mixielicous
Posts: 1283
Joined: 4/6/2006
From: Boston area, Massachusetts
Status: offline
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I dont know, I just got this crazy long msg.... Well, its good for a laugh!
Thats a lot of references
Lordy thats a long one!
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Consider this a kind and random act of sharing and kindness
because someone does care about you not being mislead because
of a lack of knowledgeable resources. Keep in mind I have no clue if you need this or not. Just sharing that is all. I am not trying to get or expecting a reply.
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Words to always think about just before you make a choice.
This saying works for nuclear disarmament's as well as letting a
man or woman control you.
Trust but Verify. I would not expect you to blindly trust me.
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~~ Be careful who you bare your soul to. Too few will honor the gift, even fewer will know the value of it's worth. ~~
Your Word
When one gives an assurance or promise or makes a sworn intention, one must make it come true. If one says he or she is going to do something, he or she should do it.
If he or she says he or she is not going to do something he or she should not do it. People who keep their word are trusted and admired. People who do not are regarded like garbage. Those who break their word often never get another chance.
Live by what you think, not by what you've been told.
It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it (Aristotle)
The meeting of two personalities is like the contact of two chemical substances: if there is any reaction, both are transformed.~Carl Jung~
Red Flags: 1) Tries to separate you from your friends, family or BDSM community?
2) Avoids talking about personal details.Gets mad when you ask or quickly ends the conversation or answers questions with questions.
3) Has no BDSM references or friends you can talk to.
4) Gets angry when you ask for references or ask around about them.
5) Is inconsistent with details about themselves.6)Does not give you their home and work phone number at the appropriate time. 7)Only communicates with you at strange hours and gets mad if you try to contact them at other times.8)Criticizes the BDSM community and refuses to participate, especially if they never were part of it. 9)Consistently breaks promises. 10)Always finds excuses for not meeting. 11)Always puts blame on others for things going wrong. 12)Does not take personal responsibility. 13)Has bad relationships with most or all of their family members. 14)Pressures you into doing things you do not want to do. 15)Does not respect your limits, negotiations or contracts.16)Pushes you into a D/s relationship too fast. 17) Falls in love with you way too fast and swears undying love before even meeting you. 18)Hides behind their D/s authority and says that their authority should not be questioned.19)Tries to make you feel guilty for not being good enough. Says that you are not a True sub. 20)Loses control of their emotions in arguments and regresses to yelling, name-calling and blame. 21)Puts you down in front of other people. 22)Turns instantly on their friends, going from best friend to arch enemy at the drop of a hat. 23)Treats you lovingly and respectfully one day and then harshly and accusingly the next. 24)Goes to great lengths to get revenge on people.25)Lies or withholds information. Cheats on you or is overly jealous. 26)Will not discuss what your possible future relationship could be like. 27)Tries to keep you in the dark about what might happen next in the relationship. 28)Does not respect your feelings, rights, or opinions. 29)Belittles your ideas.30)Blames you for your hurt feelings. 31) Abuses alcohol or other drugs. 32) Is constantly asking for large amounts of money from you or others.33) Threatens suicide or other forms of self-harm. 34)Deliberately saying or doing things that result in getting themselves seriously hurt.35)Monitors your communications (emails, phone calls, chats) with others.36)Only interacts with you in a kinky or sexual manner as if role-playing. 37)Will not have normal everyday vanilla conversations. 38)Never shows you their human side. Is emotionless. Hides their vulnerability behind their D/s role.39)Has multiple on line identities for interacting with the same communities. 40)Disappears from communication for days or weeks at a time without explanation. 41)Is rude to public servants such as waitresses, cashiers and janitors. 42)Never says thank you, excuse me or I am sorry to anyone.
You should have control of yourself, if you don't have that, you should not give up any level of control.
The Dom/Master should respect you, if he does not then, it won't last long.
Both must be honest, trust can not be built without it.
Please consider the sources of each website and that this is the Internet
.
Draw your own well informed conclusions about YOU !
Ready set Go...
www.submissiveloving.com
Basic Terms
http://houseofthenobleheart.com/faqs_about_bdsm.htm
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Heck even a dictionary ***
http://uk.geocities.com/armands_child/help/dictionary.htm
Other ways to just be you
www.humbledfemales.com
www.takeninhand.com
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24/7 discussion:
http://www.albanypowerexchange.com/TPE/24_7_reality.htm
Ageplay
http://www.leathernroses.com/generalbdsm/missyageplay.htm
ANTI-GOR:
http://www.disinfo.com/archive/pages/dossier/id432/pg1/
Nice Guy Dom:
http://www.xeromag.com/fvbdniceguy.html
Contract sample:
http://www.dungeonmagic.com/pages/contract4.html
Daddy Dom some references:
http://www.vanilla-not.com/basics/daddydom.html
http://www.domsubfriends.com/voye/articles/110/
http://www.londonfetishscene.com/wipi/index.php/Daddy_Dom
Reading libraries:
http://erotic-bdsm.net/
click on reading room top right
http://www.sexuality.org/l/bdsm/index.html
Some possilbe truths of BDSM:
http://www.bdsmrealm.net/modules.php?name=Magazine&file=article&sid=41
http://www.sensuoussadie.com/articles/virgoasthetics.htm
http://www.xeromag.com/fvbdsm.html
wikipedia Defines or attempts to define:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Domination_and_submission_(BDSM)
Test them
http://www.iron-rose.com/IR/docs/acidtest.htm
http://www.iron-rose.com/IR/docs/responsibilities_of_a_dominant.htm
Myths Explored
http://www.fetishexchange.org/stigma.shtml
Variety of topics:
www.castlerealm.com
http://www.clitical.com/female-masturbation/index.php
http://www.lovingdd.blogspot.com/
www.gloria-brame.com
www.bdsmforall.com
www.bdsmlist.com
www.cuffs.com
http://www.asubmissivesjourney.com/index.html
http://www.evilmonk.org/A/menu.cfm
http://latches.beautyscastle.com/
http://www.xupstart.com/megapig/index.html
http://www.thebrc.net/articles/indexes/basics.shtml
http://www.subspace.cc/Home.html
http://www.subnation.org/
http://www.geocities.com/midnite_angel1/index.html
http://www.tiedmoments.com/submission/submission.htm
http://www.boundandproud.com/beginners.htm
http://www.steel-door.com/
http://willow.bdsmweb.net/theloveofone_mainmenu.html
http://www.io.com/~ambrosio/gen/slvneed.html
www.domsub.info
http://www.wizdomme.com/
http://www.enslavement.org.uk/essays.html
http://www.geocities.com/master_decadent2002/newbie.html
http://www.ds-arts.com/RopeArt/mainrope.html
http://www.nawashi.com/main.html
www.ottawabdsm.com
www.sirkelly.com
www.slavefarm.com
http://www.dungeonmagic.com/pages/contract4.html
http://www.frugaldomme.com/esoteric/techni12.htm
http://www.nawashi.com/main.html
http://www.bcwsd.com/backroom/library/articles_us/slavepos.shtml
http://www.geocities.com/meash47/sneakyandnice.html
http://www.dmsrealm.com/topics/protect.html
http://www.iron-rose.com/IR/docs/acidtest.htm
Videos for learning more
NOT PORN
Ways for Men to Have Multiple Orgasms (Part 1 of 2)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9ZogOjKdV7Y&feature=channel
Part 3 G spot
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j6PwGcf7daI&feature=channel
Part 1 BDSM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nIvJDOUrm1s&feature=channel
Part 2 BDSM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EeidIZvh7zg&feature=channel
Part 3
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jDPr1vwIuG8&feature=related
Part 4
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0RU0rwLwVpY&feature=channel
Part 5 BDSM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_8LZt8GwKi4&feature=related
Part 6 BDSM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a8-ERd7REWs&feature=channel
gear
http://www.dungeonware.com/index.pl
Hear my cry, In my hungering search for you, Taste my breath on the wind,
See the sky as it mirrors my colours,hints and whispers begin.
I am living to nourish you, cherish you,
I am pulsing the blood in your veins,
Feel the magic and power of surrender to life.
A Man who displays sensitivity will be a Master who is sensitive to you.
A Man who displays humility will be a Master who will show you respect.
A Man who is not afraid to cry will be a Master who understands your tears.
A Man who is quiet will be a Master who will hear your quietest whisper,
A Man who knows fear will be a Master who will not leave you to face yours alone.
A Man who will listen to a child will be a Master who will always work to understand your words.
A Man who can stand alone will be a Master who will not crush you under His weight.
A Man who controls Himself with ease will be a Master with the ability to control you in the same way.
A Man who does not have to prove His point will be a Master with many worthwhile points to share.
A Man who never makes demands will be a Master who treasures anything you give.
A Man who doesn't run after you will be a Master you will never need to run away from.
A Man who is calm will be a Master who can weather your storms.
A Man who has walked the path to peace will be a Master able to guide you along that path.
A Man who does not shout will be a Master who will never deafen you.
A Man who knows Himself will be a Master who will have time to know you.
A Man with an open mind will be a Master who never stops learning.
A Man who never stops learning will be a Master who never stops growing.
A Man who always seeks to be the best He can be for you is the only Man truly worthy of being called your Master.
A Person who displays sensitivity will be a Man who is sensitive to you.
A Person who displays humility will be a Man who will show you respect.
A Person who is not afraid to cry will be a Man who understands your tears.
A Person who is quiet will be a Man who will hear your quietest whisper,
A Person who knows fear will be a Man who will not leave you to face yours alone.
A Person who will listen to a child will be a Man who will always work to understand your words.
A Person who can stand alone will be a Man who will not crush you under His weight.
A Person who controls Himself with ease will be a Man with the ability to control you in the same way.
A Person who does not have to prove His point will be a Man with many worthwhile points to share.
A Person who never makes demands will be a Man who treasures anything you give.
A Person who doesn't run after you will be a Man you will never need to run away from.
A Person who is calm will be a Man who can weather your storms.
A Person who has walked the path to peace will be a Man able to guide you along that path.
A Person who does not shout will be a Man who will never deafen you.
A Person who knows Himself will be a Man who will have time to know you.
A Person with an open mind will be a Man who never stops learning.
A Person who never stops learning will be a Man who never stops growing.
A Person who always seeks to be the best He can be for you is the only Man truly worthy of being called your Man.
1. The healthy submissive is capable of, and thrives on, intense, intimate, emotionally open relationships. This is often evident in the number of nourishing, sustaining, and life affirming friendships she makes over the years.
2. The healthy submissive is a giver. She often needs help to ration herself because her impulses nearly always lead her to want to do good for others.
3. The healthy submissive is capable of intense joy, especially in the context of a sustaining relationship.
4. The healthy submissive finds significant relaxation when properly related. She is at ease in that place.
5. The healthy submissive has finely tuned interpersonal sensitivity. She is reactive to subtle shifts in the emotional tone of others.
6. The healthy submissive has a fluidity of self, a flexibility that enables her to adapt to changing circumstances.
7. The healthy submissive is playful.
8. The healthy submissive has no more than the usual cultural conflicts about her body, and its goodness and beauty.
9. The healthy submissive takes pride in her accomplishments.
10. The healthy submissive accepts herself as she is, knowing that while her culture values independence and self sufficiency, she has strong dependency needs and that there is no inherent wrongness about those needs.
11. The healthy submissive seeks nourishing relationships.
12. The healthy submissive, in accepting herself as is is tolerant of others. But neither will she allow anyone to tell her what her truth should be.
13. The healthy submissive has a reasonable self concept, aware of her difficulties as well as her strengths.
14. The healthy submissive hunger is to be the object of an intense and penetrating understanding. When her nature is understood and she is held in a loving and firm frame, her devotion is almost limitless. The healthy submissive has an enormous capacity for devotion, from which springs her service.
There is a voice that cries deep within my soul. It is the voice of a slave.
Take me to you, imprison me, for I, except you enthrall me, never shall be free, nor ever chaste, except you ravish me.
I do not want to be the leader. I refuse to be the leader. I want to live darkly and richly in my femaleness. I want a man lying over me, always over me. His will, his pleasure, his desire, his life, his work, his sexuality the touchstone, the command, my pivot. I don’t mind working, holding my ground intellectually, artistically; but as a woman, oh, God, as a woman I want to be dominated. I don’t mind being told to stand on my own feet, not to cling, be all that I am capable of doing, but I am going to be pursued, fucked, possessed by the will of a male at his time, his bidding.” Anais Nin
(subs voice here)
I with a deeper instinct, choose a man who compels my strength, who makes enormous demands on me, who does not doubt my courage or my toughness, who does not believe me naive or innocent, who has the courage to treat me like a woman. Anais Nin
< Message edited by mixielicous -- 8/29/2009 9:55:49 PM >
_____________________________
"lets just say he's a few prawns short of a galaxy"
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