Effects of ds

Effects of ds (Full Version)

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Missokyst -> Effects of ds (10/17/2009 5:01:16 PM)
This morning I woke up ... languid, l guess is the best description. I rarely play these days, and even rarer do I get to reach that zone of peacefulness that happens when I hit subspace. One of the restrictions I have placed within play is not allowing any genital sexual contact on my person. Playing to be flogged, spanked, whipped is perfectly ok, and if someone wants to take care of their own business later, cool. Casual play rarely results in me wanting more than venting a masochistic urge. And I cannot recall a time when playing casually that I felt a need for sex afterward. This morning though.. I am languid. I indulged in some non genital play yesterday afternoon which not only sent me into subspace, it continues today to make me feel soft and gentle, even in these evening hours. Subspace does that to me. It makes me feel relaxed, happy and at peace when so much of my life always feels like I am on the edge of a cliff. My voice is softer, my walk is slower and more liquid and my eyes which are quite round and bulbous seem to have dropped into a sloe-eyed appearance. Even the meal I chose to make today was a long simmering, carefully seasoned, very hearty stew, not the usual quickly made dinner I might normally prepare. Looking back over my life this reaction is the best way for me to describe my reaction to being sub. It makes me feel calm. I am not the tense, egg-shell walking woman I tend to be in regular life. The only control I need right now is making sure my stew is perfection. The need to appear to be on top of things has lost its urgency. This is my reaction to being sub, which I had forgotten until today. Or maybe not forgotten, but put aside so I do not feel its loss. What is your reaction to venting your sub or dom side? Do you feel or see a change when you have played? What are the results on your regular life?

DesFIP -> RE: Effects of ds (10/17/2009 5:22:49 PM)
I'm calmer when we play every couple of weeks. If it's longer than that, I do start to get itchy. And bitchy the way I would if I had hives that were itching and irritating me. Unfortunately we didn't get much playtime over the summer with all the kids home from college. We never had a day where the house was empty.

Missokyst -> RE: Effects of ds (10/17/2009 6:43:02 PM)
Boy can I relate to that. I have to bribe people to leave me alone for the day. quote: ORIGINAL: DesFIP we didn't get much playtime over the summer with all the kids home from college. We never had a day where the house was empty.

Surrenderwithin -> RE: Effects of ds (10/17/2009 7:04:57 PM)
I am a little unclear. Are you asking about SM or DS? My answer varies based upon this. Thank you, Maggi 0 total NZ points but working on that.

AcademyForSlaves -> RE: Effects of ds (10/17/2009 7:25:25 PM)
Hi. After I dominate my sub (I'm always doing that. LOL) I feel like I'm really being me. And so when I'm bored from daily routine in the REAL world (if you can call it that) I grab my sub by the collar and do what makes me feel great. It brings me back to being the real me and confirms that it's what I really want to be doing. Anyone ever see the movies Metropolis or 1984?

Missokyst -> RE: Effects of ds (10/17/2009 8:14:32 PM)
Either, Or actually. I am both submissive and masochistic. Each one works without the other, but in conjuntion they are a powerful force. He is both dominant and sadistic which also work independently or together.

bluefireeyez -> RE: Effects of ds (10/17/2009 11:48:43 PM)
i usually have the very unpleasant (to me) responsibility of not only taking care of myself and my clients but also dealing with several family issues. Even though i write everything down...literally, i still worry that i might have forgotten some thing and go over the "to-do" list in my head 50 thousand times. When i get the chance to play, i know that He is there, in control, and looking out for my safety. i tend to get extremely calm and a fuzzy mind. my mind shuts everything out and focuses on what is happening. Afterwards (once my brain turns on again), i am usually much calmer and have very good focus. It seems like i am more productive too.

Justme696 -> RE: Effects of ds (10/18/2009 12:35:33 AM)
OP I don't play or do sessions...I only had Ds relations with people I love. So for me it is hard to say if the good feeling was caused by them or the bdsm activities. I can feel as relaxed with some persons in a vanilla setting.

allthatjaz -> RE: Effects of ds (10/18/2009 4:25:36 AM)
I am not going to say I have a particularly submissive side to me but there is a constant D/s side to Stephen in that his expectations of me are high and he doesn't tolerate mood swings or inconsistencies. I look back at how I was before I met him. I was up and down like a bloody yoyo and I could be a mouthy bitch too. I am all together calmer, more patient, more caring and generally so much more relaxed than I think I have ever been before. I would say the D/s energizes me in a very subtle way.

sblady -> RE: Effects of ds (10/18/2009 7:00:23 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: DesFIP I'm calmer when we play every couple of weeks. If it's longer than that, I do start to get itchy. And bitchy. This is such an accurate description of what I go through. It's amazing how calm, patient and kind I am after being "roughed up". [:D]

sblady -> RE: Effects of ds (10/18/2009 7:07:39 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Justme696 OP I don't play or do sessions...I only had Ds relations with people I love. So for me it is hard to say if the good feeling was caused by them or the bdsm activities. I can feel as relaxed with some persons in a vanilla setting. Cmon...you know there's nothing more relaxing than the after affects of good, rough D/s "relations". [:)] [sm=couch.gif]

firmlove -> RE: Effects of ds (10/18/2009 7:09:48 AM)
personally for me one of the best things about D/s is that it cures my panic attacks. No idea why or how but it does work.

zephyroftheNorth -> RE: Effects of ds (10/18/2009 7:11:39 AM)
A good play session tends to leave me energized and ready to take on the world. It becomes virtually impossible to sleep which is why my preference is to play on the weekend when I at least don't have to get up and go to work the next day. Damn this just brought to mind how long it's been since the last time I played with someone sighs

ghitaPVH -> RE: Effects of ds (10/18/2009 7:15:11 AM)
It does me too, firmlove. It also makes me more cheerful, I guess is the way to describe it. If things have been rough at home or work for a few weeks, and I start to get moody or depressed, Sir knows all he has to do it tie me down and beat me and Im once again my happy go lucky self. I start getting housework done again, I become more sociable again....I stop crying at credit card commercials......

porcelaine -> RE: Effects of ds (10/18/2009 7:38:19 AM)
i don't engage in casual play. i'd have to entertain notions that are truly nuances for me. i play with my partner only unless my Owner specifically states otherwise. since i prefer edgier things without the benefit of safety words and all that other stuff it is better for me to keep myself in familiar hands. porcelaine

LPslittleclip -> RE: Effects of ds (10/18/2009 7:41:31 AM)
i very much enjoy play time but i have adhd so i don't stay in space for long, but it does help me focus and am more calm afterwords. my Mistress on the other hand can be floating for days after so i enjoy Her space time more than mine.

Missokyst -> RE: Effects of ds (10/18/2009 9:37:06 AM)
I have considered that I might have ADHD or something similar since I tend to be one of those people that starts in one direction, sees something and veers off that way. But since I always finish what I start for me this "problem" only leads to getting more done. Someone up above mentioned focus... and that is what happens to me. Instead of focusing on things that go here and there I have an almost pinpoint focus on the person in front of me, so that nothing else matters.

sweetsub1957 -> RE: Effects of ds (10/18/2009 9:43:43 AM)
~Fast Reply~ I don't do casual play. But after a D/s session with Sir, I would feel so relaxed and peaceful, yet ready to face anything, all at the same time. There's just something special about it. :)

AlexandraLynch -> RE: Effects of ds (10/18/2009 10:23:30 AM)
That hyperfocusing is also an ADD symptom. We can't do normal focus; it's either the "as I was saying....oh, look, a duck!" sort of thing, or it's the sort of thing where the house could burn down around you and you wouldn't notice. It's not that either is a totally useless state, but neither is the sort of thing you want solely in your arsenal.

Toppingfrmbottom -> RE: Effects of ds (10/18/2009 10:42:53 AM)
Please don't speak for everyone. I am ADHD and I can focus normally a lot of the time. Now it's true I CAN be easily distracted And I do have those moments where it's like as I was saying, OH LOOK SOMETHING ELSE! And it's true sometimes if something interests me I will focus and obsess till I am worn out and if the subject doesn't hold any interest for me, I will struggle to pay attention, and that is hardest in my schooling, because there's a lot of boring shit one has to wade through. Anyway the point is, that the symptoms of ADD it's not going to manifest itself the same for all ADD'ers. quote: ORIGINAL: AlexandraLynch That hyperfocusing is also an ADD symptom. We can't do normal focus; it's either the "as I was saying....oh, look, a duck!" sort of thing, or it's the sort of thing where the house could burn down around you and you wouldn't notice. It's not that either is a totally useless state, but neither is the sort of thing you want solely in your arsenal.

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