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Aynne88 -> RE: I Admit It I........ (1/12/2010 8:45:35 PM)
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I admit I am so upset with my ex-husband I can't even believe it. This is probably too private to post here but I have to get it out so bear with me please?
I have lupus, I have said that in the past, and the son of a bitch canceled our health insurance and didn't even tell me, I found out via a letter from Anthem.
So, my Sir put me on his companies asap, and not only that but he also paid "our" meaning mine and the ex's property tax because it has been a horrible year financially in our business, the ex and I, high end custom home building, and I can't even tell him because Sir said not to, and I fucking hate that the ex and I still share a home oh believe me as total non sexual fighting roommates for probably another month or so even though Sir rented me a gorgeous oceanfront apartment but his wife is on death's door from her 3rd bought with ovarian cancer and I do not want him to leave her now and he wouldn't anyway, no matter how much he may want to, and could certainly afford 24/7 care, because I wouldn't respect that decision and eventually he would regret it too, sometimes you have to do the right thing even if she has no idea what is going on, he knows and has an obligation to her. They, nor I, have any children, thankfully, but it still sucks. She married him for his money, but nonetheless, she is still a human being and needs him now and this is such a wierd situation.
He (Sir) also bought me a brand new vehicle so I don't have to deal with the ex or fight over things we acquired together, because let's face it, sometimes you just need to go and not worry about the "stuff." The ex has no idea either because even though he is a bastard, it isn't in me to throw this in his face, he just thinks that John is my good friend and employer, which he is really, the rest will have to wait until the proper time. He thinks the vehicle is a company one and that is that.
I admit that having one of the other of us every day saying "fuck it let's just be together" is getting to me, and being adult about it all is so hard, and waiting for someone to die is so reprehensible that I hate even thinking of the karma of that.
I admit that she really before even getting sick was a bitch, I have known her for 25 years, but that is neither here nor there and I hope some of this makes sense, and I don't sound cold, because I hope she lives another 30 years and he can just leave her without guilt and not because she died. Does that make any sense?
I admit I wish I didn't write this but I am not even going to reread or edit it, I had to let it out. Thanks.
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