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Take me..kidnap me..leave me no choice.. - 11/30/2009 1:40:30 PM

GYPSYMAMBO

Posts: 660
Joined: 9/26/2009
Status: offline

DAILY I get messages like this...and sometimes get messages like this after discussion for a while on line and even in person..
after on line...and a time period of knowing each other has passed.

A sub/slave that wants to "pretend"(in his mind) he has been kidnapped..forced..has no choice or was taken by the BIG D...is not a man I wish to have a relationship with.

Is he weak...unsure..and un-willing to look at his own process and WHY he wants to or feels he needs to submit..

IS he in a fantasy...he may be unstable...or more..??
I feel this is a very dependent man..

I feel he must CHOOSE in his mind and heart to submit and serve.
Simply my opinion

feedback?
your opinion...?

GM

< Message edited by GYPSYMAMBO -- 11/30/2009 2:05:05 PM >

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RE: Take me..kidnap me..leave me no choice.. - 11/30/2009 1:55:41 PM

NormalOutside

Posts: 622
Joined: 1/8/2008
Status: offline

My opinion on what, how awesomely dominant you are? No thanks.

Nice brag thread ;)

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Post #: 2

RE: Take me..kidnap me..leave me no choice.. - 11/30/2009 1:56:12 PM

trealeon

Posts: 180
Joined: 4/7/2007
Status: offline

GM,

I think this may fall in with those people who may only be in it for the "fantasy" and nothing more. They may only see D/s as something that's a bedroom fantasy once and a while and not a lifestyle of submission that goes beyond bedroom play. I know for me, I often have that problem with girls, especially young girls, who just want to pretend and nothing more and don't seem to understand that there actually is more. In some cases under this desire to have this pretend fantasy is an actual true submissive waiting to understand why they have these desires to begin with. I've seen that once or twice and if they want to understand more, then I help them. But the vast majority just have an itch that needs to be scratched or a curiosity about it and don't want anything more than that one time event, or may think they want it often and then just get bored and move on to the next interesting thing.

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Post #: 3

RE: Take me..kidnap me..leave me no choice.. - 11/30/2009 1:58:40 PM

lally2

Posts: 2621
Joined: 4/16/2009
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for what its worth i agree

i think that submission can be so garbled a message in a persons head that it can take ages to unravel it all. just the simple act of letting go aint so simple or easy to do. giving over control to another isnt easy either, there is always that little voice banging away in youre head saying 'yes but i want it this way or id do it that way'. - actually trusting someone or put another way, giving someone else the choice to do it there way and none other can create a huge internal struggle within a sub, no matter how much they might want it.

most subs i would imagine have been taught since they could walk pretty much that they are their own 'lifes master' - it is going against sociatal training to go the complete opposite way to that and hand it all over.

so i guess what these people are doing or trying to do is throw the reins at you and say 'here - and if i dont have to think about it, if i dont even have to own whats happening to me then it should all be ok'

its just the early struggles of self realisation as a slave maybe. eventually coming around to the realisation that enslavement, if its worth a bean is mindful, given thoughtfully, conciously and proactively.

_____________________________

So all I have to do in order to serve him, is to work out exactly how improbable he is, feed that figure into the finite improbability generator, give him a fresh cup of really hot tea ... and turn him on!

(in reply to GYPSYMAMBO)

Post #: 4

RE: Take me..kidnap me..leave me no choice.. - 11/30/2009 1:59:50 PM

breatheasone

Posts: 4004
Joined: 7/14/2007
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Ok, people who believe they want that kind of thing 24/7 are off their rockers for real, ....But it DOES sound like a great weekend, does it not??

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(in reply to GYPSYMAMBO)

Post #: 5

RE: Take me..kidnap me..leave me no choice.. - 11/30/2009 2:08:48 PM

Aileen1968

Posts: 6062
Joined: 12/12/2007
From: I miss Shore, New Jersey
Status: offline

One of my biggest fantasies is a kidnap/rape fantasy. I'm in a real time relationship that is gearing up to 24/7 in the next few years.
He knows this fantasy and has said that someday, somewhere, sometime I will find myself thrown in the back of a trunk.
It has to be as realistic as possible for it to mentally work for us which means I won't know when. It could be tomorrow or a year from now....
As a scene it wouldn't work. But then again, we don't "scene".

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Post #: 6

RE: Take me..kidnap me..leave me no choice.. - 11/30/2009 2:15:49 PM

Missokyst

Posts: 6041
Joined: 9/9/2006
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I always saw this sort of request as a desire to relinquish all responsibility. Imagine.. some one is keeping captive for their own purposes.. and all you have to do is submit. No more working outside the home, or having to deal with life and issues like credit, house payments, food, ect. There is a captor ready to do your bidding.. err.. I mean waiting to have you lick or suck.
Plueeeeeeeese.

(in reply to GYPSYMAMBO)

Post #: 7

RE: Take me..kidnap me..leave me no choice.. - 11/30/2009 2:21:39 PM

naswitch

Posts: 20
Joined: 11/25/2008
Status: offline

yeah ... seen a lot of that here and my own rule of thumb is that a sub using the words "i want to be forced to....." is at least a yellow flag and usually turns red before much else is said. yep I'm sizable enough to force someone, but like you, I want them to submit because it's who they are ....

I think when they describe it that way, they want role-play. Which is not a bad thing, but I also ask, "Is it the real thing?"
Seems a very common fantasy that I attribute to a lot more fantasy than reality where lifestyle is concerned.

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RE: Take me..kidnap me..leave me no choice.. - 11/30/2009 2:32:05 PM

CelticSubM

Posts: 102
Joined: 3/12/2004
Status: offline

I think all of us, dominant, submissive, vanilla, whatever, have moments when we feel like escaping from the complexities of life, when we wish that everything could be simple, easy, and clear-cut. For submissives, the fantasy of being "forced" seems to offer an effortless way of suddenly realizing all one's desires. For many persons, much of the allure of submission lies in the notion of being "forced" to do the things one has always longed to do but been afraid or ashamed to do. The parallels with female "rape" fantasies are obvious. Rape fantasies always involve being "forced," "taken" by someone the woman secretly desires. Unless a particular submissive happens to be obsessed with such fantasies, I don't see them as having a lot of significance.

(in reply to naswitch)

Post #: 9

RE: Take me..kidnap me..leave me no choice.. - 11/30/2009 3:04:24 PM

DesFIP

Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline

I cannot begin to tell you how many romance books I read when I was young that had this as the premise, young beauty kidnapped by pirate who then falls in love with her. So is every woman who ever read a Rosemary Rodgers novel weak? I don't think so.

Not to mention rape play, that's the same thing, kidnapped and taken by force.

Just because you don't get off on it doesn't mean those of us who do are bad. Your kink is okay but mine isn't? Puh-lease!

It's very simple. It's a desire in a world of complexity and disappointment for someone to find you so overwhelmingly desirable that they throw over all societal conventions to have you. Of course, those of us who do this only want the someone to be someone we actually desire ourselves, but why not?

One of my fondest memories from when we first got together was him watching me bend over the bed sorting clean laundry and suddenly pushing me into it, ripping off my panties and taking me without me saying yes, no or maybe. It was primal, it showed his desire and lust for me and it was powerful and wonderful. Not weak, unsure, and unstable.

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Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!

(in reply to CelticSubM)

Post #: 10

RE: Take me..kidnap me..leave me no choice.. - 11/30/2009 3:06:55 PM

AnimusRex

Posts: 2165
Joined: 5/13/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Missokyst
I always saw this sort of request as a desire to relinquish all responsibility. Imagine.. some one is keeping captive for their own purposes.. and all you have to do is submit. No more working outside the home, or having to deal with life and issues like credit, house payments, food, ect. There is a captor ready to do your bidding.. err.. I mean waiting to have you lick or suck.
Plueeeeeeeese.

Bingo. The weekend captive fantasy is actually intensely erotic, but the ones who claim to want this for a life, are self-medicating I think.

But in a larger sense- what if we could live like O and Stephan, or any other erotic literature? The truth is, I believe it would get incredibly boring, and repetitious. Day after day, sex scene after sex scene, living a life without variation, change, or growth.
Prison is a punishment not because you are locked up for a weekend but because you are locked up for weeks, months, years.

(in reply to Missokyst)

Post #: 11

RE: Take me..kidnap me..leave me no choice.. - 11/30/2009 3:13:34 PM

LadyHibiscus

Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline

Celeste, there is a world of difference between the hot scene you described and the kind of mail that GM is talking about. Sure, we all want to escape from reality from time to time, but many (most? all?) femdoms get mail of a certain "type" and the mindless fantasy of being LITERALLY chained up all day is one of the biggies.

So, a person is chained up all day, I get to do the work outside the home to pay for them, their healthcare, etc etc? oh no Mistress, feed me garbage and you don't need to take me to the doctor. And so it goes from there. Come ON now. If you are my slave, you are going to EARN it, pal!

GM, I wish I had an answer for you about these guys, and WHY they are so vehement about their senseless fantasy. And yes, I call it SENSELESS because it has no thought behind it. To be imprisoned for a day, or a weekend, or just to have that comfy cage to retreat to at night? Great. I know folks that sleep in cages, or stay in them when the chores are done. It's the fantasy that requires CONSTANT work and attention from the dominant that I take exception to.

Once, for "fun", I treated someone like an actual slave--ie, I paid NO attention to him unless I needed him, and went about my business. If I wanted something, I asked for it. How sad that all I wanted was a beverage, and a skein-holder while I watched BBC America! Somehow it was all that much less fun to be objectified in a REAL LIFE manner. Hmph.

Disgruntled Hib
(grrrls are better dagnabbit!)

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Post #: 12

RE: Take me..kidnap me..leave me no choice.. - 11/30/2009 3:18:21 PM

Kyoki

Posts: 69
Joined: 5/3/2009
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: breatheasone

Ok, people who believe they want that kind of thing 24/7 are off their rockers for real, ....But it DOES sound like a great weekend, does it not??

This sounds about right.

(in reply to breatheasone)

Post #: 13

RE: Take me..kidnap me..leave me no choice.. - 11/30/2009 3:20:25 PM

Kyoki

Posts: 69
Joined: 5/3/2009
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Missokyst

I always saw this sort of request as a desire to relinquish all responsibility. Imagine.. some one is keeping captive for their own purposes.. and all you have to do is submit. No more working outside the home, or having to deal with life and issues like credit, house payments, food, ect. There is a captor ready to do your bidding.. err.. I mean waiting to have you lick or suck.
Plueeeeeeeese.

I've wondered the same thing! To be honest, it scares me to think of being in that position, but it sounds great as a fantasy. I know that I have stuff I want to do though. Being in that position is just... no. I want a life, and life isn't about being chained to a wall all day.

(in reply to Missokyst)

Post #: 14

RE: Take me..kidnap me..leave me no choice.. - 11/30/2009 4:04:54 PM

CelticSubM

Posts: 102
Joined: 3/12/2004
Status: offline

A lot of bdsm fantasies that seem very erotic in the mind or when enacted briefly and occasionally would be impractical, boring or both on any regular basis. Those who haven't learned that will learn it at some point. Long-term bdsm relationships have a strong tendency to "regress to the mean", to become more and more similar to "vanilla" romances. I suspect that those which begin with the more extreme or outré scenarios are the fastest to regress to the mean.

(in reply to Kyoki)

Post #: 15

RE: Take me..kidnap me..leave me no choice.. - 11/30/2009 4:10:19 PM

LadyAngelika

Posts: 8070
Joined: 7/4/2004
Status: offline

quote:

feedback?
your opinion...?

I used to tell them to send me $5000 to set up the fantansy and then I never heard from them again ;-)

- LA

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(in reply to GYPSYMAMBO)

Post #: 16

RE: Take me..kidnap me..leave me no choice.. - 11/30/2009 4:30:35 PM

DesFIP

Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus

Celeste, there is a world of difference between the hot scene you described and the kind of mail that GM is talking about. Sure, we all want to escape from reality from time to time, but many (most? all?) femdoms get mail of a certain "type" and the mindless fantasy of being LITERALLY chained up all day is one of the biggies.

But it's a fantasy dreamed of by people who have never had the opportunity to experience any reality. Of course it's unrealistic. If it was realistic it wouldn't be a fantasy. But it still expresses that need to be utterly desired. Most women when young learn what it is to be wanted and pursued. Most men never do.

But assuming that because someone wants to be desired and pursued they are weak and unstable is sad. I have no doubt that a few days of being chained to the bed and 'forced' to have hot sex would be wonderful and a month would have them dreaming of controlling the remote to the tv.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!

(in reply to LadyHibiscus)

Post #: 17

RE: Take me..kidnap me..leave me no choice.. - 11/30/2009 4:36:21 PM

CelticSubM

Posts: 102
Joined: 3/12/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

...Most women when young learn what it is to be wanted and pursued. Most men never do...

Oh, I don't know about that. I knew some pretty aggressive women in my youth. And I've known a few since.

(in reply to DesFIP)

Post #: 18

RE: Take me..kidnap me..leave me no choice.. - 11/30/2009 4:40:53 PM

LadyHibiscus

Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus

Celeste, there is a world of difference between the hot scene you described and the kind of mail that GM is talking about. Sure, we all want to escape from reality from time to time, but many (most? all?) femdoms get mail of a certain "type" and the mindless fantasy of being LITERALLY chained up all day is one of the biggies.

But it's a fantasy dreamed of by people who have never had the opportunity to experience any reality. Of course it's unrealistic. If it was realistic it wouldn't be a fantasy. But it still expresses that need to be utterly desired. Most women when young learn what it is to be wanted and pursued. Most men never do.

But assuming that because someone wants to be desired and pursued they are weak and unstable is sad. I have no doubt that a few days of being chained to the bed and 'forced' to have hot sex would be wonderful and a month would have them dreaming of controlling the remote to the tv.

That's what I mean about it being TOTALLY different. The fantasies me (and my compatriots) get presented with are NOT the uber-hot objectifcation stuff that is about desire. They are about being removed from desirability! It's almost like infantilism with chains... the being chained up sagas do NOT involve hot sex, though sometimes the toilet thing comes into play, or smothering or some such. Mostly it's all about chain me up and abuse me/ignore me/degrade me more. The traditional memememememeeeeeeee that men approach the femdom fantasy with.

I agree with you otherwise, as I so often do! The notion that men want to be pursued and desired seems alien, and when I do pursue men they are often almost frightened, it puts them in a precarious position. Say yes, or be "manly"?

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[page 23 girl]

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Post #: 19

RE: Take me..kidnap me..leave me no choice.. - 11/30/2009 4:59:06 PM

Silence8

Posts: 833
Joined: 11/2/2009
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus

Celeste, there is a world of difference between the hot scene you described and the kind of mail that GM is talking about. Sure, we all want to escape from reality from time to time, but many (most? all?) femdoms get mail of a certain "type" and the mindless fantasy of being LITERALLY chained up all day is one of the biggies.

So, a person is chained up all day, I get to do the work outside the home to pay for them, their healthcare, etc etc? oh no Mistress, feed me garbage and you don't need to take me to the doctor. And so it goes from there. Come ON now. If you are my slave, you are going to EARN it, pal!

GM, I wish I had an answer for you about these guys, and WHY they are so vehement about their senseless fantasy. And yes, I call it SENSELESS because it has no thought behind it. To be imprisoned for a day, or a weekend, or just to have that comfy cage to retreat to at night? Great. I know folks that sleep in cages, or stay in them when the chores are done. It's the fantasy that requires CONSTANT work and attention from the dominant that I take exception to.

Once, for "fun", I treated someone like an actual slave--ie, I paid NO attention to him unless I needed him, and went about my business. If I wanted something, I asked for it. How sad that all I wanted was a beverage, and a skein-holder while I watched BBC America! Somehow it was all that much less fun to be objectified in a REAL LIFE manner. Hmph.

Disgruntled Hib
(grrrls are better dagnabbit!)

In terms of the economics of it... you could always start a website... 24/7 slave douche!

Admit it, a lot of people would want to watch. If it were a female slave, the demand would skyrocket.

I'm actually somewhat surprised no one's tried this already. There might be some bizarre issues with labor law...

(in reply to LadyHibiscus)

Post #: 20

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