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RE: Cheating - 3/31/2010 6:20:12 AM

DomImus

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quote:

ORIGINAL: TheHeretic
No. I have been the revenge fuckee however, and it was amazing, bucket list, fucking. Sweet deal if you can get it.

+1. "Hell hath no fury..."

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RE: Cheating - 3/31/2010 6:22:58 AM

Jeffff

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quote:

ORIGINAL: TheHeretic

No. I have been the revenge fuckee however, and it was amazing, bucket list, fucking. Sweet deal if you can get it.

Yeah.................. whew

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RE: Cheating - 3/31/2010 6:58:30 AM

sweetboundesire

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quote:

ORIGINAL: TheHeretic

quote:

ORIGINAL: bobbylynn

Have you ever been cheated on and then decided in order to get over the pain of being cheated on...to do the same and cheat on them?

No. I have been the revenge fuckee however, and it was amazing, bucket list, fucking. Sweet deal if you can get it.

nice. the "revenge fuckee" i bet it's passionate! I can see why someone would want to do it. Last time I was cheated on, i was 15 or 16, and didn't even know it till I was jumped by two girls in the girls bathroom for being "the slut." lol later, had a fight with the girl behind the high school...lots of hair pulling/punching/kicking...it was a good fight and afterwards, we became friends:)

it would be hard for someone to cheat on me. i'm a very open person.

< Message edited by sweetboundesire -- 3/31/2010 6:59:33 AM >

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RE: Cheating - 3/31/2010 4:59:58 PM

DomImus

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quote:

ORIGINAL: sweetboundesire
nice. the "revenge fuckee" i bet it's passionate! I can see why someone would want to do it. Last time I was cheated on, i was 15 or 16, and didn't even know it till I was jumped by two girls in the girls bathroom for being "the slut." lol later, had a fight with the girl behind the high school...lots of hair pulling/punching/kicking...

I used to play in bar bands on the weekends. For some inexplicable reason when you put a bunch a people together in a room with alcohol there always seems to be a few fights before the night is over. The best fights were when two women went at it - usually over a guy. I forgot how many times I lost my place in the middle of a song from being distracted hoping someone's clothing was going to get ripped off.

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RE: Cheating - 3/31/2010 5:04:47 PM

takemeforyourown

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I have been cheated on and been the cheater. They both made me feel like crap.

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RE: Cheating - 3/31/2010 6:27:52 PM

LookieNoNookie

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quote:

ORIGINAL: bobbylynn

Just wondering about this....probably stirring up the pot here however it is something i'm just wondering about and would love to hear some life experiences on this question.

Have you ever been cheated on and then decided in order to get over the pain of being cheated on...to do the same and cheat on them? If so, did it help you get over that pain or did it complicate things?

No...and....no.

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RE: Cheating - 4/4/2010 4:10:29 PM

Acer49

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quote:

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quote:

ORIGINAL: bobbylynn

Just wondering about this....probably stirring up the pot here however it is something i'm just wondering about and would love to hear some life experiences on this question.

Have you ever been cheated on and then decided in order to get over the pain of being cheated on...to do the same and cheat on them? If so, did it help you get over that pain or did it complicate things?

As the old saying goes... Two wrongs don't make a right

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RE: Cheating - 4/4/2010 7:20:14 PM

barelynangel

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I guess it would depend on what your priorities are?

Is your priority ending the relationship and moving on? Then no this (your cheating) would not be a good strategy.

Is your priority to find out what happened in your relationship with the possibility of fixing it so that you may stay together and get past this? Again, your cheating not a good strategy.

If your priority is to inflict as much drama and damage on yourself and everyone involved -- but mostly yourself -- then yeah this may be cheating a good strategy for you.

Right now, i would believe your priority would be to figure out what the relationship MEANS TO YOU. No one else, not even him but to you. If you decide that it means enough to you that you want to figure things out, then you need to find out what the relationship means to him. This may mean you guys take sometime to work things through with yourselves and then start figuring it out together. If you come to the conclusion that the cost of working towards a possible regaining of trust and a strong relationship is too much, then forget the blame and start putting a plan together to move on.

I really hate when people's advise with something like this is get out. That is not always the answer. There are many many relationships in this world that have chosen to work through this awful injury to the trust of the relationship and work to put it back together and many make it and become stronger because of same.

No one but you can make a determination of what you may want from this relationship. Do not on gut instinct go out and "cheat" on him, and take sometime before making any final decision. Yes give yourself time to be angry, hurt, etc etc etc. But also give yourself time to think what is best for you beyond the anger, hurt, etc. You owe yourself that much.

The relationship may be irrepairable. If this is what you determine, then its time to put yourself first and your focus should be on the future, not on what he did in the past. The relationship may be repairable, if this is what you determine than again put yourself first and focus on the future, and figure out how you can together repair the damage to your foundation.

Good luck.

angel

< Message edited by barelynangel -- 4/4/2010 7:21:15 PM >

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RE: Cheating - 4/5/2010 9:03:31 PM

bobbylynn

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Thank you angel. Very wise advice. So many truths in what you said. i am certainly thinking about all this.
bobbylynn

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RE: Cheating - 4/6/2010 3:48:13 AM

switch2please

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quote:

ORIGINAL: DomImus

quote:

ORIGINAL: TheHeretic
No. I have been the revenge fuckee however, and it was amazing, bucket list, fucking. Sweet deal if you can get it.

+1. "Hell hath no fury..."

...like a woman scorned, and hell hath no imagination like a teenage girl ;)

I was cheated on, and I did revenge-fuck, and it was GOOD - and now I don't see the logic in expecting one person to be my everything or me to fulfill my partner's every want/need, so I am open/poly and I associate with more ethical responsible people.

Now if someone was okay with receiving a revenge-fuck as just a personified means to a bad end, I don't know if I would want to fuck them anyway...just one more reason to love the vibrator!

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RE: Cheating - 4/6/2010 4:42:53 AM

jbcurious

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Now I think I am stirring the pot a bit...

What do you consider cheating? Is it actually fucking someone other than your partner? Is it a blow job, finger bang, a kiss with intent?

How do play sessions come into it? I've read numerous posts that say in a D/s M/s relationship the D or M has a right to play with other s/s and has the right to demand his s/s make herself available to another D/M...

So to make it cheating... that would imply that it's done "behind the others back" Which then makes me ask... Wouldn't any act, outside of sex, done behind the others back, be considered cheating as well?

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RE: Cheating - 4/6/2010 4:58:25 AM

BKSir

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Nope. I'm ashamed to admit that I've been on both sides of the equation (with separate people), and they both hurt equally as badly. It's truly a case of 'two wrongs do not make a right'. It's also a case of "If you ever do that again, you rotten bastard, I'll cut your balls off and personally hand them to the judge at the divorce trial." ;)

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RE: Cheating - 4/6/2010 11:20:45 AM

MotherCucking333

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All I can say is..Karma...

I never used to think that karma existed..until you realize..it actually does.

If they cheated...the relationship was never meant to be in the first place.

Yes...I also believe in once a cheater always a cheater

“An eye for an eye would make the whole world blind.”

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RE: Cheating - 4/6/2010 12:33:29 PM

switch2please

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What constitutes cheating is usually decided by the person being cheated ON...
but it seems to me that anything sexual/sensual done with intent behind a partner's back is cheating.
In other words: never give another man's woman a foot massage.

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