Is God a Democrat or a Republican? (Full Version)

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SpinnerofTales -> Is God a Democrat or a Republican? (8/25/2009 9:22:43 PM)

(This thread is started with tongue firmly in cheek)

In reading the bible, one has to wonder if God is a democrat or a republican. For example:

God fed the children of isreal with mana from the heavens (a social welfare program....democrat)
God took a firm stand against gay rights (republican)
God stood for strong law enforcement and harsh penalties in the old testament (repbulican)
God changed the laws in favor of forgiveness and reconcilliation in the new testament (democrat)

of course, God also commanded that 10% of everything be given to him, a high tax policy (both democrat and republican)

So...what can you come up with.....democrat or republican and why?




Rule -> RE: Is God a Democrat or a Republican? (8/25/2009 9:29:51 PM)

I will ask the god of the Jews the next time I see one of his avatars (in about three weeks). Of course half of his avatars are likely to give a different answer.

As for the Creator and the Divine: they are indifferent.



ThatDamnedPanda -> RE: Is God a Democrat or a Republican? (8/25/2009 9:34:40 PM)

It seems simple. The Old Testament god was clearly a firebreathing young republican; but as he matured, he mellowed, and the New Testament god was a democrat.



Angevil -> RE: Is God a Democrat or a Republican? (9/11/2009 11:00:55 AM)

God doesnt care about polotics DONT YOU KNOW THAT.



GreedyTop -> RE: Is God a Democrat or a Republican? (9/11/2009 11:15:45 AM)

God is a libertarian.  



a100010001000 -> RE: Is God a Democrat or a Republican? (9/11/2009 11:18:01 AM)

God is a totalitarian dictator.

Nothing wrong with that, either.

The Old Testament God Jehovah is the New Testament Jesus.  He is also known as Michael.

He came as Jesus to be pushed around and give his life as a ransom for Adam.  Had they known who he was they would not have crucified Him and He could not have paid that ransom for sin.

This is not common knowledge yet, and they certainly do not teach this in the fake churches. Nor do they teach the idea that BDSM is fully acceptable to God.  The problem is male on male.  Female on female is hot.  3 ways are also good...2 females and  1 male.  But, most of you already know this.  www.sexinchrist.com



sunshinemiss -> RE: Is God a Democrat or a Republican? (9/11/2009 12:30:55 PM)

God's a fashion diva.

Clearly states one ought not wear wool and cotton together.

Silly goose.



hizgeorgiapeach -> RE: Is God a Democrat or a Republican? (9/11/2009 3:01:27 PM)

She's a Libertarian with a wickedly warped sense of humor......



DesFIP -> RE: Is God a Democrat or a Republican? (9/11/2009 3:14:27 PM)

At no point does the Old Testamount say that gay orientation is wrong. Onan is not against masturbation either but about the theft of property rights.

The phrase used to say gay is wrong actually translates (Loosely since it's been a couple of years since the Rabbit talked about this) to the fact that unnatural relations are wrong. But it doesn't specify what is an unnatural relation. Reconstructionists interpret this to mean that going against your true self is wrong, Hasids interpret it as gay is wrong. But these are interpretations by the rabbis, not part of the law.



stella41b -> RE: Is God a Democrat or a Republican? (9/11/2009 4:54:51 PM)

Not sure, but I'm pretty sure that God is a woman from California.

How so?

1. She's as unpredictable as hell.

2. She expects you to believe without knowing all the facts.

3. She's been communicating with followers of three main religions but can somehow never get the story straight.

4. She never goes into therapy because she spends too much time talking with patients in psychiatric wards and inspiring them to dream.

5. She makes mistakes and causes accidents.

[Note: Not ALL women from California are like this and I'm not being 100% serious]



HatesParisHilton -> RE: Is God a Democrat or a Republican? (9/12/2009 10:49:40 PM)

God is a meritocrat.

so stop proslityzing, praying, tithing, pointing, and learn to do what you claim to be good at because the finals of "God Idol" are coming up next week.



Lumus -> RE: Is God a Democrat or a Republican? (9/12/2009 10:56:27 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

At no point does the Old Testamount say that gay orientation is wrong.


Not to be a killjoy but Leviticus disagrees:

Leviticus 18:21-23 (New International Version)

21 " 'Do not give any of your children to be sacrificed to Molech, for you must not profane the name of your God. I am the LORD.

22 " 'Do not lie with a man as one lies with a woman; that is detestable.

23 " 'Do not have sexual relations with an animal and defile yourself with it. A woman must not present herself to an animal to have sexual relations with it; that is a perversion.


I didn't write the thing, but there it is. [edited for formatting]




HatesParisHilton -> RE: Is God a Democrat or a Republican? (9/12/2009 11:01:42 PM)

And that was just a Meritocratic test to see if you get caught up on small talk bullcrap.



thishereboi -> RE: Is God a Democrat or a Republican? (9/13/2009 5:32:25 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: SpinnerofTales

(This thread is started with tongue firmly in cheek)

In reading the bible, one has to wonder if God is a democrat or a republican. For example:

God fed the children of isreal with mana from the heavens (a social welfare program....democrat)
God took a firm stand against gay rights (republican)
God stood for strong law enforcement and harsh penalties in the old testament (repbulican)
God changed the laws in favor of forgiveness and reconcilliation in the new testament (democrat)

of course, God also commanded that 10% of everything be given to him, a high tax policy (both democrat and republican)

So...what can you come up with.....democrat or republican and why?




Yes, but you are going under the idea that God is doing all of this, but from my understanding it was Jesus who fed the people fish, but I have never read a passage where he speaks out about gays. Now according to Paul, God has a problem with them, but no where can I find that Jesus even brought the subject up. The old testiment was all about God, no Jesus there, but he is in the new testiment.

So in conclusion, God is a republican and Jesus is the democrat in the family. At least by your examples gven.



sunshinemiss -> RE: Is God a Democrat or a Republican? (9/13/2009 6:24:06 AM)

ohhh... and god's a hairdresser.

Women aren't supposed to braid their hair.  Harlots!  For shame, harlots!



Musicmystery -> RE: Is God a Democrat or a Republican? (9/13/2009 6:44:33 AM)

Who can forget the convention's "A vote for Bush is a vote for God!"

It was a sickening perversion then and now. So was a few bishops refusing John Kerry communion.

Centuries of horrific abuse prompted the founders to be clear about keeping church out state.

Unfortunately, many of those escaping this abuse then became the abusers.

I would think people of faith would rise indignantly against such distortions, but clearly, the majority will embrace it instead, actively or passively.

When scholars one day write about the end of the American democracy experience, this will be among the primary themes.



HatesParisHilton -> RE: Is God a Democrat or a Republican? (9/15/2009 10:52:47 PM)

God is NOT a retailer in abooth at ChicgoCon, btw.

God DRAWS comics, he doesn't just resell or read them.

Part of the "Creation" aspect, sadly.



Lashra -> RE: Is God a Democrat or a Republican? (9/16/2009 3:16:42 AM)

God is a member of the Green party. S/he believes in live and let live, take care of the planet, that sort of thing.

~Lashra



sunshinemiss -> RE: Is God a Democrat or a Republican? (9/16/2009 3:19:35 AM)

I don't knwo about God, but Jesus is a DJ.  I saw it on that comic show - Lucy, Daughter of the Devil... or something like that. 



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