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Today I pity the Dommes and male subs on here - 7/6/2010 9:26:12 AM

gedienstig

Posts: 155
Joined: 5/9/2010
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Well, the threat "Look what happened when I changed my orientation from switch to Domme" inspired me to carry out a little experiment I always wanted to do. I wanted to see how Domme's are treated on collarme, so I made a quick account, which anyone in their right might would immediately see is a fake. It had a fetish model, a leather clad Mistress as a profile picture, and the only text was "I am looking for naughty boys, hihi" and the name was Mistresshihi, even more of an indication that this was an obvious fake.

Still, in the 4 hours that it existed I got FIFTY mails (the only thing in my genuine mailbox is 40 real mails with a Domme I met on here, and a few spam mails from Pro Dommes spanning over two months of mail). So I got more mails in 4 hours, than I have gotten in my entire career on CM. Granted, the account was new, had the "ideal Domme" according to the porn loving do-me sub, but still, I was surprised at what people send at Domme's on here. Stories about how they were hypnotized and if the words "big bobbly head" or something was uttered or written they had to obey, pictures of men who had put a rose in their urinary tract, one guy who sent me four mails for cam sessions, who said he kissed my feet on my picture every time he saw it, and then of course a lot of one liners "Hey, I want to serve you..."

It kinda confirmed what I had always thought, but from today on, I applaud and respect the patience the Dommes on here show. Also, I kinda pity all those male subs who just send out mails with a very low chance of anyone biting for real. Also, I pity them for not even spotting that the profile was so over the top fake, that no real woman who is into this for real would just put a picture like that, and some stupid profile text. I am more disappointed than I thought I would be.

The obviously fake picture is:

Edited, because the picture didn't embed, so added the link:
http://www.racheshop.de/product_images/images/big/110117_bestraferin_big.jpg

< Message edited by gedienstig -- 7/6/2010 9:29:12 AM >

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RE: Today I pity the Dommes and male subs on here - 7/6/2010 9:51:25 AM

juliaoceania

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From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
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I do not know why people create fictional profiles and run "experiments"... it is as trollish in my mind as anyone who sent you an email...

Whenever I have opened a new account with new photos I got flooded with emails, this is not new, it has nothing to do with being a domme... it is being a female with a heartbeat....

I still get emails from fem subs to request I play with their doms. I get lesbian dommes that want me to play with them. I get male subs that email me.. this is not a problem just for dommes, it is a problem for women. These are the internets, travel at your own peril

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RE: Today I pity the Dommes and male subs on here - 7/6/2010 9:54:22 AM

heartcream

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Yeah new acct equals a ton of mail I would say. When I opened my acct I got pages of mail.

I have the patience of God, thanks yeah.

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RE: Today I pity the Dommes and male subs on here - 7/6/2010 10:04:37 AM

zephyroftheNorth

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From: The Great Frozen North
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quote:

Whenever I have opened a new account with new photos I got flooded with emails, this is not new, it has nothing to do with being a domme... it is being a female with a heartbeat....

Well female anyway, I'm not completely convinced a heartbeat is an absolute necessity lol

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RE: Today I pity the Dommes and male subs on here - 7/6/2010 10:08:28 AM

81song

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It does bring the point up about real verse online. If someone wants to pu up a profile I think they should be as honest and upfront as possible.
I do not get a ton of e-mails but it is nice to hear from some very kind Dommes from time to time. And like someone said the women here are real and should be respected. A sub should be aware of that.

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RE: Today I pity the Dommes and male subs on here - 7/6/2010 10:21:27 AM

gedienstig

Posts: 155
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Well, I didn't really make a profile to deliberately go and play with men's feelings, I was just curious what these standard mails from men would look like. Should there have been one serious e-mail from a respectful sub, I would have informed him about the truth, since it wasn't my intention to hurt anyone. I have also already removed the profile since I have gotten a taste of what Dommes (or women in general) experience, and I didn't wat it to get out of hand. Apart from this time, I have never put up a fake profile, and have only included pictures of myself, and once of a fantasy I had in my head, and I made it very clear from the beginning that that was not me in the picture. I have never trolled, and this was a once in a lifetime thing for me, where I admit curiousity got bigger than my "internethics".

I have to say, if I was approached like that daily, even if only 10 instead of the 50 mails I got on the first day, I would get seriously fed up with it and perhaps an impatient woman. So today, I have gained even more respect for the women on this site than I had before.

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RE: Today I pity the Dommes and male subs on here - 7/6/2010 10:26:27 AM

juliaoceania

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I knew what I was getting into when I posted my profile. I get some genuine emails... here is where your "experiment" is flawed, and why it is silly to do... a "real" domme would not have stock fetish photos on profile. You said yourself the profile was designed to get troll responses, and yet you are shocked when this was all you got? It seems like you designed the profile to get those emails.... seriously

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RE: Today I pity the Dommes and male subs on here - 7/6/2010 11:54:32 AM

Lockit

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Juliaoceania, I think you are missing a very important reason that Gediensting may have wanted to understand what the dominant female goes through. Have you read the mistress board? There is an ongoing dispute about how the dominant's treat submissive's. You don't go to the submissive board and find people bitching and complaining as much, about the women there. I surely don't want to bring that argument here so I won't get into it. But it is a constant thing.

Besides that, it is a good idea to try to understand the people you are looking for. So while his experiment may be flawed, it doesn't have to be perfect to get a clue about some things.

One other thing... trolls don't read. They hit on anything with a profile including submissive women. There is a constant bitch about people not reading profiles all over this site. It really doesn't matter what you have there, the trolls are going to hit and hit hard.

Many scammer's or fake profiles are most often presenting as dominant females as they can get away with being demanding about what they want and the submissive women have to play off a story of illness or death and the need for money. Or they are often men who can't get any quick type action from women and are willing to take any action they can get by creating a female profile. If you want it up the butt, some don't care who puts it there. A little online exposure, play time and tell me what to do, really doesn't matter who the one giving the orders are. They just want someone to tell them how to plug their ass.

While a fake profile may not be a fool proof experiment, it can be an indication of what it may be like to be female or femdom around here. I've seen a number of male dominant's do it. I've done my own out-of-curiosity experiements. Would I determine anything other than my take on what it means? No, but I have wondered and got answers I was satisfied with as it helped me get a picture of what might be the answers to my questions or experiments.

(Disclaimer: All my conclusions or statements you might consider I have presented as facts are based on my own interpretation of my experiences. They are not scientific fact that need to be argued.)

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RE: Today I pity the Dommes and male subs on here - 7/6/2010 12:34:02 PM

juliaoceania

Posts: 21383
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I am a woman

I joined a site that helps people hook up that enjoy kinky sex

I am not shocked or amazed by what I find here, nor do I feel sorry for myself when men who do not have enough blood to power two heads email me. He is feeling sorry for women/dommes, why?

I would suggest he make a profile with no photos, a short written description that sounds somewhat genuine, and then see who emails him... my bet is he would see a more representative sample of what CM has to offer all of us who signed up here. If we were getting nothing but junk mail, most of us would resign our accounts...

Better yet, he should go to craigslist, put up an ad in any section, and see how much spam he gets even for posting an ad for a yardsale....

My point is this is the internet, I know what goes on here. If I was unable to hold my own here I would join eharmony...

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RE: Today I pity the Dommes and male subs on here - 7/6/2010 3:03:23 PM

LadyPact

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It never stops surprising the males in My life when they see how much mail I receive. I still get more mail in a day than they will get over the course of several months. I love getting emails from the folks on the forums. Unfortunately, that means that the crap comes right along with it. There's really not much I can do in the way of filters to separate the good stuff from the junk.

Like julia, I understand it's all part of being here. Some days, it can be annoying. Most of the time, I just figure that it's par for the course.

Who I do feel bad for are the good male submissives that can potentially be lost in the white noise. Sorry fellas, but your fellow subs, bottoms, masochists, and fantasists have kind of made this a bad playing field for you. For every one of you who is really interested in pursuing this lifestyle, there have been a hundred others who have sent the kind of crap that the OP probably saw when opening a female profile. Granted the frequency of such messages dies down after the first month or so, but we still get them every day and it only makes it harder for you guys.

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RE: Today I pity the Dommes and male subs on here - 7/6/2010 3:38:46 PM

gedienstig

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Well, I knew I would get this kind of messages, I was just stunned at the amount rather than the content. I couldn't imagine (and still can't) getting this amount of useless messages, and I wouldn't go crazy but certainly quite annoyed. It really was to get a grasp about the quantity of the posts, not the quality. Heck, when I was younger, and really exploring, I played sadist/masochist games with top guys, so I had a genuine profile on a gay S&M site or two. Believe me, I know what content and disrespect male messages can contain

.

And I wouldn't want to make a "serious fake" profile to get a better representation. I just wanted to get a grasp of how much mail women really get on here, and there is no need to lure in men who were seriously looking for a relationship and disappoint them. I feel less bad about misleading someone who copy pasted a message after the fake profile being online for 10 minutes, than when someone sent me a genuine e-mail, and I would have had to disappoint them.

And I feel sorry for dommes for getting so much useless mails. I know it's on here (especially now), and you also now that it's a hazard of the internet, but it shouldn't be here. Pity was perhaps a bit too strongly expressed, but hey, headings in a newspaper are also more sensational and extreme to grasp the attention of the reading audience.

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RE: Today I pity the Dommes and male subs on here - 7/6/2010 3:48:21 PM

sunshinemiss

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quote:

ORIGINAL: juliaoceania

I do not know why people create fictional profiles and run "experiments"... it is as trollish in my mind as anyone who sent you an email...

Whenever I have opened a new account with new photos I got flooded with emails, this is not new, it has nothing to do with being a domme... it is being a female with a heartbeat....

I still get emails from fem subs to request I play with their doms. I get lesbian dommes that want me to play with them. I get male subs that email me.. this is not a problem just for dommes, it is a problem for women. These are the internets, travel at your own peril

Ahhh come on Julia... haven't you ever experimented just to see what it was like? I got dressed up in full make up drag, did the hair with curlers, and even put on pantyhose with a shee shee woo woo dress... I wanted to know what it was like to be girlyish...

Thank goodness it was just one day. *whew*

best,
sunshine

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