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New to it all - 8/4/2009 6:34:45 AM   
jenn9182


Posts: 2
Joined: 8/4/2009
Status: offline 		 hi...my name is jennie...me and my husband are new to all of this.  we both like switching but he seems to be a bit more dominant than myself.  we're just looking for suggestions for beginners and things of that nature.  he has asked me what types of things i would do if it was my turn to be the submissive.  i keep drawing blanks.  he's currently incarcerated and we've been writing back and forth about this for months now.  i joined this site in hopes to get us more information for when he returns home and we can begin to really explore it.
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RE: New to it all - 8/4/2009 6:42:13 AM   
Prinsexx


Posts: 4584
Joined: 8/27/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: jenn9182

 hi...my name is jennie...me and my husband are new to all of this.  we both like switching but he seems to be a bit more dominant than myself.  we're just looking for suggestions for beginners and things of that nature.  he has asked me what types of things i would do if it was my turn to be the submissive.  i keep drawing blanks.  he's currently incarcerated and we've been writing back and forth about this for months now.  i joined this site in hopes to get us more information for when he returns home and we can begin to really explore it.

I wouldn't want to tell anyone else what they would need to do. I think that might be the majority of the responses here. But having said that you seem to have some amazing positions of strength from which to start: what i mean by that is that you have a marriage and a commitment to stay strong for when he gets out.
i also think that two switches in a relationship is complex@ rather like having four people in a relationship. If both are feeling submissive nothing gets done not even the housework in my experience. When both are feeling dominant then it usually mean there is a battle of wills going on.
Learn to read the signs and be prepared to switch according to his needs for a while. That alone will ensure his dominance.
It's not all about rope tricks.
Welcome to the forums.


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RE: New to it all - 8/4/2009 10:55:19 AM   
MasterSlaveLA


Posts: 3991
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: jenn9182

...he has asked me what types of things i would do if it was my turn to be the submissive



If you're the "submissive" (i.e., the one being controlled), then HE is the one that's supposed to come up with "things" to "do" to you.  Or do you mean things you'd be WILLING to do???  If the latter, then I'd suggest simply Googling "BDSM Checklist" and in filling it out and sending it to him, you'll demonstrate what BDSM related activities interest you.



< Message edited by MasterSlaveLA -- 8/4/2009 10:58:43 AM >

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RE: New to it all - 8/4/2009 8:34:42 PM   
jenn9182


Posts: 2
Joined: 8/4/2009
Status: offline 		thank you all for your replies....we're both pretty new to exploring the whole sub dom thing....he is DEFINITELY more dom than i am...i am normally the submissive but there are times he likes me to be dominant and actually try to phsyically hurt him with like belts and things....but normally it's him in control...we both want to explore things like choking and whips and everything we just haven't figured it all out lol....hopefully we'll have more information on everything by the time he gets out so we can play and have fun.

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RE: New to it all - 8/4/2009 8:49:54 PM   
DarkSteven


Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterSlaveLA

If you're the "submissive" (i.e., the one being controlled), then HE is the one that's supposed to come up with "things" to "do" to you. 



Perhaps his Internet access to kink is limited while in prison.


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RE: New to it all - 8/5/2009 6:06:15 PM   
LookieNoNookie


Posts: 12216
Joined: 8/9/2008
Status: offline
Riiiiight.

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RE: New to it all - 8/6/2009 11:54:53 PM   
UKEvolutionary


Posts: 60
Joined: 11/20/2006
Status: offline 		I would suggest that you read up as much as you can from various blogs, Journals, and web sites to learn what it is that you wish to do, and from them find "direction".
I found a good one to be leathernroses.

Good luck in your search and Be safe.

(in reply to LookieNoNookie)
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RE: New to it all - 8/7/2009 12:22:08 AM   
slaveboyforyou


Posts: 3607
Joined: 1/6/2005
From: Arkansas, U.S.A.
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: jenn9182

 hi...my name is jennie...me and my husband are new to all of this.  we both like switching but he seems to be a bit more dominant than myself.  we're just looking for suggestions for beginners and things of that nature.  he has asked me what types of things i would do if it was my turn to be the submissive.  i keep drawing blanks.  he's currently incarcerated and we've been writing back and forth about this for months now.  i joined this site in hopes to get us more information for when he returns home and we can begin to really explore it.


I don't think you are able to come here anymore. I'm sorry, but you are unavaliable to us.

(in reply to jenn9182)
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RE: New to it all - 8/7/2009 5:25:39 AM   
Acer49


Posts: 1434
Joined: 8/7/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: jenn9182

 hi...my name is jennie...me and my husband are new to all of this.  we both like switching but he seems to be a bit more dominant than myself.  we're just looking for suggestions for beginners and things of that nature.  he has asked me what types of things i would do if it was my turn to be the submissive.  i keep drawing blanks.  he's currently incarcerated and we've been writing back and forth about this for months now.  i joined this site in hopes to get us more information for when he returns home and we can begin to really explore it.


I do not believe doing a series of tasks makes you a submissive. A submissive comes feels from within, I am sure the others here will give you ideas of some of the things they do to put themselves in that state of mind

(in reply to jenn9182)
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