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I Learned the Truth! - 11/10/2009 8:14:23 PM

SnowRanger

Posts: 503
Joined: 5/25/2008
From: Sinsinnati
Status: offline

Hello A/all,

Well, I had an epiphany the other day. During correspondance with a Mistress I am friends with, She was ranting about a guy claiming that submission is a "gift." Suddenly, I had a revalation as if Goddess herself touched my forehead. Submission is the price of admission... Being selected is an honor... Dominance is the gift!...

If I remember correctly, 'D's" are about 10% of the population; and, "S" folks are about 35%. Right there, you can see an imbalance of sorts. For a Domme, submissives are everywhere. Finding a worthy one is no doubt a chore. Thus, Dominance is the Gift!

That being said, I still belive that I am a Peachy-Keen-Fabulously-Flat-Stomp-Down-Special-Guy!

Respectfully,
Mike
SnowRanger

_____________________________

You can't help where you were born; and, you may not have much to say about where you die; but, you can and you should try to pass the days in between as a good man.
Anton Myrer Once an Eagle

Post #: 1

RE: I Learned the Truth! - 11/10/2009 8:16:38 PM

lovingpet

Posts: 4270
Joined: 6/19/2005
Status: offline

No. I think it is the people who occupy each that are the gift. Orientation is nothing without the personality and chemistry that comes from two great for each other people.

lovingpet

_____________________________

If you put your head into more, you'd have to put your back into less. ~Me

10 Fluffy pts.

(in reply to SnowRanger)

Post #: 2

RE: I Learned the Truth! - 11/10/2009 8:16:57 PM

RedMagic1

Posts: 6470
Joined: 5/10/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: SnowRanger
Being selected is an honor

Yes. And... don't you select who you will be with? The submissive honors the dominant, just as the dominant honors the submissive. The relationship is the gift that people give themselves and each other, and they purchase that gift through damn hard work.

_____________________________

Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
- 15th century Aztec

(in reply to SnowRanger)

Post #: 3

RE: I Learned the Truth! - 11/10/2009 8:20:35 PM

Elisabella

Posts: 3939
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: RedMagic1

Yes. And... don't you select who you will be with? The submissive honors the dominant, just as the dominant honors the submissive. The relationship is the gift that people give themselves and each other, and they purchase that gift through damn hard work.

This.

(in reply to RedMagic1)

Post #: 4

RE: I Learned the Truth! - 11/10/2009 8:23:32 PM

lovingpet

Posts: 4270
Joined: 6/19/2005
Status: offline

I liked it too, Red! Thanks!

lovingpet

_____________________________

If you put your head into more, you'd have to put your back into less. ~Me

10 Fluffy pts.

(in reply to Elisabella)

Post #: 5

RE: I Learned the Truth! - 11/10/2009 8:36:47 PM

LadyPact

Posts: 32566
Status: offline

I've been saying this for some time now.

The people in My life, kinky or not, are a blessing to Me. These are 'gifts' in a sense. I receive love, compassion, friendship, positive feelings, and scores of other things I could mention here.

Yes, to Me, it is the price of admission. That price is being a human being worthy of paying the cost. I have to be a friend to make one. I have to have the capacity to love in order to be loved. I have to be the kind of PERSON that other people want in their lives if I am going to participate in that.

People tend to miss the boat on this. When they do, it doesn't bother Me a bit to leave them behind on the shore.

_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to lovingpet)

Post #: 6

RE: I Learned the Truth! - 11/10/2009 9:13:37 PM

Andalusite

Posts: 2492
Joined: 1/25/2009
Status: offline

I don't think of either Dominance or submission as a gift. I think it's perfectly reasonable to expect or need some kind of reciprocation, the opposite reaction, from the other person. Some people have "a gift" (as in a talent) for one or the other, or both. They are capable of expressing their needs, drawing those responses from their partner. They have sensitivity, wisdom, a deep understanding of their partner's needs and desires, and how to fulfill them in a way that works for both.

(in reply to LadyPact)

Post #: 7

RE: I Learned the Truth! - 11/10/2009 9:22:11 PM

LPslittleclip

Posts: 1163
Joined: 9/29/2007
Status: offline

i am a slave and my gift is being able to serve My Mistress. i did not understand the full meaning of being a submissive/slave at first but later when my Mistress explained it to me i understood what my place was that i had been searching for.

_____________________________

proud to serve the awsome
LadyPact

(in reply to Andalusite)

Post #: 8

RE: I Learned the Truth! - 11/10/2009 10:14:28 PM

fadedshadow

Posts: 751
Joined: 4/27/2009
From: a place
Status: offline

i think i'm a pretty good submissive, and a friend =D

_____________________________

your living nightmare

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Post #: 9

RE: I Learned the Truth! - 11/11/2009 3:33:12 AM

MsStarlett

Posts: 1879
Joined: 12/23/2007
Status: offline

I think I luv you Snowy.

And *smooches* Shadow. There's enough luv to go around.

---------------------

That being said...

Let's look at the definition of Top and Bottom. The Top is GIVING a sensation. The Bottom RECEIVES it. A good top doesn't 'give' anything the bottom is not willing to receive. So who's getting all the gifty's here?

And yes, there are many, many males who claim to be submissive for every female who admits to being dominant. So, that means a lot of men lining up begging a woman to give him the 'gift' of her time and attentions. Why would a man think that the 'gift' of his ass to beat is enough to catch her eye? One chunk of meat is much like another. You gotta have something else.

< Message edited by MsStarlett -- 11/11/2009 3:39:15 AM >

_____________________________

It is by caffeine alone I set my mind in motion.
It is by the beans of Java that thoughts acquire speed,
the hands acquire shakes, the shakes become a warning,
It is by caffeine alone I set my mind in motion.

(in reply to fadedshadow)

Post #: 10

RE: I Learned the Truth! - 11/11/2009 4:43:06 AM

undergroundsea

Posts: 2400
Joined: 6/27/2004
From: Austin, TX
Status: offline

I am going to play upon the submission is a gift idea for a holiday party costume. I am going to modify the dick-in-a-box idea from Saturday Night Live. I am going to wear a large box around my entire body, wrapped in holiday wrapping paper. Then I'll flash others by opening up the box and sing "sub in a box" and tell people, hey yo, submission is a gift, alright?

;-)

Cheers,

Sea

(in reply to SnowRanger)

Post #: 11

RE: I Learned the Truth! - 11/11/2009 7:02:32 AM

hardbodysub

Posts: 1654
Joined: 8/7/2005
Status: offline

Neither submission nor dominance is a gift, especially dominance. A gift is something of value given voluntarily without expectation of anything in return. D/s is transactional, not one-way.

quote:

If I remember correctly, 'D's" are about 10% of the population; and, "S" folks are about 35%. Right there, you can see an imbalance of sorts. For a Domme, submissives are everywhere. Finding a worthy one is no doubt a chore. Thus, Dominance is the Gift!

Whoa. The relative numbers of dominants and submissives clearly does not suggest that dominance is a gift to the submissive; if anything, the opposite is true. Even if you believe the numbers above, all it proves is a shortage of dominants. The result is that the "price" a submissive must pay for a dominant increases. That is quite the opposite of the concept of dominance as a gift.

I can see how some might think that their submission is a gift, because they give it freely and *think* that they don't require anything from their partner. However, what they require as compensation is dominance from their partner. So it's not really a gift. The idea of dominance as a gift is totally off base, IMO. When have you ever heard of a dominant who required nothing of a submissive, and received no service, deference, or anything from the submissive? You haven't, because the absence of those things means there is no dominance. The presence of any of those things means that dominance is not a gift.

(in reply to SnowRanger)

Post #: 12

RE: I Learned the Truth! - 11/11/2009 1:00:42 PM

howahkan

Posts: 137
Joined: 10/13/2009
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: SnowRanger

Hello A/all,

Well, I had an epiphany the other day. During correspondance with a Mistress I am friends with, She was ranting about a guy claiming that submission is a "gift." Suddenly, I had a revalation as if Goddess herself touched my forehead. Submission is the price of admission... Being selected is an honor... Dominance is the gift!...

If I remember correctly, 'D's" are about 10% of the population; and, "S" folks are about 35%. Right there, you can see an imbalance of sorts. For a Domme, submissives are everywhere. Finding a worthy one is no doubt a chore. Thus, Dominance is the Gift!

That being said, I still belive that I am a Peachy-Keen-Fabulously-Flat-Stomp-Down-Special-Guy!

Respectfully,
Mike
SnowRanger

I respect your opinion. I once believed the same myself until a friend set me straight. She told me this, "Without a bottom there is no top, without a left there is no right, without a front there is no back. Your part in any relationship is of equal value. Never let anyone diminish your value in favor of their own.". This was an epiphany for me. I had always thought of myself as less of a person because I am a masochist and a sub. Not true...

I still belive you are a Peachy-Keen-Fabulously-Flat-Stomp-Down-Special-Guy! Finding a worthy Domme is no doubt a chore. Good luck on your search...

(in reply to SnowRanger)

Post #: 13

RE: I Learned the Truth! - 11/11/2009 5:26:53 PM

LookieNoNookie

Posts: 12216
Joined: 8/9/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: SnowRanger

Hello A/all,

Well, I had an epiphany the other day. During correspondance with a Mistress I am friends with, She was ranting about a guy claiming that submission is a "gift." Suddenly, I had a revalation as if Goddess herself touched my forehead. Submission is the price of admission... Being selected is an honor... Dominance is the gift!...

If I remember correctly, 'D's" are about 10% of the population; and, "S" folks are about 35%. Right there, you can see an imbalance of sorts. For a Domme, submissives are everywhere. Finding a worthy one is no doubt a chore. Thus, Dominance is the Gift!

That being said, I still belive that I am a Peachy-Keen-Fabulously-Flat-Stomp-Down-Special-Guy!

Respectfully,
Mike
SnowRanger

I don't think your stats are accurate. (In fact, I think they're patently off).

(in reply to SnowRanger)

Post #: 14

RE: I Learned the Truth! - 11/11/2009 6:17:35 PM

SnowRanger

Posts: 503
Joined: 5/25/2008
From: Sinsinnati
Status: offline

Okay, If you say so. I seem to remember those bumbers from a D.I.S.C. seminar I attended some years back. But if you have a better set of numbers. I yield to your patent source.

(in reply to LookieNoNookie)

Post #: 15

RE: I Learned the Truth! - 11/11/2009 7:18:44 PM

Aileen1968

Posts: 6062
Joined: 12/12/2007
From: I miss Shore, New Jersey
Status: offline

We're not a gift to each other. That always sounds like a line from a bad Harlequin romance book to me. We're just a great fucking match.

_____________________________

(in reply to SnowRanger)

Post #: 16

RE: I Learned the Truth! - 11/11/2009 8:29:27 PM

dreamerdreaming

Posts: 2839
Status: offline

I wish I had a buck for every time this subject comes up on the boards, and I say this about my beloved slaveboy:

HE is the gift.

Submission is what he does. Submissive is his orientation.

He gives himself to me. All of him. Not just his actions, not just his orientation. All the rest of him, too. All that he is, he gives to me. He is the gift.

_____________________________

Download SLAVE LOVER. Explicit BDSM porn, with a plot! A love story, on a FemDom planet! http://www.amazon.com/Slave-Lover-Chronicles-Book-ebook/dp/B0031ERBLI/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1261973416&sr=1

(in reply to SnowRanger)

Post #: 17

RE: I Learned the Truth! - 11/12/2009 3:47:24 AM

hopelesslyInvo

Posts: 522
Joined: 2/10/2008
From: the future
Status: offline

i tend to think

my submission is not the gift; i am, and i only give myself for one reason. if they don't want "that", i have nothing left to offer and nothing greater to give; submission is merely the only way i know how to give it to them.

< Message edited by hopelesslyInvo -- 11/12/2009 3:49:05 AM >

_____________________________

great minds discuss ideas; average minds discuss events; small minds discuss people.

(in reply to SnowRanger)

Post #: 18

RE: I Learned the Truth! - 11/12/2009 10:53:50 AM

ElanSubdued

Posts: 1511
Status: offline

quote:

RedMagic1:
Yes. And... don't you select who you will be with? The submissive honors the dominant, just as the dominant honors the submissive. The relationship is the gift that people give themselves and each other, and they purchase that gift through damn hard work.

This.

quote:

Aileen1968:
We're not a gift to each other. That always sounds like a line from a bad Harlequin romance book to me. We're just a great fucking match.

And this.

quote:

dreamerdreaming:
I wish I had a buck for every time this subject comes up on the boards, and I say this about my beloved slaveboy: *HE is the gift.* Submission is what he does. Submissive is his orientation. He gives *himself* to me. *All* of him. Not just his actions, not just his orientation. All the rest of him, too. All that he is, he gives to me. *He* is the gift.

And this.

quote:

hopelesslyInvo:
my submission is not the gift; i am, and i only give myself for one reason. if they don't want "that", i have nothing left to offer and nothing greater to give; submission is merely the only way i know how to give it to them.

And this too, most definitely... with an addition. Submission is one way I share and give. Sometimes this might be enjoying mutual pleasure with my domme and other times it's just doing things (tasks, pleasures, etc.) for her, whether I enjoy them or not. There are many other ways a domme and I share and give to each other. Much of these have little to do with BDSM, but there are times BDSM works as a lubricant for communication and in clarifying responsibilities.

Elan.

(in reply to SnowRanger)

Post #: 19

RE: I Learned the Truth! - 11/12/2009 11:01:57 AM

LaTigresse

Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline

You know the secret, now you must be keeeeeeeeled!

_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to SnowRanger)

Post #: 20

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