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pridedenied -> Question (12/24/2009 9:29:12 AM)

I like a pre-op transgirl. It's not a fetish. I just like her for who she is. She has had her heart broken and also has a lot of issues with her sexuality. I don't want to scare her away but at the same time I really want to be closer to her. How would you go about helping this to happen?




kiwisub12 -> RE: Question (12/24/2009 9:30:43 AM)

Ask her to lunch. She will either say yes or no. [:)]




LafayetteLady -> RE: Question (12/24/2009 9:34:25 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: pridedenied

I like a pre-op transgirl. It's not a fetish. I just like her for who she is. She has had her heart broken and also has a lot of issues with her sexuality. I don't want to scare her away but at the same time I really want to be closer to her. How would you go about helping this to happen?


So this is someone who is currently on the road to the surgery to become a female, right? You "like" her in a romantic way? You don't say whether she likes males or females, which kind of makes a difference don't ya think? I would say at this point, just be her friend. This is not the time that she needs anyone having "expectations" from her, but a time when she just needs to move along at her own pace. I'm sure though that having a friend who is just there for her will help.




LadyPact -> RE: Question (12/24/2009 9:34:43 AM)

So, you're basically asking us how to date?  Why would this person be any different than any other person who would interest you?




pridedenied -> RE: Question (12/24/2009 9:47:32 AM)

i suppose in a way i am just asking how to date. She is a little more complicated than the average person though.




LadyAngelika -> RE: Question (12/24/2009 10:10:03 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: pridedenied

i suppose in a way i am just asking how to date. She is a little more complicated than the average person though.


The fact that you view her that way might be a huge part of the problem.

- LA




Jeffff -> RE: Question (12/24/2009 10:17:55 AM)

How is it more difficult?


"How about dinner friday?"


Jeff




Justme696 -> RE: Question (12/24/2009 11:22:51 AM)

quote:

She is a little more complicated than the average person though.


don't tell her that..else the date will be short.




SirJohnMandevill -> RE: Question (12/24/2009 11:51:19 AM)

I knew someone in her exact situation 10 years ago. I can only echo what LadyPact said: Treat her as you would anyone else you might be interested in.

Play shouldn't be any different from any other woman. If your relationship includes sex, obviously you'll have to work around certain things.


[sm=chug.gif] (Purveyor of Fine, Handcrafted Kink)




DesFIP -> RE: Question (12/24/2009 12:44:26 PM)

"Jane, I don't know if you've noticed, but I'm very interested in you. Can I ask if you have any feelings towards me?"




CougarStud -> RE: Question (12/24/2009 5:02:36 PM)

I have a friend who is pre-op ftm, well actually she/he had her boobs removed.  So she/he starts asking me about dating women and I say "I thought you liked men" and he replies"I did, but now I am a guy, maybe I should date girls.

I told him, that maybe he sould just be gay.

It can be very confusing during the transition.  First and foremost, respect the gender she calls herself.  Keep it friendly till you knowwhat her sexual/romantic interests are.




DarkSteven -> RE: Question (12/24/2009 5:43:10 PM)

Spend time with her.  Get to know her.  The physical stuff will either happen, or else it won't.

If it's the person I think it is, then the two of you are both submissive.  How's that going to work?




antipode -> RE: Question (12/24/2009 8:58:49 PM)

quote:

It's not a fetish. I just like her for who she is.


There isn't a rulebook for transgenders. (S)he is just another unique human being. It isn't unusual for transgender people to be in the same relationship before and after, so you're covered there as well. I am just puzzled by your question: "How would we go about helping this to happen". Why would you need help? Why would you scare her away? Have you expressed yourself to this person? Assuming you have dated before, why would this be different?




AlexCutwright -> RE: Question (12/24/2009 9:16:08 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

"Jane, I don't know if you've noticed, but I'm very interested in you. Can I ask if you have any feelings towards me?"



Though I'm young and probably one of the least qualified to answer you, I have to say that I agree in entirety with DesFIP here. Coming forward with your interest and being gentle with it's presentation is probably the best thing you can do, especially when you're unsure of what's fair and/or kosher in this situation. Just being honest and asking where they stand on the issue seems best, and if something can or will happen, then all you can do is wait and make the best of what comes.




TemptingNviceSub -> RE: Question (12/24/2009 9:26:17 PM)

Being a good friend is an excellent start..positive exhange of thoughts and ideas..see where that leads first..then if and when time is right you explore other avenues of possibilities...Tempting




fadedshadow -> RE: Question (12/25/2009 12:20:07 AM)

be a nice person to this person, then maybe the person will be happy =]




HumiliatedOinker -> RE: Question (12/25/2009 12:51:08 AM)

Being the person is scared of getting hurt, show the person that you would be there, see how the indivisual reacts. I also agree with those who have said to go along with how you would normally show someone your interested in them.




antipode -> RE: Question (12/25/2009 9:32:17 AM)

quote:

She is a little more complicated than the average person though.


Relationship 101: there is no such thing as an "average person".




osf -> RE: Question (12/25/2009 9:42:18 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: antipode

quote:

She is a little more complicated than the average person though.


Relationship 101: there is no such thing as an "average person".



is too

i'm the only average person in the world




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