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RE: Flirting for Favors - 6/25/2010 8:33:35 PM   
DesFIP


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I dislike people who use charm to get things they haven't earned. I've known some over the years and as far as I can tell, most of them didn't ever mature enough to develop morals or ethics instead. Sort of like the way the top cheerleader or the high school quarterback in school doesn't develop a work ethic because stuff comes too easily. I have a great distrust of people who do this.

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RE: Flirting for Favors - 6/25/2010 8:34:55 PM   
SimplyMichael


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ooh, a woman who can flirt with her eyes? Oh be still my heart! A woman who can do it with sarcasm as well? Oh god!

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RE: Flirting for Favors - 6/25/2010 8:51:56 PM   
marie2


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I deal with less-than-cooperative customer service people in much the same way. I want to wring their neck but this works better....

Wow.....You're the first person I've gotten on the line who actually knows what they're talking about. It must be a real hassle dealing with disgruntled customers all day.....I give you a lot of credit.


90 seconds later my problem has been solved.

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RE: Flirting for Favors - 6/25/2010 10:32:01 PM   
BossyShoeBitch


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How many women:

1. Understand the almost drug like power they have over men? and
2. Use flirting as a normal method of getting along, and getting what you want/need?


Yep, I think I understand the power of flirting very well.
About 3 1/2 years ago I emailed a certain male Dom from these boards to tell him how much I enjoyed reading his posts.. I had just joined CM. This was the first message board I ever read and I wanted to start posting here but seeing the way he tore people to shreds in these threads (hey, a rhyme!), I was scared to death of him. I figured a little flattery, plus a cute picture of myself couldn't hurt.

Worked like a charm ...

< Message edited by BossyShoeBitch -- 6/25/2010 10:33:13 PM >


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RE: Flirting for Favors - 6/25/2010 10:42:58 PM   
WinsomeDefiance


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I'm pathetically incompetent when it comes to flirting.  However, being a blonde with big expressive green eyes, I can play the lost and confused ditzy blonde card, pretty effectively.  I'm embarrassed to say exactly what it got me out of, kind of embarrassed to even have been successful at it, but the shame was much cheaper than than the alternative.

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RE: Flirting for Favors - 6/25/2010 10:50:25 PM   
sunshinemiss


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'fess up! Confession is good for the soul

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RE: Flirting for Favors - 6/25/2010 10:54:16 PM   
WinsomeDefiance


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RE: Flirting for Favors - 6/25/2010 10:55:19 PM   
MissSepphora1


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Neither men nor women get what they want by "flirting with me".
Honesty and sincerity work much better than flattery.
If you don't know me, and are calling me hun, sugar, or baby, my switch immediately goes OFF!


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RE: Flirting for Favors - 6/25/2010 10:56:11 PM   
sunshinemiss


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sunny >>> <<< Winny Dee...

*smooch

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RE: Flirting for Favors - 6/26/2010 2:17:34 AM   
SimplyMichael


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Funny how some see flirting as manipulative and while I get that, it does seem to miss out on the sheer joy of flirting with a partner you adore.

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RE: Flirting for Favors - 6/26/2010 2:41:53 AM   
DesFIP


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Flirting with my partner is entirely different than flirting with strangers to get away with stuff. With my partner it's mutual seduction. With a stranger, it's manipulation.

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RE: Flirting for Favors - 6/26/2010 4:56:10 AM   
LadyAngelika


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quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

Flirting with my partner is entirely different than flirting with strangers to get away with stuff. With my partner it's mutual seduction. With a stranger, it's manipulation.


And sometimes, it's not all that black and white.

That is why I talk about authentic charm.

- LA


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RE: Flirting for Favors - 6/26/2010 5:40:48 AM   
barelynangel


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~~FR~~   grins, to me flirting isn't about dominance, its about a type of communication.  I love men, so flirting is a natural part of communicating with them.  Not all flirting results or is because something is wanted, no i will rephrase, most of the time i flirt with men as communication, i love many men's reactions to it and yes making them feel good so i do get something from it.  I enjoy the interation and the connection. 

Actually just recently the guy working on my car knock the price of work being done on my car down almost an extra $200 after he applied all the discounts he possibly could, yes as always i was flirting with him and making the woman and man connection i do when speaking to many men, was it the flirting or my skills of negotiation?   Oh yeah, there are people who don't like the idea but personally, i see nothing wrong with it.  The men i flirt with are adults, if they change their minds because i flirt with them, then i presume they are able to make that decision on their own and its NOT manipulation, its persuasion.  i simply ask.  i don't ask why they changed their minds and clarify it was the flirting that got it.   The one man i fell for hard didn't allow my flirting or seductions lol to keep him from his decisions or what he wanted.  But he also became my Master lol so...

i don't believe men are THAT weak that they are manipulated just because a woman flirts with them.  It appears some people think MEN are that weak.   I like to think of it as if i gain something from a Man due to communication and my asking, he is humoring me and is in perfect control of his decision.   To me, men always have the choice to say no and i think they simply don't choose to because they enjoy the exchange.  But again, it appears some people think men are so weak they are utterly held captive by women and are doing nothing more than being manipulated by them.  Perhaps its the other way around, they are humoring women and are in perfect control over their decisions.  Perhaps they are rewarding women for their communication rather than being manipulated by women.    Firting has been going on since the beginning of time and men and woman communicating, i am not so desperate for equality with men or to be politically correct that i would give up flirting with men.  I don't even know if i would know how to stop or want to stop, its simply part of who i am. 


angel

< Message edited by barelynangel -- 6/26/2010 5:53:38 AM >


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RE: Flirting for Favors - 6/26/2010 6:49:14 AM   
Aileen1968


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I love to flirt. It's a chance to be fun and sexy. I don't and have never used it to gain anything. I flirt for the shear joy and for the positive feedback I get.

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RE: Flirting for Favors - 6/26/2010 7:37:23 AM   
heartcream


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Flirting is like butter, it makes things better. Flirting is fun, can be funny and flirting is fun. Fun times to be had flirting. I think it is a mode of expression and can be done without being in anyway sexual. I can flirt with kids and animals, it is a way of drawing someone out and can be really comforting.

Let there be flirting.

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RE: Flirting for Favors - 6/26/2010 7:48:52 AM   
xxblushesxx


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What Angel and HeartCream said. I enjoy flirting, and yes, I've received benefits from it. Flirting, to me, is a built in reaction, it is part of me, and it's a part I enjoy.

I'd hate to think that people I like and respect would not like or respect me because I flirted and received something I didn't earn. But not enough to quit!

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RE: Flirting for Favors - 6/26/2010 7:58:47 AM   
sexyred1


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Flirting, like many forms of communication, is a lost art.

I have been a flirt since I was a kid. I am in sales, so that helps.

I find that the older I get, the more I am turned on by a man who really understands the power of intellectual flirting, banter, and the power to figure out what buttons to push, etc. Sometimes the most turned on I have ever been was from the power of words that someone used in flirting.

Flirting to me is a seduction; and these days, so many men approach with a bluntness that bores me. In our highly technological world , people are more interested in the immediate gratification than the flirting which is more of a build up. There really is a difference to me between someone saying/writing, wow you are hot instead of making a comment on something I wrote.

The other day, I was in a supermarket. This really attractive guy let me go ahead of him at a counter and I just smiled and said thank you. He then proceeded to follow me around the store, like just appear in every aisle I was in.

He just never SAID anything. Finally, I stopped and said, can I help you with anything? He started flirting which was really fun for a few minutes and then he said, I would love to keep this conversation going. I said, that sounds great.

Waiting...waiting...waiting....for a card exchange, cell number exchange, something proactive.

Instead he says, great! Tells me his name and say do you have Facebook, look me up.

I just sighed and said, wow, that was just the in person equivalent of "you have yahoo? here is my IM." He was like, Uh.uh..

I instantly lost interest and he lost an opportunity started by good flirting and ruined by being an idiot.



< Message edited by sexyred1 -- 6/26/2010 8:00:21 AM >

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RE: Flirting for Favors - 6/26/2010 7:57:17 PM   
BossyShoeBitch


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quote:

ORIGINAL: SimplyMichael

Funny how some see flirting as manipulative and while I get that, it does seem to miss out on the sheer joy of flirting with a partner you adore.


But the OP asked a specific question, and I answered that specific question. 

You know I agree with you on the joy of flirting with a partner you adore.  But like Aileen said, I also flirt because of the positive feedback I get.


_____________________________

A clever man can get out of situations a wise man never gets into...
A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.

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