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OrpheusAgonistes -> So actually, this is goodbye. (4/22/2010 7:07:31 AM)
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I started posting on these boards just to kill a little time, but found myself posting frantically every chance I got. At some point, pretty early on, it occurred to me that I'd maybe misread and misunderstood some of my own urges and inclinations and desires. It was mostly threads started by Lady Angelika that made me think quite seriously about whether I am submissive or just a thrill seeking masochist. I'd always tacitly assumed the latter, but I now believe the former to be true. This is making me really rethink things, which is healthy and all that.
Initially, I thought it was going to be enough just to redo my profile and keep hanging out here. Actually I think (and this sounds melodramatic) I need to spend some time thinking things through without running my big fat mouth all the time (or, you know, pecking away with my lithe, well formed little fingers, as the case may be). I remember Ford Prefect had the theory that as soon as humans start talking their brains shut down completely--that's definitely true in my case.
So this is it. I'll probably be back under a new name someday, because this place is a lot of fun. I just didn't want to send out a bunch of emails to people I've only spoken to on fora saying "Yo, goodbye, nice knowing you." Much better to do it out in the open. It's been fun. Hopefully I'll see you again.
Oh and I'm closing the account, because there's nothing more internet-sad than saying goodbye then hanging around to see if anybody emails you. It was cute when Tom Sawyer went to his own funeral--it's sad when a grownup tries to pull the same stunt on the internet.
Ciao guys.
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