM

DarlingSavage

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Well, I don't think it's a silly question, either. I think women are hot. I like to look at women's bodies also. I don't mind having sex with another woman either. However, I want to be in a relationship with a man. I've tossed the idea around of being involved with a woman a few times, but, I want to be with a man. Period. It's just me.

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RE: How can i tell if i'm bisexual? - 7/10/2010 7:39:02 AM

VaguelyCurious

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From: United Kingdom
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FR

The term bisexual is a bit of a crappy one-it implies a discrete category that isn't really there. Sexuality is a spectrum. You'll be somewhere on that spectrum. The only important question is 'am I far enough along to spectrum to want to fuck a woman?'

If the answer is yes, have at it! If it's no, just enjoy the boobies and don't worry.

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RE: How can i tell if i'm bisexual? - 7/10/2010 8:00:23 AM

juliaoceania

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From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
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Personally, even though I think women are beautiful, and I am not turned off by touching one or one touching me... I do not consider myself bisexual. The way I view bisexuality is that to be bisexual in orientation that would mean I can form romantic attachments to both genders.... I don't

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(in reply to gungadin09)

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RE: How can i tell if i'm bisexual? - 7/10/2010 8:14:03 AM

WestBaySlave

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On a purely aesthetic level, I find women much more attractive than men. There's a certain coarseness in male features I find less attractive, and if I had to choose between a statue of a woman or a man, I'd go for the woman every time.

That being said, when it comes to lust and physical attraction, my mind only recognizes one gender as "sexual", and that's men. In fact I don't even like androgynous men, only the butch ones. On an intellectual level I know women are sexual, but somehow, when I look at one, I find it very, very hard to think of one that way in any sense.

(in reply to gungadin09)

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RE: How can i tell if i'm bisexual? - 7/10/2010 8:16:59 AM

MadameMarque

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I think we're each somewhere on a continuum. Kinsey was brilliant to have a scale of 1-6, for sexual orientation, with entirely heterosexual on one end, and entirely homosexual on the other. I suppose entirely bisexual, without a leaning, would be in the exact center.

To keep it as simple as "straight," "gay/Lesbian," or "bi," is much more practical, when other people just want to know whom you date. But when you think about it, these are only general terms. Each person's personal, specific orientation toward the genders is probably more complex, were we to be strictly factual.

Maybe you occasionally fantasize about someone of the same gender, but only ever have sex with those of the opposite gender. Maybe you like casual sex with the opposite sex, but only ever get seriously involved with the same sex. Maybe there's only one person you find sexually attractive who's not the gender that you normally prefer. Maybe you only like sex with one of the genders, if someone of the opposite gender is there, too - like people who are open to couples, but only if at least one of them is ___ (fill in the blank, with the gender that has to be present). Maybe you only do certain things with a certain gender, etc, etc.

When stating your orientation, people are usually really referring to with whom you would enjoy having sex. To express that more specifically, phrases such as "bisexual, leaning gay," or "bisexual, but mostly into boys," or "straight, with rare exceptions," or "I'm only looking for females," etc, are helpful. But I tend to think that for the purposes of a meet and date site such as CM, the standard three options are efficient.

Your question, GungaDin, addresses not only your primary orientation or what preference you'd act upon, but includes all of your desires, when questioning what is the orientation. As I say, I think it's on a continuum. I don't tend to categorize only enjoying looking, as making you bisexual, if we're going with the Three Party system, but it's not a hard science...so to speak.

< Message edited by MadameMarque -- 7/10/2010 8:38:57 AM >

(in reply to gungadin09)

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RE: How can i tell if i'm bisexual? - 7/10/2010 8:19:32 AM

WinsomeDefiance

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quote:

ORIGINAL: myotherself

I agree with QSM - it's a sensible question!

I find women's bodies beautiful and often sexually exciting. I love snuggling in bewbies and would happily snog a woman

But would I have sex with a woman? The idea actually squicks me. Which doesn't really make a lot of sense, since I'm happy to snuggle and snog

Does that make me bisexual? Dunno - probably not. Given the choice, I'd choose the cock every time!

I think I have a fluffy bunny clone.

I find the female form to be beautiful. And the best kissing I've ever experienced with with a woman. Our bodies are so soft and sensuous, what is not to love? The best kissing I've ever experienced was with a woman.

However, aside from snuggling and snogging, I'm still SEXUALLY attracted to men. Even though I drool over women's bodies, and would happily burry my face in breasts, I'll always choose a man for sex.

(in reply to myotherself)

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RE: How can i tell if i'm bisexual? - 7/10/2010 9:31:53 AM

Missokyst

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People are attractive but even though I think that, I am in no way bisexual. I do think sexuality runs in a spectrum, and I am clear over to the end that enjoys men. I call myself pathologically straight because the thought of my being with a female is not only physically repulsive, I also feel anger when the suggestion comes up.

My question is, when you are talking to a woman do you ever think, "Damn I want to lick that clit!"? Or do you think, "She looks nicely dressed I wonder if she wants to shop?"

(in reply to gungadin09)

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RE: How can i tell if i'm bisexual? - 7/10/2010 11:29:16 AM

pahunkboy

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From: Central Pennsylvania
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It is a good post.

But I dont think you should act on it. I say this because I sense that if it does not work out- you would have some anguish. Let me say it this way- love YOU. No other person of either sex can be as good to you as you could.

I run into this at times. The person is curious- but can not handle the fall out.

Treat YOURSELF with respect- because if you dont - no one will.

IMO- you should not do this these days. One day maybe- but for now- you are not ready emotionally for a let down.

(sorry) my 2 cents.

(in reply to Missokyst)

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RE: How can i tell if i'm bisexual? - 7/10/2010 11:39:28 AM

DCWoody

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Re OP, it doesn't matter. If you like to stare, do (though be subtle), if you meet someone ya wanna screw.....try to talk them into it, not worrying about what sex they are, and 'what' that makes you.

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RE: How can i tell if i'm bisexual? - 7/10/2010 12:29:41 PM

MasterJohnSteed

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Well I know I am straight, I love women, I love having sex with women.

I will admit that there are men, that I can say if I were gay, or bi I would jump on them like a drag queen in heat

Vin Diesel is a damn good looking man, but the thought of having sex with him would gross me out.

(in reply to DCWoody)

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RE: How can i tell if i'm bisexual? - 7/10/2010 12:33:29 PM

Toppingfrmbottom

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No, I don't think having a crush on someone of the same sex makes you bisexual.

To be bisexual, for me, it means you're sexually attracted to, and actively like to, would want to, and or do have sex with someone of the same sex, by your OWN choice. I say own choice because some people do itf or their partners becasue the partner, either demands it or likes it.

quote:

ORIGINAL: gungadin09

i think sex with a woman would be awkward. But i like looking at women's bodies. Come to think of it, i think sex with men is awkward, too. i think all sex is awkward, and kind of gross. i've had crushes on women before. But i've never wanted to sleep with one. Does that make me bisexual, or not? Sorry if this post is lame. It's Friday night, and i'm bored as hell.

pam

(in reply to gungadin09)

Post #: 17

RE: How can i tell if i'm bisexual? - 7/10/2010 12:55:30 PM

gungadin09

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Wow, what a lot of really great and helpful answers. i love it when people answer the thread, instead of going off on a tangent. Although, i might have just jinxed myself. Anyway, thanks to everyone.

pam

(in reply to Toppingfrmbottom)

Post #: 18

RE: How can i tell if i'm bisexual? - 7/10/2010 2:04:24 PM

slaveluci

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Joined: 3/2/2007
From: Little Rock, AR
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Missokyst

My question is, when you are talking to a woman do you ever think, "Damn I want to lick that clit!"?

Happens all the time! That's a great way of telling, indeed

luci

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To choose a good book, look in an inquisitor’s prohibited list. ~John Aikin

(in reply to Missokyst)

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RE: How can i tell if i'm bisexual? - 7/10/2010 2:26:44 PM

bamboozledbylove

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You aren't bisexual unless you know you are. It is an affirmative aspect of identity. Like you said, you are bored. Questions arising from boredom have no real meaning. Neither do answers arising from indifference to bored questions. Consider us as canceling each other out.

Awkward sex is the best kind of sex. Save gracefulness for ballet class. If sex was supposed to be elegant and smooth people wouldn't look so goofy naked, or have their sex parts located where they are. Sex is a duty to perform when you can't make up a good enough excuse to get out of it.

(in reply to gungadin09)

Post #: 20

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