Newbie Questions for Mistresses

Newbie Questions for Mistresses (Full Version)

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shadowpleasure -> Newbie Questions for Mistresses (8/21/2009 1:32:00 AM)
Hello. I'm very new to this world, but very excited by every detail I've read about it. I was wondering if I could respectfully ask some questions to the experienced mistresses out there. What are good and appropriate ways a sub can meet or even request someone to be his dom? What are good qualities a sub should strive to achieve, and what qualities are attractive to most doms? How did you meet your sub/s? I'm looking forward to reading my mail, and I deeply appreciate your time in helping this bondage virgin.

LillyoftheVally -> RE: Newbie Questions for Mistresses (8/21/2009 2:11:21 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: shadowpleasure What are good and appropriate ways a sub can meet or even request someone to be his dom? In regard to the first, local munches/groups/events. Forming bonds online. In regard to the second, how does one ask a girl to be his girlfriend? quote: What are good qualities a sub should strive to achieve, and what qualities are attractive to most doms? How did you meet your sub/s? What good qualities should a partner strive to achieve? What qualities are attractive to most people? Please if you do one thing, maintain your grasp of reality, being involved in wiitwd does not mitigate everything you have learned before. Compatibility is still important, no two dominants are the same. Be yourself, and look for someone who looks for what you are.

DarkSteven -> RE: Newbie Questions for Mistresses (8/21/2009 4:06:12 AM)
OP, there are two different things you can get, and I'm not sure which you want. You can get either occasional bondage and floggings, etc., or you can get a full blown D/s relationship. If you want the former, go to munches and play parties and play. If you want the latter, munches and play parties are still good meeting places, but you're looking for something different. You'll be getting a full relationship with a women and all that entails, and you'll get the D/s as a side dish, not the main course.

LillyoftheVally -> RE: Newbie Questions for Mistresses (8/21/2009 4:07:50 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: DarkSteven If you want the latter, munches and play parties are still good meeting places, but you're looking for something different. You'll be getting a full relationship with a women and all that entails, and you'll get the D/s as a side dish, not the main course. I met two of the most influential people in my D/s life at a fetish event.

DarkSteven -> RE: Newbie Questions for Mistresses (8/21/2009 4:13:59 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LillyoftheVally quote: ORIGINAL: DarkSteven If you want the latter, munches and play parties are still good meeting places, but you're looking for something different. You'll be getting a full relationship with a women and all that entails, and you'll get the D/s as a side dish, not the main course. I met two of the most influential people in my D/s life at a fetish event. LOV, thanks for pointing out that I didn't express myself well. I MEANT to say that OP would be looking for a LTR at essentially, a party. Munches and play parties are great places to meet people, whether for play or LTRs or for that matter friendships. The only thing is that he may be looking for things that most attendees may not be looking for. But as you state, people can and do form LTRs with people from the parties.

fadedshadow -> RE: Newbie Questions for Mistresses (8/21/2009 6:00:56 AM)
i'm not really experienced myself but i think being yourself is pretty important

MsStarlett -> RE: Newbie Questions for Mistresses (8/21/2009 6:04:08 AM)
I keep telling every single sub that approaches me "Just talk to me like a human being." Doesn't appear that men know how to do that.

fadedshadow -> RE: Newbie Questions for Mistresses (8/21/2009 6:12:44 AM)
good morning, MsStarlett =]

openmindedslave -> RE: Newbie Questions for Mistresses (8/21/2009 6:16:33 AM)
Here are a few things you should not do .. 1. Do not let your first email say ONLY WOW YOUR PRETTY DO YOU NEED YOUR TOES SUCKED I AM FROM ANOTHER COUNTRY AND I WILL PAY FOR YOU TO COME HERE I LIKE TO (_________) MY MOTHER AND FATHER DIED AND I HAVE BEEN LIVING WITH AN EVIL FAMILY. I AM A PRINCE IN AFRICA AND IF YOU WILL HELP ME TO GET MY $15, MILLION OUT OF MY COUNTRY ,I WILL GIVE YOU HALF. and don't write emails in capital letters also

fadedshadow -> RE: Newbie Questions for Mistresses (8/21/2009 6:18:18 AM)
lol nice

openmindedslave -> RE: Newbie Questions for Mistresses (8/21/2009 6:30:07 AM)
Actually , as corney as it may sound just be yourself. If someone writes something in a journal entry you find amusing ,comment on it .If something intrigues you about a profile , ask them a question .Show your brain is in the head above your shoulders. Remember if your trying to be someone your not from the begining , then your set up to fail once they discover your not who they though you were.. Not all , but many on here are real people who just want to find their little piece of happiness.Many have kids , jobs , family , and events in their lives like you do Rarely will you ever find anyone living 24/7 in a dugeon or strutting around in thigh high boots waiting by their computer for the next sub to present themselves to them. Just have reasonable expectations. Be honest about who you are and what your seeking . Do not turned away or feel less successful if some people are not into you. But as a Sub/Slave , you probably will have to make the first move to get a Ladies attention . So just don't sound like every one else ,,Some ladies get more than a doz offers a day and with so many they just don't have time to go and look at every profile to see what they have to offer. They judge many by what you say the first time . So be considered. Don't give them a laundry list of what YOU wany them to do for you. Don't send the same form letter over and over again. Read the proile to see if there is something there that really interest you . Read the profiles also of the ones who don't have pictures .There are some great people who just don't want their picture out here. And most of all don't rush it ..take some time to find those out here Good luck

fadedshadow -> RE: Newbie Questions for Mistresses (8/21/2009 6:38:45 AM)
i agree

LdyyR -> RE: Newbie Questions for Mistresses (8/21/2009 10:18:47 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MsStarlett I keep telling every single sub that approaches me "Just talk to me like a human being." Doesn't appear that men know how to do that. Its been my experience as well, and it seems mostly to be because they want the fantasy, they don't want to deal with a person with real human emotions. If you want more that anything outside of just some play than you aren't really a Domme, you are just looking for a boyfriend according to them. I don't believe it will change at least not on the net. We've been telling these gents for years, and most right here on CM, what we want and still they ask the same questions and repeat the same behaviors time and time again. Though there are a few newer males around of late that seem to be getting the message.

MsVengeange -> RE: Newbie Questions for Mistresses (8/24/2009 2:42:25 PM)
As a Mistress, I believe that all should first ask the questions least asked. Sometimes only one can truly know and understand what a slave truly desires if they ask the right questions. If one asks ony the wrong questions, then a slave will never find the "right" Mistress or Master who can and will fulfill their dreams and fantasies.

MsStarlett -> RE: Newbie Questions for Mistresses (8/25/2009 4:30:00 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LdyyR We've been telling these gents for years, and most right here on CM, what we want and still they ask the same questions and repeat the same behaviors time and time again. Though there are a few newer males around of late that seem to be getting the message. So true, so true. At least some of these younger, newer ones, like Faded, Pyro and possibly this new Shadow appear to be eager to learn the correct way to treat a Lady. Of course, my father was a proper Southern Gentleman and spent much of our time teaching me how a gentleman SHOULD treat a lady and how she should respond. He also taught me that if my date didn't know the 'rules' then I should force him to comply via 'passive aggression'. If a young man doesn't know to open the door for me, then just stand there until he does, or sit in the car until he figures it out that he should help a lady out. If a man does not know that he should walk on the street side of a lady, then firmly switch sides. That sort of thing. My dear father was teaching me to be a lady, little did he know that he was also teaching me to train subs. [:)]

MsStarlett -> RE: Newbie Questions for Mistresses (8/25/2009 4:31:21 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: fadedshadow good morning, MsStarlett =] And good morning to you also, Faded. You know, you are allowed to respond to my Cmail, or to just drop me a line... as long as you do not included photos of your penis.

SweetNika -> RE: Newbie Questions for Mistresses (8/25/2009 4:39:27 AM)
First and foremost be yourself, don't try and portray someone or something your not. Then approach a dom/me like you would approach anyone, they are human beings before they are that label. The d/s relationship is still a relationship and takes the basic dynmaics as a vanilla one the specific expectations however, vary from person to person.

cal1951 -> RE: Newbie Questions for Mistresses (8/26/2009 12:12:45 PM)
greetings to A/all may i ask where this ones g/f can go to learn and help Her be a Domme. She does have it in Her to be Domme but She is alittle hesitent about things. She does want to learn as i do also. t/y cal

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