Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

Effects of ds


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> Effects of ds Page: [1] 2   next >   >>
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
Effects of ds - 10/17/2009 5:01:16 PM   
Missokyst


Posts: 6041
Joined: 9/9/2006
Status: offline 		This morning I woke up ... languid, l guess is the best description.

I rarely play these days, and even rarer do I get to reach that zone of peacefulness that happens when I hit subspace. One of the restrictions I have placed within play is not allowing any genital sexual contact on my person. Playing to be flogged, spanked, whipped is perfectly ok, and if someone wants to take care of their own business later, cool. Casual play rarely results in me wanting more than venting a masochistic urge. And I cannot recall a time when playing casually that I felt a need for sex afterward.

This morning though.. I am languid. I indulged in some non genital play yesterday afternoon which not only sent me into subspace, it continues today to make me feel soft and gentle, even in these evening hours. Subspace does that to me. It makes me feel relaxed, happy and at peace when so much of my life always feels like I am on the edge of a cliff. My voice is softer, my walk is slower and more liquid and my eyes which are quite round and bulbous seem to have dropped into a sloe-eyed appearance. Even the meal I chose to make today was a long simmering, carefully seasoned, very hearty stew, not the usual quickly made dinner I might normally prepare.

Looking back over my life this reaction is the best way for me to describe my reaction to being sub. It makes me feel calm. I am not the tense, egg-shell walking woman I tend to be in regular life. The only control I need right now is making sure my stew is perfection. The need to appear to be on top of things has lost its urgency.

This is my reaction to being sub, which I had forgotten until today. Or maybe not forgotten, but put aside so I do not feel its loss.

What is your reaction to venting your sub or dom side? Do you feel or see a change when you have played? What are the results on your regular life?




< Message edited by Missokyst -- 10/17/2009 5:02:50 PM >
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Effects of ds - 10/17/2009 5:22:49 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		I'm calmer when we play every couple of weeks. If it's longer than that, I do start to get itchy. And bitchy the way I would if I had hives that were itching and irritating me. Unfortunately we didn't get much playtime over the summer with all the kids home from college. We never had a day where the house was empty.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


(in reply to Missokyst)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Effects of ds - 10/17/2009 6:43:02 PM   
Missokyst


Posts: 6041
Joined: 9/9/2006
Status: offline 		Boy can I relate to that. I have to bribe people to leave me alone for the day.


quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP
we didn't get much playtime over the summer with all the kids home from college. We never had a day where the house was empty.


(in reply to DesFIP)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Effects of ds - 10/17/2009 7:04:57 PM   
Surrenderwithin


Posts: 368
Joined: 10/8/2006
Status: offline 		I am a little unclear. Are you asking about SM or DS? My answer varies based upon this.

Thank you,
Maggi

0 total NZ points but working on that.

(in reply to Missokyst)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Effects of ds - 10/17/2009 7:25:25 PM   
AcademyForSlaves


Posts: 712
Joined: 2/24/2006
Status: offline 		Hi.

After I dominate my sub (I'm always doing that. LOL) I feel like I'm really being me. And so when I'm bored from daily routine in the REAL world (if you can call it that) I grab my sub by the collar and do what makes me feel great. It brings me back to being the real me and confirms that it's what I really want to be doing. Anyone ever see the movies Metropolis or 1984?

_____________________________

Academy Mistresses
http://www.academyforslaves.com/home.html

(in reply to Surrenderwithin)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Effects of ds - 10/17/2009 8:14:32 PM   
Missokyst


Posts: 6041
Joined: 9/9/2006
Status: offline 		Either, Or actually. I am both submissive and masochistic. Each one works without the other, but in conjuntion they are a powerful force. He is both dominant and sadistic which also work independently or together.


< Message edited by Missokyst -- 10/17/2009 8:16:12 PM >

(in reply to Surrenderwithin)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Effects of ds - 10/17/2009 11:48:43 PM   
bluefireeyez


Posts: 119
Joined: 12/15/2008
Status: offline 		i usually have the very unpleasant (to me) responsibility of not only taking care of myself and my clients but also dealing with several family issues. Even though i write everything down...literally, i still worry that i might have forgotten some thing and go over the "to-do" list in my head 50 thousand times.

When i get the chance to play, i know that He is there, in control, and looking out for my safety. i tend to get extremely calm and a fuzzy mind. my mind shuts everything out and focuses on what is happening. Afterwards (once my brain turns on again), i am usually much calmer and have very good focus. It seems like i am more productive too.

(in reply to Missokyst)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Effects of ds - 10/18/2009 12:35:33 AM   
Justme696


Posts: 3236
Joined: 1/7/2008
From: Royal kingdom of the Netherlands
Status: offline 		OP
I don't play or do sessions...I only had Ds relations with people I love.
So for me it is hard to say if the good feeling was caused by them or the bdsm activities.
I can feel as relaxed with some persons in a vanilla setting.

(in reply to bluefireeyez)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Effects of ds - 10/18/2009 4:25:36 AM   
allthatjaz


Posts: 2878
Joined: 8/20/2008
Status: offline 		I am not going to say I have a particularly submissive side to me but there is a constant D/s side to Stephen in that his expectations of me are high and he doesn't tolerate mood swings or inconsistencies. I look back at how I was before I met him. I was up and down like a bloody yoyo and I could be a mouthy bitch too. I am all together calmer, more patient, more caring and generally so much more relaxed than I think I have ever been before.
I would say the D/s energizes me in a very subtle way.

_____________________________

S&M (Steve and Maria) persona libre de convencionalismos


Fan of edgeplay.co.uk

(in reply to Justme696)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Effects of ds - 10/18/2009 7:00:23 AM   
sblady


Posts: 433
Joined: 9/28/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

I'm calmer when we play every couple of weeks. If it's longer than that, I do start to get itchy. And bitchy.


This is such an accurate description of what I go through. It's amazing how calm, patient and kind I am after being "roughed up".

_____________________________

Open your arms to change, but don't let go of your values. Dalai Lama





(in reply to DesFIP)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Effects of ds - 10/18/2009 7:07:39 AM   
sblady


Posts: 433
Joined: 9/28/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Justme696

OP
I don't play or do sessions...I only had Ds relations with people I love.
So for me it is hard to say if the good feeling was caused by them or the bdsm activities.
I can feel as relaxed with some persons in a vanilla setting.



Cmon...you know there's nothing more relaxing than the after affects of good, rough D/s "relations".


_____________________________

Open your arms to change, but don't let go of your values. Dalai Lama





(in reply to Justme696)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Effects of ds - 10/18/2009 7:09:48 AM   
firmlove


Posts: 26
Joined: 5/5/2007
Status: offline 		personally for me one of the best things about D/s is that it cures my panic attacks.  No idea why or how but it does work.

(in reply to sblady)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Effects of ds - 10/18/2009 7:11:39 AM   
zephyroftheNorth


Posts: 8159
Joined: 10/5/2009
From: The Great Frozen North
Status: offline 		A good play session tends to leave me energized and ready to take on the world. It becomes virtually impossible to sleep which is why my preference is to play on the weekend when I at least don't have to get up and go to work the next day.

Damn this just brought to mind how long it's been since the last time I played with someone *sighs*


_____________________________

And there's a smile when the pain comes
The pain gonna make ev'rything alright ~ Black Crows

Team Troll Trollop
Member: Cocksuckers For World Peace
Charter member: Lance's Fag Hags
Member: Subbie Mafia
Member: Hibbie's Hotties

(in reply to Missokyst)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Effects of ds - 10/18/2009 7:15:11 AM   
ghitaPVH


Posts: 1363
Joined: 11/14/2007
Status: offline 		It does me too, firmlove. It also makes me more cheerful, I guess is the way to describe it. If things have been rough at home or work for a few weeks, and I start to get moody or depressed, Sir knows all he has to do it tie me down and beat me and Im once again my happy go lucky self. I start getting housework done again, I become more sociable again....I stop crying at credit card commercials......


_____________________________

Don't expect anything of me and I promise I'll never disappoint you.

"The true man wants two things: danger and play. For that reason he wants woman, as the most dangerous plaything. --Nietzsche"

(in reply to firmlove)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Effects of ds - 10/18/2009 7:38:19 AM   
porcelaine


Posts: 5020
Joined: 7/24/2006
Status: offline 		i don't engage in casual play. i'd have to entertain notions that are truly nuances for me. i play with my partner only unless my Owner specifically states otherwise. since i prefer edgier things without the benefit of safety words and all that other stuff it is better for me to keep myself in familiar hands.

porcelaine


_____________________________

His will; my fate.

(in reply to ghitaPVH)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Effects of ds - 10/18/2009 7:41:31 AM   
LPslittleclip


Posts: 1163
Joined: 9/29/2007
Status: offline 		i very much enjoy play time but i have adhd so i don't stay in space for long, but it does help me focus and am more calm afterwords. my Mistress on the other hand can be floating for days after so i enjoy Her space time more than mine.

(in reply to ghitaPVH)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Effects of ds - 10/18/2009 9:37:06 AM   
Missokyst


Posts: 6041
Joined: 9/9/2006
Status: offline 		I have considered that I might have ADHD or something similar since I tend to be one of those people that starts in one direction, sees something and veers off that way. But since I always finish what I start for me this "problem" only leads to getting more done. Someone up above mentioned focus... and that is what happens to me. Instead of focusing on things that go here and there I have an almost pinpoint focus on the person in front of me, so that nothing else matters.

(in reply to LPslittleclip)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Effects of ds - 10/18/2009 9:43:43 AM   
sweetsub1957


Posts: 2201
Joined: 4/28/2009
Status: offline 		~Fast Reply~
I don't  do casual play.  But after a D/s session with Sir, I would feel so relaxed and peaceful, yet ready to face anything, all at the same time.  There's just something special about it.  :)

_____________________________

Member: Lance's Fag Hags.

"That's not just a chip on her shoulder, that's the whole potato!" ~Lady Angelika~

In lowering yourself to talking behind my back, you're perfectly positioned to kiss my ass.

An it harm none, do what ye wilt.

(in reply to Missokyst)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Effects of ds - 10/18/2009 10:23:30 AM   
AlexandraLynch


Posts: 778
Joined: 3/24/2008
Status: offline 		That hyperfocusing is also an ADD symptom. We can't do normal focus; it's either the "as I was saying....oh, look, a duck!" sort of thing, or it's the sort of thing where the house could burn down around you and you wouldn't notice. It's not that either is a totally useless state, but neither is the sort of thing you want solely in your arsenal. 

_____________________________

I use fastreply. Don't take offence where none is meant.

Just because I'm not a bitch doesn't mean I'm not perfectly capable of making sure you'll be very sorry if you disobey.

(in reply to Missokyst)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Effects of ds - 10/18/2009 10:42:53 AM   
Toppingfrmbottom


Posts: 6528
Joined: 6/7/2009
Status: offline 		Please don't speak for everyone. I am ADHD and I can focus normally a lot of the time. Now it's true I CAN be easily distracted And I do have those moments where it's like as I was saying, OH LOOK SOMETHING ELSE! And it's true sometimes if something interests me I will focus and obsess till I am worn out and if the subject doesn't hold any interest for me, I will struggle to pay attention, and that is hardest in my schooling, because there's a lot of boring shit one has to wade through.

Anyway the point is, that the symptoms of ADD  it's not going to manifest itself the same for all ADD'ers. 
quote:

ORIGINAL: AlexandraLynch

That hyperfocusing is also an ADD symptom. We can't do normal focus; it's either the "as I was saying....oh, look, a duck!" sort of thing, or it's the sort of thing where the house could burn down around you and you wouldn't notice. It's not that either is a totally useless state, but neither is the sort of thing you want solely in your arsenal. 

(in reply to AlexandraLynch)
Profile   Post #: 20
Page:   [1] 2   next >   >>
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> Effects of ds Page: [1] 2   next >   >>
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.078