RE: Do only a score of people fit YOUR search criteria who have been logged on in the past 3 months? (Full Version)

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juliaoceania -> RE: Do only a score of people fit YOUR search criteria who have been logged on in the past 3 months? (1/26/2010 10:10:00 AM)

When I was in the market....

I looked within 50 to 100 miles... and I had a 15 year age differential. I was only looking for dominant men. There were dozens that contacted me, and I was living in Central California. I do not know how many of them there were, because I waited for them to contact me. I ended up with someone that lived about 6 hour drive away... which was exceedingly hard...

I have not been looking mind you,  but I have a search criteria up for when I log in the same as it has been since I joined this site. The only thing I have  changed is my city there are dozens of different names that come up. I do not know how many would be potential dominants for me because I am not truly shopping around for one right now.... for a few different reasons, mostly career ones.




oceangem -> RE: Do only a score of people fit YOUR search criteria who have been logged on in the past 3 months? (1/26/2010 10:11:04 AM)

I live in Canada, i don't have the choice of province listed in the drop down menu, nor do i have the postal code search option. In the text or city, if i put in British Columbia i get 8 in the last 3 months, if i put in BC a grand total of 50 in the 3 months, but those can be anywhere from Northern BC to the Island, if they even give a hint to where they are in BC in their profile. my search is set to 45 -56, Male Dominants, Canada.




popeye1250 -> RE: Do only a score of people fit YOUR search criteria who have been logged on in the past 3 months? (1/26/2010 10:40:16 AM)

One thing CM needs to do is not let anymore males into the site.
How many times have we heard the women in here complain of being inundated with "hundreds" of messages from males? It's just too lopsided as things stand now. There shouldn't be a ratio of 100 to 1 males to females.
But, CM probably won't do anything about it as "the more members the more advertising dollars" and then who cares if there's 100,000 males in here and only 50 females?
And that seems to be a problem in all the sites. I was in "Alt" for two years and *never* had even one reply to my ad!
I started looking around and saw that there was a huge ratio of males vs females. Don't waste your money on those sites if you're a guy!




LaTigresse -> RE: Do only a score of people fit YOUR search criteria who have been logged on in the past 3 months? (1/26/2010 10:41:48 AM)

I believe if they compared quality to quantity, the ratio would be a bit different...




Rhodes85 -> RE: Do only a score of people fit YOUR search criteria who have been logged on in the past 3 months? (1/26/2010 2:29:02 PM)

I don't use searches. Not enough people in Nova Scotia on here for that. Though ironically the one time I did I ended up meeting somebody. I generally stick to people in Nova Scotia, Ontario and British Columbia cause i'm frequently in all three provinces. Though occasionally i'll message someone from the US. No harm in trying right?

quote:

I believe if they compared quality to quantity, the ratio would be a bit different...


I agree.




AnimusRex -> RE: Do only a score of people fit YOUR search criteria who have been logged on in the past 3 months? (1/26/2010 3:08:07 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: popeye1250
One thing CM needs to do is not let anymore males into the site.


Amen, brother. Thats why my standard advice to new males is "Send a cock pic! And they all love being called filthy whore bitches! Tell them you want to shove a cattle prod up their ass and shit on their pretty face!"

It helps to cut down on the competition.




AnimusRex -> RE: Do only a score of people fit YOUR search criteria who have been logged on in the past 3 months? (1/26/2010 3:14:04 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: EbonyWood
Listen to Rex. He knows. He may in fact be camped within 25 feet of your front door right now. Taking a head count.


She is probably wondering why the FedEx guy, mailman, pizza guy and Jehova's Witness all look strikingly similar.

Landshark!


Er...Candygram!




Missokyst -> RE: Do only a score of people fit YOUR search criteria who have been logged on in the past 3 months? (1/26/2010 3:29:34 PM)

LMAO.. omg.. good thing my teeth are real, I would have spit them out.

quote:

ORIGINAL: AnimusRex


quote:

ORIGINAL: popeye1250
One thing CM needs to do is not let anymore males into the site.


Amen, brother. Thats why my standard advice to new males is "Send a cock pic! And they all love being called filthy whore bitches! Tell them you want to shove a cattle prod up their ass and shit on their pretty face!"

It helps to cut down on the competition.






DomImus -> RE: Do only a score of people fit YOUR search criteria who have been logged on in the past 3 months? (1/26/2010 4:25:54 PM)

I have been in an LTR since I have been on CM and haven't done any searching here. I have some general set of criteria entered that would be indicative of what I'd entered if I was looking. It mostly just controls the pictures that pop up when I log in. Not a huge assortment of viable candidates. As much as play parties aren't really my bag that is where I would focus my energies if I was looking much like I did in my bar days. The big difference is that at play parties every dominant has a flogger. In my bar days I was usually the only guy in the room with a Les Paul hanging off his shoulder. Far less effort involved to get noticed.

Back when I was on bondage.com and was looking I was in a poly situation (open marriage) and it was essentially useless to actually look since my experience was that most women are not looking for a guy in that dynamic. So I just put up a profile and waited. I had a minimum of success there. Oddly enough I had the most success on IRC, which is far more random than any of these websites. Sometimes you get lucky where you least expect it.






DesFIP -> RE: Do only a score of people fit YOUR search criteria who have been logged on in the past 3 months? (1/26/2010 9:21:45 PM)

Yes, there are exactly 19 people within 25 miles of here within ten years of my age.

The Man lived 125 miles away. Very doable for weekend visits. So if you can't find enough of a population base within those very narrow parameters it should tell you that you need to widen those parameters. It really isn't the end of the world if the right person lives 40 miles from you. But if you insist on keeping the options as narrow as possible while knowing that means you won't meet anybody what that says to me is that you don't want to meet anyone and that's why you're insisting on things that you know don't work.




MistressTonya2u -> RE: Do only a score of people fit YOUR search criteria who have been logged on in the past 3 months? (1/26/2010 10:07:01 PM)

I put in a certain age group and withiin the entire state of virginia, I got results for about 22 females and around 40 males.
At 37, I want someone at least 30 years old.
I tried dropping the age limit to 18, and the results almost tripled.




popeye1250 -> RE: Do only a score of people fit YOUR search criteria who have been logged on in the past 3 months? (1/27/2010 10:01:47 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Missokyst

LMAO.. omg.. good thing my teeth are real, I would have spit them out.

quote:

ORIGINAL: AnimusRex


quote:

ORIGINAL: popeye1250
One thing CM needs to do is not let anymore males into the site.


Amen, brother. Thats why my standard advice to new males is "Send a cock pic! And they all love being called filthy whore bitches! Tell them you want to shove a cattle prod up their ass and shit on their pretty face!"

It helps to cut down on the competition.






Yeah, now that reply was of "Popeye quality!"




afkarr -> RE: Do only a score of people fit YOUR search criteria who have been logged on in the past 3 months? (1/27/2010 7:45:43 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: AnimusRex


quote:

ORIGINAL: EbonyWood
Listen to Rex. He knows. He may in fact be camped within 25 feet of your front door right now. Taking a head count.


She is probably wondering why the FedEx guy, mailman, pizza guy and Jehova's Witness all look strikingly similar.

Landshark!


Er...Candygram!



I was kind of wondering about that extra special dipping sauce the pizza guy was offering if I got on my knees, and if naked and handcuffed in the shower was some new kind of Jehovah witness baptism ritual[:D]

Back to the original topic, maybe there would be better luck if people re-thought their ideas of "compatability", Compatible can't always be narrowed down to a laundry lists if common interests. The FWB and I have very different tastes in some things, but like each other on a personal basis, found some common gound and can meet each other in the middle on others. As long as the lives for list of one isn't the hard limit list of the other, everything else is negotiable.

I understand there are those who scorn the FWB concept, holding out for "The One, forever and ever". My experience has been that sometimes the most enduring relationships, kinky and not, are those that comes from friendship, all too often the "instant soulmate" connections can't withstand the light of reality.




pompeii -> RE: Do only a score of people fit YOUR search criteria who have been logged on in the past 3 months? (1/27/2010 9:36:36 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: AnimusRex
That sounds about right; when I put the same parameters in my search (I am in Orange County) I get the same results.
Which is why I have commented before, that when you take the entire dating pool and narrow it down to kinky people, then further by geography, power orientation, and list of interests, the number of eligible partners we can find is amazingly small, even in large kink-friendly cities like SF and LA.


Yeah. My initial search nets exactly 15 women, and the ONLY criteria are (a) female, (b), within 25 miles, and (c) logged in within the past 3 months. And this is before any age or height or weight or proclivity filters are applied!

If I then look for forum posts (which shows a measure of intelligence), I'll wager I'm down to 1 or 2 at the most. No big deal. I'm not complaining ... just stating my results and wondering whether others have similar findings. I'll keep reading this thread to see what I can learn from you others.




pompeii -> RE: Do only a score of people fit YOUR search criteria who have been logged on in the past 3 months? (1/27/2010 9:58:31 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: antipode
I can't understand how you could possibly be interested in somebody who has not logged in for three, two or even one months...


I don't disagree. But if I limit the search to one month, the number of potentials decreases drastically.

Checking m figures, I just realized I previously erred on what my initial search was. I "said" it was for (a) female, (b) within 25 miles, and then sorted by (c) time last logged in. I just realized that I was ALSO filtering on "They Are Seeking" Dominant Men", and their age limits were "35 to 60" and the weight limit was set at "140". I never change these so I didn't realize they were set.

When I open up the age, weight, and seeking category, indeed, lots and lots of folks seem to have logged in within the past month in my local area. Of course, if they listed their age as 20-something, I'll have a hard time believing they're real (the scammers seem to love that decade), and if they weigh more than I do, again, it might be harder to play, and lastly, if they're not subs, well, then the allure may not wholly be there ... so, I think the search criteria are (for me) reasonable.

But, I do wish to correct my previous statement as opening up the search for test purposes DOES show a lot of hits of folks logged in within the past month (in the San Francisco south bay area).




pompeii -> RE: Do only a score of people fit YOUR search criteria who have been logged on in the past 3 months? (1/27/2010 10:13:12 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: popeye1250
who cares if there's 100,000 males in here and only 50 females?


What always amazes me, even to this day, is that everywhere I go there are 100:1 males to females ... yet I KNOW that the ratio of male:female "people" should be just about 1:1.

I guess I'm going where all the other males are going ... maybe I should change my tactics! :)




pompeii -> RE: Do only a score of people fit YOUR search criteria who have been logged on in the past 3 months? (1/27/2010 10:20:14 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LaTigresse
I believe if they compared quality to quantity, the ratio would be a bit different...


I've said before, that, I think it's just as hard for a guy to find the "right" gal as for the gal to find the right guy - but the reasons and ratios are different.

For the guy:
- The problem is finding "a" gal ... (out of the very few possibilities available)

For the gal:
- The problem is finding a "quality" guy ... (out of the vastly overwhelming possibilities available)

It reminds me of the problem of getting an "A" in college courses ... I went to a liberal arts school, so, I took the (hard) sciences and the (soft) humanities. Both were difficult to get an A but for vastly different reasons. In Organic Chemistry, the tests were so hard you could get an A with a 40 to 50% grade; while in Macroeconomics, the tests were so easy that you practically had to be 99% right to squeak by with an A since both are graded on a bell curve.

Methinks it's a similar situation with the searching of men for women versus searching of women for men.

It's amazing that the problem is so different for each side




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